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dughr
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

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Joined: 10 Sep 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 2

15 Sep 2008, 3:39 pm

HI,

I am new here as of today having just found this site. Here is my story:

I am a landlord who rented my house out to a man in his mid 50's, about 4 years ago. I was not sure about him and new he was odd in some way. I did all of my inquiring and in the end found he was recommended in that he is good at paying his rent and does not smoke-drink etc. Over the last 4 years we never knew what his condition was and he had told us he had been discharged from the marines for having schizophrenia. He had just inherited a large sum of money from the death of his parents and as far as we knew he was not being cared for by his surviving brothers at all. We watched him go from a fairly functioning adult, at least from what we saw, to a guy who would collect everything from straw wrappers to cig butts. He would store all of this in his kitchen and was not cleaning anything at all, just tons of trash piling up. He never even put his furniture in place. The movers dropped it off in a pile, couch up side down. 4 years passed and he never touched it, never even turning the couch over. He stayed in the kitchen sleeping on the floor collecting things.

Long ( and I do mean LONG) story short, we finally got the ball rolling to get him help and learned he had been bilked for almost $100,000 by scam artists. He always refused any help and we were helpless as his landlord to do anything against his will. I finally (! !! !! !) found out he is severely in the worst way AS. He is not a schizophrenic at all. He is so debilitated by AS that he can't cook, he eats only fast food, he can't clean at all, he has been in his little world for the last 4 years and has only gotten worse. Conversations with him are so trying that it is hard to get him to stay on the important topic, as you all know. We finally have him in contact with the veterans administration and some local help to get him on some assistance as he is now destitute. As a landlord I need to make ends meet too, but I am very fond of him and can not evict him as he would not have the resources to get help. I do now have some help from one of his brothers but since he is not local and my tenant is living next door to me, I want to do what I can to make things better for him and get him the aid he needs.

So I found this site. I would appreciate any help I can get to lead me to the places where I can find resources to guide him in. Again, he is severely severely AS, it is not mild at all. He barely survives and I am afraid is in declining health due to this situation.

Thank you for any and all help!! !

Doug


I should add, whereas he does love to talk to people, he scares them because he stutters so much and communicates in his own way. He tries to find work, but he goes in to interview wearing t-shits and pants that are unwashed. He shaves rarely and wears clothes until they turn dirt brown and eventually fall off from being so tattered. I could give him new clothes but he refuses to wear them until the current one wears out. So with all this he is unable to work at all.



tweety_fan
Veteran
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Joined: 2 Oct 2007
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,555

17 Sep 2008, 2:15 am

find an AS support organisation in your local area. That would be useful.

I hope things get better.



Saffy
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Joined: 14 Sep 2008
Age: 61
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Posts: 215
Location: New Zealand

17 Sep 2008, 3:17 am

It sounds like this chap really needs to have some professional help and support, I would be contacting your nearest social/disability agency and explaining the situation to them. They may be able to have someone help him with day to day things and help get him on his feet again.
He's very lucky to have someone like you looking out for him.
It sounds like he may be a little further along the Autism spectrum than Asperger's to me.. for day to day tasks he may find lists helpful if he is able to read. Visual communication is so much better for a most people on the Autism spectrum than the spoken word. Helping him establish and maintain some routines around day to day things would also help, he may find it easier to remember to complete tasks if they are something that he does at the same time and in the same way every day.

Is is the house still in the same state ? Although he may not have the motivation to clean it up and organise it, he may well feel better for living in a more organised space. He needs to do this in conjunction with someone else though so that he knows where things are and they are in a place that is acceptable to him, also if he has been living like this for some time, it will need to be done slowly.. since change will be very difficult and distressing for him. It sounds like the living conditions are taking a toll on him...
If he is seeking work it looks as though he is wanting to do something purposeful with his life, is there something that maybe he could do from the security of his home in the meantime ?
I do wish you and him all the best and hope that you can find the right agencies to give assistance.