11 Oct 2006, 1:42 am
I still don't like to place more significance on the beginning as a separate event or cause for what exists. Because before the big bang, was there nothingness? There could never be nothing, nothing just disappears or appears, everything is in motion.
Maybe pondering the big bang is a beautiful way to discover some truths about existence, but I don't think we should stop our thoughts there.
Where did that energy come from?
I don't think its inconceivable, its just indefinate, I think its entirely within our grasp of understanding.
Its true the more I shed silly preconceived notions I have, the more infinite equations I find working behind the scenes, quantum mechanics, the (current) expansion of the universe etc. The true nature of reality is right here, the way we work inside I believe is a direct result of the way the universe works, yes its hostile, its destructive, but with a purpose, just like anger can be directed towards purpose.
Emotions, cannot be controlled because (I believe) they are a direct (sometimes indirect) representation of the way the universe works, they move up and down, we oscillate, and find ourselves between.
I think we're (concious beings) meant to BE this expression of paradox, to be able to accept it is fundamentally wrong, yet perfect in its motion.
And death?
Its simple to explain though hard to word the logic thats gone behind facing this thought, I was always terrified of it as a kid, until funnily enough I learnt all about decomposition, and the various ways everything that dies becomes a part of everything else.
So I find it logical to think that conciousness itself diffuses and becomes part of all that is/was/shall be in the same way..
Or to tackle it another way, we live, because we die, we die, because we live, whether in the end (singularity effect) we achieve immortality or not, it is still life + death that drives us, just another 2 points with infinate possibilities between..
So it starts black and white, then we start to see other colours, then we see that we even get to choose where we place black, and where we place white, and we actually find ourself in the spectrum of colours between these two.
Wonder if that made sense.
