There's no hope for me

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I keep getting fired from jobs. At this rate, I'm going to be living in a van down by the river. I wanted to have kids and raise a family but if I can't support myself, why bother? I don't think there's a future for me. I'm washed-up. A has-been. I've sold out and I don't know what I'm living for anymore. What's the point of living when I f**k everything up???! !!

dont you have some sort of social security system?

im lucky, we got automatic unemployment pay here, so ive been paid for by the gvt, even without a diagnose or anything. when i (finally) get one, theyll actually pay me more

i know this probably doesnt help :S

can you look for... "lowlife" positions, within jobs you'd actually LIKE? theyre hard to think of, but like... my stepmother suggested that i could for example apply for a job as a veterinarian's assistant or something. small jobs you dont need big education for, but that arent lothesome?

I know it is rough trying to find a job in this economy(with reports of over 1000 applicants for single positions!) It sounds obvious but I think you need to look for jobs where you will have very little interaction with others, such as working night shift security or stocking shelves in a grocery store.

I would focus on trying to find a job that puts emphasis on task completion as opposed to providing a service. I have a long history of getting fired from jobs because they were mostly all service occupations in which I was tremendously unhappy and unsuccessful because my main function was dealing with people. Unfortunately, in a decaying service economy, most jobs for younger adults that are still hiring are things that require alot of multitasking and customer interface, such as fast-food or retail work.

My NT mother, who is a real people person(at least to their faces), used to ask me before I had was diagnosed and I went to apply for jobs as a security guard," Wouldn't you be sooo bored just sitting there all night?" I always wanted to say no, but I bowed to her intense pressure and went and applied at places I knew I would hate, like a restaurant. I worked as a cook at Hooters for two months but the atmosphere was just too overwhelming and I was eventually let go, so now I know to look for work in suitable locales.

So yeah, stay away of places like Fast-Food, low-level office work, the military, anything where you're behind a counter. I would reccommend a library, because of the relative silence and low-key nature on the place. You might be happy doing something like stocking shelves or a job where your function is to monitor something. Look for something with out much responsibility or multitasking, and stay away from hypertense work environments. The AS mind is geared towards task completion and maintaining an equilibrium or a status quo. The AS mind is not geared towards human interaction.

And if all else fails just go on disability.

Not enough data here to make specific suggestions ... only generalisations ... need more data, like where are you, what are your skills and interests?

This may sound like a crazy idea to you - but how about being the boss? Start your own company or something.

What are your interests?

I've been there, done that. If you are good at your skills, just a matter of time until it falls apart. For me that took 8 years, and it has fallen apart in painful slow motion.

Unless you have an extremely supportive social friend or mate, I don't recommend it. And you better have backup friends, as wit AS it isn't uncommon to have a friend get sick of you in hard times.

As others stated, for many the most practical become a Lighthouse keeper. The kind of jobs social people hate - often night shifts or remote locations. If you can work travel into it - you can enjoy food and other things you may like. Keep working on your social skills, but outside work. A stable job will only help your social life...

That is why I was asking him his interests. If he is interested in IT than he can utilize the Internet to his advantage. Now a days that is the norm for IT. He can become what they call a "micro ISV"

But yes otherwise it will take a lot of work as you said.

Hi BitterGeek. I don't know for sure what to say. But I do believe that eventually you will get the right job and get the family you want. Things don't always come easy for us. I have gone through unhappy times. But, after time, things have worked out for me. You just have to keep trying. You are not alone.

Ideally, I believe we with AS do best with a job that allows us to explore our interests. Try to find such a job. If you look long enough, I believe you will find it. But if not, keep trying.

Here's a thought that just crossed my mind. What if a person just can't get a job. Ok...well they could always sell Ebay. Go to yard sales, flee markets, junk stores, etc. and buy boxes of stuff and then sell it on Ebay. I am always amazed at what people will pay for stuff. I am one such person that has shocked myself. Just last month I paid $105 for an old cub scout pinewood derby car from the 1960s. And I spent $250 on an old roller coaster blueprint several years ago. Gee...I don't have that kind of money to throw around...but that is how Ebay is...people get in a bidding frenzy.

So...while you are waiting for that job...try something like Ebay...and wait for impulsive buyers/bidders like me to come along.

Don't get down on yourself. Life is to short to not enjoy it. And no matter how old you are, it's never too late to begin your journey in life. My motto is "My journey has just begun." I picked that up after being diagnosed with AS this past November at the age of 44. I now feel like I have just started an amazing adventure.

So...cheer up. Get absorbed in some great interests. Enjoy life. Stay positive. Do some Ebay if you need to generate some cash...or other odd type job. I mean...my wife and I have paid $100 to a local kid to cut our 2 acre lawn before. There are always jobs you can do. I personally don't like to cut grass because I have allergies. And dangerous machinery doesn't always go well with people if they have motor skills issues like some of us with AS/autism. Sorry...I am rambling, but just figure out what you can do.

Please stay in touch with me and let me know how things are going. I am no expert advice giver, but I try to help...I feel I need to help because I want to help.

that may be a valid conclusion. AS is estimated to have an 80% divorce rate. The lack of social skills is not in your favor for a healthy relationship. you have a handicap...

That does not mean you can't be part of the village that helps raise children in your family or friends. Be the best uncle or aunt you can be! You can help without being the primary responsible party.

In both your job and your life, I can recommend this excellent advice. A quote from a person who traveled the world and researched humanity both past and present. Joseph Campbell:

"The way to find out about happiness is to keep your mind on those moments when you feel most happy, when you are really happy — not excited, not just thrilled, but deeply happy. This requires a little bit of self-analysis. What is it that makes you happy? Stay with it, no matter what people tell you. This is what is called following your bliss."

I am a month or two from being homeless myself.... I am going to hoof it down to the northeastern area of texas and live out of my car at a state park somewhere....

Cant find work so I cant afford to pay bills, savings almost gone... saftey in numbers, we can set up camp together if ur in tht area....

Sometimes i feel like i farked things up.. if I done just that, I my as well be an expert and be really good at it... what doesnt kill you makes you stronger...

I'm moving cross-country with a small nest egg and the hope of finding a job out there - if not, it's going to be a rough time. You're not washed up, you're not a has-been... you're struggling like most of the people in the US right now. Cut yourself some slack and keep moving forward.


M.