Hunger for recognition

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Of course I would be hungry for love, but this seems unattainable. So I look only for recognition. When I started to drive I marveled that the car behind didn’t squeeze me out of existence, just to be sure I exist a queue would be enough, sometime I gain a friendly smile, which is directed at the little dog I go around with, but it’s a sort of oblique recognition of me in a way or so I try to interpret it. It's a kind o parasitism on the dog.

I feel this is a good point, because of our emotional chaos we reach out in other ways.

I have found working with children that just a little bit of extra encouragement makes such a difference.

That's what I love about children and animals. They just accept us for who we are, and don't worry about how we 'present' ourselves. They either like us or they don't, and there's no BS involved.

NT world can seem cold sometimes, I know, and difficult to interpret, and often seems 'false' but you are among friends here you know, Paolo. People who like you for who you are and what you say. We all speak Aspie here.

I could've written that post, Paolo. I know everything about feeling invisible (when I'm not being attacked).

What I yearn the most is for someone to seek me just because they enjoy contact with me. I haven't been sought in ages. Someone coming up or calling not because they need something I can provide but because they enjoy being with me.

Yes recognition is something surrogate for affection. The problem here is that to gain recognition as a substitute for affection you are drawn to do a lot of silly things. Isn’t this at the roots of what is called vanity, display?

Last edited by paolo on 20 Jan 2008, 4:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

But I yearn for authentic recognition. Not the kind you manipulate out of other people. I can have that kind any time.

Dogs get you noticed!

Not only dogs recognize you in a rich meaning (they are sincere in their affection, they never lie), but they put you in relationship with dog lovers. The little dog I walk in the city, twice a day, puts me in a milieu of smiling people (she is very well loved). I have called her "macchina dei sorrisi", a "smile producing machine". I am convinced that dog loving people are better people than normal NTs.