Critical mum

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My mum tends to treat me like a kid and anyrtime she comes around to my place she is always having a go at something. Telling me how things should be done with my duck, garden, dealing with neighbours, my security door etc it makes me feel nervous and anxious whenever I am around her. I am an adult and should be able to run my place and deal with the people who I want. James (my neighbour) had no right to swear at me and that was upsetting Mum often makes out like I have done something wrong in my interaction and in some cases this might be true but not always and thats not the case I was upset with James for making a time and not coming to me that is rude. Does anyone else have parents like this if so how do you deal with them?

My mom is uber critical. And no matter what I say or do her image of my and my flaws will never go away. I still live with her so it is pretty hard. I wish I had my own place so badly. I am working so that I can afford decent apartment or cabin, but she doesn't want me to move out and she keeps suggesting that I don't work and such. So I can stay at home and clean clean clean. She blames me for my depression, and says that I have a "deep rage" and I inflict this "deep rage" by not talking to her that often.

Hmm... not wanting to talk to people... wow the whole AS community needs anger management IMMEDIATELY.

So what if I don't say, "Good morning" or what other tacit social rule thing I don't know what to do but she automatically assumes that I should know to do it, and that I do know that I should do it but I really don't do it because I am angry at her and what to piss her off instead of the plain fact that I don't know what to do.

Alright, that was a bit of a vent but yeah, drives me crazy.

No because we never bonded, never agreed or got on... maybe just two different!

I get on well with my parents but they're still critical of how I live, who I married, what I feed my kids, how long I work etc...

That's what parents are for I guess.

Mine tend to have a go at me sometimes. mostly for the way i present myself(its mostly mum, dad says stuff just to get mum off his back)

its amazing how easy parents can make one feel bad about oneself.

There was an incident about a year ago that really affected me and I wish I had handled it differently. My grandma is 94 and needed help getting up from the table I said to mum I will help but I am desperate to go to the toilet and am going first she was screaming at me no help Mim eventually mim said just go but it still resulted in my pants being a little bit wet. It made me feel humiliated and embarrased as well as very angry. I wish I had simply said bugger you am I going anyway but mum tends to be able to control me, she had no right to act like that I adult. Now I make it pretty clear by how I phrase things I say I am going to the toilet first if she challenges me hopefully next time I will ignore her.