I called my manager and told her that about the abuse

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I told my case manager about the some of the abuse and she is gonna call me back and wants me to clarrify what i mean. I kinda wish i hadnt done that cuz now im stuck. its these stuipid drugs i was forced to take they make so i dont know what i think or feel or want and i cant think things through or make decisions if an idea pops into my head im compelled to act on. There is no abuse right now and my mother especially is bending over backwards to be nice to me. if say yes they abused me i might have to take a placement in any part of the country and in a heavily supervised setting.

What kinds of abuse have you suffered?

I know they are going to ask you that question, but I will not be as insensitive as they will be.

outright violence.

No offense or indelicacy are meant by what I say and the questions that I will ask.

If you were/are abused, you probably should say that it happened.

Though if the possible new situation would be worse than the one you're in now, you have to weigh up the difficulties and dangers.

Violence is never justified, except for self defense.

Perhaps it's best to talk to your case manager. Explain about the drugs and how they are making it difficult to think for you to her.

Why are you on these drugs? Do you need them?
If you do need the drugs for something, perhaps a change in the type of drug would help?

I have no need for them. short answer i got stressed out in college.

Is there a way you can get off them easily?

Is there a pattern of abuse in your house? For example abuse, then it stopping for a while and then starting again?
If there is, then it may be best to get out of the situation as and when you can.
If there isn't, then careful analyzing of the situation is required.

im 99% off,

there is a pattern starting for a while stopping strarting again, especially when im displaying my as and personality

Good for you about being 99% off the tablets.

About the on and off abuse, it seems to me that you should tell someone you can trust. It doesn't seem to be healthy to stay where you are. Ask advice from your case manager if you feel that they will respect your choice.

What are your options (to your knowledge) if you tell all about the abuse?

It seems to me that the situation is a not so good place to be in with the little I know of your situation.

if i say that i am in a unsafe house, i will be immediately taken out of the house and relocated to the first avaible bed anyware in the country. the problem is im in some kinda residential program what are they gonna think about me having come off these drugs and the problems they have caused they most likely wont understand what going on with me an will want to medicate me, it might be a high supervised setting that would be very stressfull
i should have not said anything until im completly recovered. so long as dont say or do anything or show individiualllity im perfectly safe in this house, but when i recovered that will be different.

i will also be problably far away from my naturopath and therapist and nuerotherapist it might be very difficult getting new ones where ever i might be who were as good and understood what was going on.

Perhaps waiting in saying about the abuse until you are fully off the drugs and can think clearly (though you seem to be very clear already).

Can you explain to people your needs? i.e. needing your naturopath, therapist, nuerotherapist and explaining the great stress that big and small changes can cause most Aspies to feel.

If you're off the drugs and are able to explain to them (authority figures/law people) that the wrong placement could be as damaging to you emotionally as staying in a place where you are punished for being you, they might then give greater thought as to where to place you?

Truthfully I don't know what is the best course of action for you. What I've said is what I think may be best for your situation, from the information that you've given me. I can see how this will be hard for you whatever course you choose and you'll be physically on your own, I'm sure you'll get emotional support from people here, I'll certainly try to give emotional support to you. Take care.

We are all here for you.
GOOD LUCK ! !!

i remembered today that a communty mental health center close to me is putting up a aspergers specific residential program starting two months from i am gonna be sure to get my name on list and my mom and i are very close with the director of the program( we been going to aspen meetings)