how depressed are you?

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Overall (average if you have to), how depressed would you say you feel?

It comes and goes. At the moment quite depressed, on occassions suicidal

I had dealt with depression for a long time, attempted suicide twice. Then I discovered AS and am, for the first time since I can remember, very comfortable in my skin.

I still feel frustrated at certain times about certain things, though overall my feelings these days are general contentedness through to elation.

Even with AS im usually depressed. Not because of who I am, but how others have treated me, it haunts me.

It depends... Never that severely, moreso anything that could cause depression for me usually causes disgust instead, but sometimes it creeps in a little.

I've thought about suicide but I don't have enough willpower to do it.

I answered not at all but I want to qualify that: not at all now. I've gotten therapy (which I haven't done for a while now) and an anti-depressant prescription (which I intend to take forever if I have to no matter how much it may "feel" like I don't need it any more). I've been debiliattingly depressed more than once in life and I'm so very happy I finally actually did something about it.

I was moderately to severly depressed for 3-4 years, I'm in the process of getting better now. Yay!

I'm pretty consistently depressed. It's gotten to the point that being happy makes me nervous because I know it won't last and I'm anxious about how it will end. If my mom didn't say she'd kill herself if something happened to me I would have killed myself a long time ago, several times over.

I get waves of dysphoria related to my epilepsy. Usually I'm EXTREMELY happy... like scary happy. Like going 65-mph on a 45-mph road, or pushing someone down the stairs because i think it will make them laugh.

But then when the seizure cycle goes along the dysphoria happens, usually for about a day. I end up slicing my entire arm, or throwing myself against the walls and the floor, or jumping off the deck, and CRYING CRYING CRYING... and SCREAMING SCREAMING SCREAMING, and a bunch of my ripped out hair is left on the floor. I've destroyed my dresser in a fit of dysphoria, I've punched people in their faces, I've done things that i will hate myself forever for.

But when the cycle is done I'm JUST fine... like nothing ever happened. Then within 1-3 days later I will have a cluster of seizures. (I have simple partial seizures... so problems in the temporal lobe are common).

I certainly have the willpower for suicide but I've got my family to consider.

EXACTLY why I'm not dead. Sure none of my "friends" will miss me, but I've got my little sister I have to keep fighting for.

Anyone else with AS get hit by "very depressed" moods in the absence of sympathetic attitudes? I get big time depressed, but it manifests itself on a mostly subconscious level (lethargy, inability to think, triggerless crying). Is this just high cognitive dissonance or an inability to read my own feelings adequately?

ditto

A bit. Nowhere near suicidal though and a lot of it's seasonal.

I'm very depressed but I was worse a few days ago. I have attempted suicide once in the past and it was an unpleasant experience. They just sent me home from the hospital when it was clear I wasn't psychotic. The psych who evaluated me actually gave me a choice. I'm alive now because of my family rather than any quality of living that I find particularly attractive.