How to land a jet in 10 easy steps

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I haven't been on a plane since 1990, and I doubt I'll ever see the inside of one again. Like most things with me, if I don't use it, I lose it. I'd forget all that pretty quickly. I voted, Naw, Never. But should I ever make a trip in a plane again, I'll be sure to print up some emergency flight instructions. Just to be safe.

if im going to fly. im going to get a pilots license and fly myself. i accidently voted wrong becase the cat decided to get on my lap and hit the touchpad

i can get it down...but i didint mention do i get it at hole peace down:P

iI know how you feel, ive got three cats...

Problem is, though, even if you wanted to fly yourself, a private pilot's license costs booku bucks, and even a tiny aircraft like a Cessna is a chunk out of the pocketbook... and that's not counting fuel prices, hangar rental, etc. Not that its not possible... i know a guy about a mile or two away who owns a grass runway and flies a Cessna over my house sometimes... its just not for most people's income. Maybe after retirement, for some...

I might be able to do it with some practice, but definitely not without, I'll crash the damn thing!

There has been a new classification for those who do not or cannot go the whole private pilot gig.
The Sport Pikot

It won't teach you to fly jets, but you can enter into flying cheaper than becoming a Private Pilot.

--->http://www.sportpilottalk.com/

You've left out a couple of critical things, to the point where you'll be leaning back in the wreckage of the aircraft a few hundred yards off the far end of the runway....if you haven't slammed into it on landing.....

If you are ever allowed into an airplane cockpit on a commercial airplane DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING.

Reason. Most aircraft today are flown entirely by computer. Those computers can be set up from the ground by people who know what they're doing. In the unlikely event of a crew failure, the ground will know about it long before you do.

Turn around, go back to your seat, and wait for instructions. Amatures don't land an Airbuss successfully, and as you only get one try.....you get the idea.

Please post a picture of yourself, so that if I ever get on an airplane, and see you getting on, I can get OFF!

You do realize this whole thread was meant as a joke, right?

Anyways, i'm afraid i cannot process your request. For various reasons i have found it necessary to maintain a policy of strict Internet anonymity.