What's on your mind right now?

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I get it now DCJ. Goals like that are necessary. They help you focus on something. Also, the more you can align your goals with the things you value most in your life, the more motivated you'll be to achieve them. Otherwise, you might end up like me in that I've put off way too many goals, because I didn't feel like I'd likely get anything I value from them in the near future. It's a hopeless, what's the point, sort of feeling you really don't need on top of the rest of what you face every day.

So what do you value? What makes you feel alive?

One cannot see the value in things around them if they do not see the value in themselves.

At best, life is meaningless

At worse, its nothing but pain

life has no hard-and-fast meaning, so we are free to give it a meaning that suits us, and, yes, if the pain is too great and unrelenting, to end it. i choose my meaning to be in my purpose of making myself and others happy.

That's a very powerful statement right there DCJ. I need to give that some thought in my own life too. Not tonight though. I'm too tired. I also hope that focusing on small goals/small successes will help you reclaim some of that lost value for yourself.

Last edited by DataB4 on 24 Nov 2016, 1:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

I could roll with making others happy but I don't because I am... the R word. I feel bad everytime I post it here but it does describe me best

That'd would be choice too but I don't know how to do it and that is why it is selfish to want to live

Goodnight if that means your going to bed, I am heading in that direction if I die in Skyrim one more time

you are young. i didn't learn small talk until I was over 50. give yourself some time.

I agree with your purpose. Still figuring out the best ways to do that over here.

DCJ, it's not selfish to live because you're figuring things out as you go. In fact, people who consider ending it all are the most focused on themselves and their own pain. They can't see a future, even when others can. I believe in the strong possibility that there's a way forward that you can't see just now.

EDIT: To clarify, I'm not judging anyone personally, just pointing out how depression shifts people's focus to the self and only what's wrong, not what might become right.

Last edited by DataB4 on 24 Nov 2016, 1:31 am, edited 1 time in total.

I would believe in a future if I didn't watch all mine burn

Everyone speaks highly of me for about two weeks

Then it is a down hill slope,

If everyone who saw a future with me stop seeing a future, at what point should I agree?

This is why they have therapists. The right therapist is supposed to be objective enough to help you answer that question by delving into your life and your current options, helping you set small goals, ETC.

Right... therapists...

Okay... Goodnight,

I guess maybe you could translate it directly, but when I google it, what comes up is mostly references to a bordgame or a cardgame. I have thought of my humor as a bit on the edge. I relate more to mens humor. Men make me laugh much more often then women. I think I have gallows humor. I can laugh at things that is really terrible, but I find the tragic part of it funny.

For example once I read about a man who had tried to "travel" by hiding in the space where those big wheels on airplanes are pulled up during the flight. But he either froze to death, or got squeezed by the weels. So apparently bodyparts fell all over when the plane was going to land. What I found funny about it I think is that he was trying to escape something, or flee to another country, and that was SO not a good plan he had made there.

Froya, I don't have quite your gallows humor but I definitely don't relate to those easily offended folks.

DCJ, maybe your upcoming WP post on your life will help direct the conversation then. Anyhow, I'm going back to bed finally.

I am not sleepy at all!

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyways...that's from a song from my brothers playlist I've listened to but I find it relevant.

i need to decompile "farming simulator 17" in order to write a scripting mod that lets me see how much bloody grain all of my train station silo's contain.