I come here to vent because I feel thats all I feel comfortable contributing. Well my reasons still stay the same as to why I am now the person I was. Its BS that I have to go through this. I see other people who are going through life how I was going through life, comfortably, without struggle. Nothing in my life is coming to me easily, maybe I have a past that I am misinterpreting. I remember a past that consisted of easiness. I didn't have to struggle to keep track of anything, I didn't have to struggle to remember to do something. Now I have to wake up every morning reminding myself of who I am and what I have to do.
Am I living my life as I think I should be living, So this is why I only why I say what I say and do what I say?
I see myself as only doing what I am doing because I can't do anything else. I remember when I figured out that electronic prices always decrease after a few years and that it would be better to buy them at that time or a car for the same reason. I can remember it but I can never follow through with it or that.
My communication is crap also, I can never put into words at the right moment of what I have thought through the day. I could do that before, when something was necessary to say I would say what I have thought before.
To sum it up my life sucks. This is a struggle everyday, being in class, going out in public, driving.
I use to be class president in 5th grade, had a 4.0 in 5th grade and good grades until my freshman year in high school. But I still go to college because if i stopped, the people behind me will catch up to me then I will be one less step closer to my degree and not going to college could make it worse for me.
01 Oct 2011, 1:10 am
