Mood Swings!!?

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I have many mood swings throughout a single day. It doesn't matter how small or irrelevant something is, it can still change my mood for the better or the worse.
I have times throughout a single day where I can be completely carefree, worrying about nothing and just enjoying the beauty of the world. Then I see something as trivial as a boy pulling leaves off a tree branch and that sets me off into thinking nothing but bad of the human race and wanting out of this world!

I arrived home from being out with my social worker today. She took me to a reserve where I was going to take some photos. Only I arrived there to find that my camera battery was flat, even after I charged it last night! It didn't really bother me at the time, actually, I was rather apathetic about the whole situation.
Then when I arrived home, I thought that my mother had been crying as her eyes were all red and puffy. I asked her if she had been crying and then she accused me of "always thinking that she is crying"! !!
Anyway, I went upstairs as to avoid a confrontation. She opened my bedroom door to try and talk to me. I screamed and slammed the door. Then 5 minutes later I felt like crying...and now, I don't feel anything but pure hatred for anything and everything in this world. 15 minutes ago I had so much energy but now, all I can think about is wanting to sleep and [in my time] it's only 2:17pm!
Last night, I was so hyper and was sure that I was going to do great things with my life. Now all I can see for my future is failure.

These mood swings are not only effecting my life, but the lives of those who have to live with me. My pets have even taken to going outside everytime I raise my voice.
I have videos of myself from 7 years ago. I watched them 2 days ago. I was so carefree, just being a child like I was meant to be. I honestly don't know where that person has gone, or who i'm mean't to be anymore. Most of all, I don't know how I became the person who I am today...but for every reason, I don't like who I am.

Now as I finish writing this, I've gone from feeling hatred for everything in this world, to being completely numb.
I don't even know why i'm writing this, or why I even bother. It's not like anyone really cares anyway. Some might say this is self-pity....but so what? I should just get over it? But it's not that easy anymore!! I'm sick of pretending that everything is fine when people ask me if I'm ok. The truth is, I don't think I'll ever be ok. I seem to go from one issue to the next, but instead of dealing with it, I avoid it. This does no good, but I can't cope with facing the truth of my life!
I hate myself!!

Quoted by Tony Attwood:
"A person with Asperger's syndrome may very quickly move into an intense emotion with a relatively minor trigger".

You at least recognize there is a problem and the next step is learning to control your moods. When younger I found exercise, dance helped, never knew then had aspergers of course.

I find my mood just changes, its like a blank screen comes down and every other thought has gone, just a huge empty void, need to be alone, want to shut the world out for a while...
When I feel like this I just tell others I need a little space, but we do have to let others know so they understand...
These links may help, as part of controlling our moods and emotions is to understand them:
Emotional Chaos, Understanding & Expression of Emotions
http://asplanet.info/index.php?option=c ... Itemid=110
Emotions, including meltdowns...
http://asplanet.info/forum/index.php?topic=48.0

Hope this helps a little

I used to get mood swings, all the time. They were so bad, that I thought that I would never have a job, when I was in college. I did end up working, for three years, at a factory. The mood swings seemed to have vanished, as I grew older.

Triggers are an important thing to understand about yourself. Once you start to recognize them, it might be possible to avoid some. When you can't avoid them at least you're aware of what might be going to happen and can do something to make it a bit less severe on both yourself and others. Some of mine are too much war news, too much news period but I am such a political junkie and man can the idiots set me off (see? ) Loud places, bad lighting, open spaces, crowds, too much light as in sun. Something as simple as not doing the clothing correctly can start me itching and not be aware till I've drawn blood. Once I know, I have to get out of them and believe it or not the constant irritation can set me in a mood. It used to be just getting my train of thought interrupted would really set me off, but that's better now that my brain race has eased up some and I can actually remember what and where in my thoughts I was, before the interruption. Some of my triggers are a bit more complex. School was a nightmare and anything that even hints at it or a teacher with an attitude problem can set me off, big time. That one is pretty hard for me to see coming sometimes.

Now having said those things, some times other things are at work. Things beyond our control. I happen to be bipolar as well, which is thought to be chemical in nature. That takes some pro help with, but until you weed out the kind that are triggered, it can mask itself. PTSD and Complex PTSD also can play into this. But for the most part I can ease that some, (you don't have to be a veteran to have either of those types) just by being more aware of my triggers.

Each of us is so very different. Try to develop the habit of observing yourself. I mean it's pretty easy to know when we're in a "mood", but not always so easy to figure out what set it off. It takes practice and pretty soon you may start to see patterns to it.

Good luck Brittany, it isn't fun to be a victim of our emotions. And sometimes we need a little help discovering these things about our self. It is nothing to be ashamed of and when we do get it under control better, it does make life a bit easier.

im really sad to hear that brit *HUG* and you know i care about you

And Brittany does have PTSD.


I was sort of like that too at the end of high school and after. I would be upset that I was failing but too lazy and busy to kep up with school, then happy because they served something really good at the restaurant where you got a full-course meal for $1, then upset because I had nothing to do after, then happy because we had some yummy food at home, then upset because I was being harassed about school by my mother who said she didn't care what I did but still did f*****g care so she was a liar. And also when I was a small child. I would be upset at getting the blue Christmas pencil because blue was my least favorite color, and then I would be happy and excited because my mom had given me a yummy lunch, and then I'd be upset because I was told off in French class for getting a simple assignment wrong, then I'd be happy because it was Friday, then upset because we had no food at home, then happy because we were going to get some really good yummy food.

I was like this growing up, I can control it much better now, but I still get different emotions during PMS.

I'm actually sort of relieved to find others who go through the same things as me...

teenagers are known for mood swings, that's probably part of it

Being trigger-blind sucks. It's like things happen for no apparent reason or if the reason is apparent, it's too late already. Isolating the psychological triggers that surround your everyday life is important even though it can be difficult as these seem to blend anywhere or into anything. I think it starts by discovering a nuetral side of yourself that allows you to detach when necessary. If you let reality indiscriminately flood into you then you'll find disappointment, frustration, helplessness, and anger without any sign of abatement. For sure there is beauty, solace, vibrancy, and subtelty to be found in all things around you but negative triggers exist alongside these as well. Find that nuetral side of yourself so that from a safe psychological space you can choose the aspects of your immediate environment that benefit you instead of hurt you.

I hope this is helpful. I'm still dealing with how to deal with the everyday things in my life as well. Things happen for a reason--not because of some divine grace but because of the imperfection of being human.