Is Anger at Solely One Parent Normal?

Post Reply New Topic

I certainly think so. Just this afternoon, mere *minutes* ago, Dad succeeded in pissing me off again (surprise, surprise). You see, I'm not exactly the tidiest person in the world, and my parents know that, but being reminded of that burns me to no end.

We had just gotten back from the grocery store, and I'd settled at my computer in the upstairs den, which was admittedly in poor shape, and Dad *just* had to come upstairs to put spare T.P. in it. As soon as I heard him coming up the stairs, I groaned, knowing that he'd start a tirade of "Mom and I shouldn't have to tell you to keep this place organized", and I was right! So in all logic, I shouldn't have gotten steamed at him, but at myself, for failing to keep up with the cleaning. But sure enough, like always, my anger boiled over quietly inside towards him, and even though I obediently organized the place immediately, my mind was filled with those thoughts again...

The happy thoughts of putting a SOG knife right through his face. It's sickening, sophomoric and immature, I know, but that's just the way I am when it comes to him.

So, my question is, has anyone here ever felt this type of extreme anger with a parent?
My honest opinion is, that anyone who doesn't, is either lying, or NOT normal.

Comments please, and this time, I won't freak out over honest criticisms

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ADDITIONAL: For those who have read my previous thread in which I mentioned playing 'Scarface: The World is Yours' for the PS2 to blow off some steam, and wanted to know why it was so therapeutic to, well, here you go. ^_^

Warning: This contains a LOT of bloody violence and pervasive strong language. This one's NOT for children!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMkKA2MOQq0

Last edited by Usagi1992 on 05 Oct 2008, 12:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.

This paternal problem of yours is getting out of hand. I think your father and you both need to attend councelling sessions. Good luck.

Anyway, all my hate goes to my mother. We're on speaking terms and often get along, but I just can't stand to be around her anymore. She turns into a borderline psychopath without proper medication, and I don't need someone like that in my life.

So I'm thankful I don't live with her anymore.

|-o-| V4der |-o-|

Have to mirror the above...My mothers a depressive twit that hasn't a clue how to connect to me. Just hug attempts, if you don't reciprocate she's not a happy lady and I am tired of giving the prozac pumped nightmare ten cups of green tea a day as compensation. I am like my father, who left, if I had the words to explain why I should live with my father at the time, he would have won custody, i've no doubt. Just have to write to them and try to communicate your anger or it will fester into a real issue, which is a shame if you have to live with your parent for a long time to come. There are moments worth salvaging.

My AS ex-husband-to-be had a really fractious relationship with his mother. It was like he was always on the defense and ready to pounce anytime they were in the same room together. When she was ill in hospital for a month, he visited her just once (and that was only because he didn't want to stay home and be bothered by kids knocking on the door for Halloween; he would have stayed home otherwise and never visited her at all). When she died, I tried a few times to get him to visit her grave, but it never happened.

He adores his father though and will do just about anything for him.

You're so lucky.

As for your above comments, yes, I am attending counseling services for myself, and my therapist has suggested that I bring my father in with me sometimes to work out certain issues. 'Good luck'? Pfft, yeah, I'm gonna need it.

Seriously...I think my solution is that if I got my own apartment, I wouldn't BE around him anymore, thus, I wouldn't have this much anger all the time.

Usagi1992

my parents kicked me out at 17 then put me in a mental institution before I was 18 as a 'wayward runaway'. They are dead now.

Merle

therere likely to be underlying issues that cause the anger that are there without your fathers trigger.

i.e these underlying conditions predispose you to gettign triggered by your father...brother.

a shrink can help you find these conditions.

Well, yes. One previous psychologist said that all this anger is caused by PTSD, due to my never being able to let go of past issues. Even at times when I'm idle and happy, some of those thoughts pop up in my head of bad things my papa had done to me as a kid, and it kills my happy mood.

And that's why I sincerely believe only his death will set me free. I'm not saying to be cruel...that's just the way my mind works.

is it possible that you can move out of home?

I wouldn't know.

You had it hard.

I never had any of this extreme anger to any single parent, at least not for an extended period of time. I believe that was because for all of my family's faults (I'm included in this) we always talk things out if something is not working. I got really lucky in that sense and have attempted to surround myself with people who will explain wtf I did wrong (or vice versa) and how this can be resolved.

I'm truely sorry that you are having this issue with your father. For some reason, some people think that "keep this clean" or "take out the garbage" is a truly simple request and do not understand why we may need some leniance or at least a timeframe... such as "clean up the room every Monday and Friday". You would know your father much better than I would, but you might want to ask him if a schedule would work. Just a suggestion.

You keep getting naggged. For starters. You likely feel they do not trust you to take care of your room yourself, yes? Or is it that they are makeing their 'athority' a reminder? Both feelings seem normal to me. Extreme anger? At what age though.

And yes, I have one parent I have singled out to be mad at a few times. My Daddy, though I am forgiving him, for some things. When I hit myself right in front of my family as a teen, he yelled at me saying I had a "bad attitude". I think that it's very stupid to yell in a self injurer's face for self injuring! Even worse to tell them they are hurting other people doing it, or that they are being bad people!

Things have greatly changed because my parents split up, and he's so nice and actualy happier to. Boy did devorce do justice for my family! I am accepting the fact, that he just didn't know better, because his father was a hot head mostly.

I tell my story so others can measure their comparable lives.
Otherwise how can we know our good fortune?

Merle

This sounds like my father with his mother. The way he spoke to her was, succint, "Yes mother" he didn't attend her funeral which really offended me at the time (because I wanted to see him,) he doesn't see any of his family, he always favouritised me though so we met up a whole once, which is odd, though we both love routine. I miss pasty and dad's army day