days are getting worse, i'm losing my mind

Post Reply New Topic

simply said as in the title, i'm just going crazy and there is nothing i can do about it... i'm just so tiiiiiiired of it______________________ day by day i care less of learning my japanese because it doesn't feel its worth it but if i don't, then i feel even worse over the day... Its impossible for me to still change my future, i've been wondering alot if i would ever make it till i'm 30+. There isn't even a little f*****g bit of hope in my life. I can't even imagine how my future would look. And with all the gluten s**t crap and milk and f*****g school and crappy s**t home and depression and sitting on my pc till its freaking midnight!! There is no type of enjoy unless watching some anime thats it maybe tv too but there isn't more. I dunno how much longer i can take it it drives me crazy and makes me so damn sick all the time. i develop more and more stims stupid anoying somethimes painful STIMS! I'm really losing it, daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn (btw most of those stims are on the face and most is saying something. Like when i'm about to burst out of anger i just making a noise something like "niii" while pressing my teeth against eachother or saying "hnnnnn" or something like that alot more) i need help because i'm losing IT!...

Don't worry mate, I understand coz I've been there. I'm still here though, and trying to survive another day, and having hope. If you're unmotivated like I am, well to be honest, I don't really have any advice. Sometimes I think a complete change in necessary, but I know that I don't deal well with change.

Maybe you should try to speak with someone close to you, who you feel might offer some support. The worst thing to do, is to isolate yourself and withdraw into a bubble, although this is the easiest thing to do. I would tell you to get out more, take long walks, and if you can drive go for spin just by yourself. Try to break free from your current state the best way you can. Good luck, I hope you feel better soon....

i feel your frustration so much. i work in a school so i know how awful it is. is there -anybody- at school (an adult) you trust who you can talk to?

no, i have no one i can trust tbh... its better then yesterday because its morning and i have no school today ^^ Though i'm calm now, stims won't go away i guess there permanent the next few days that passed by where pretty frustrating =( still don't have a clue what to do and thats actually #1 priority

undercover-
are you in the USA? if so, can you take the a high school graduation equivalency test (in california we have the G.E.D. and the C.H.S.P.E.) so kids can leave high school with a certificate instead of a diploma. can you get OUT of school and maybe get a job or go into college or????
do you think meditation/yoga might help your stimming?

first of all i don't live in the usa second of all my stephdad is very strict with school so staying home or finish early is deffinetly not going to happen 3th off all yoga/meditation won't work because:
-its not going to help me solve my problems
-lack of space (really)
-i've got something on my groin so it might hurt incredible much if i do that
-i have trouble asking anything on my parents
-and so on and on...
my problems are deffinetly not small don't mistake it with a small rant

I would definitely not recommend finishing school early. The more qualified you are, the more pathways are open to you in future, and you want to keep as many pathways open as possible at this stage in your life.