Good guides for fashion-challenged aspies

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If you want to be a sell out I'm not going to stop you . Just be clean .

I never knew aspies weren't allowed to go outside.

Don't wear pink.

Always wear clothing in public!
Unless you're at a nudist beach, of course.

Based on watching Joan Rivers b**** about people on "Fashion Police," as well as other sources, I think I've figured out some things:
A. The "Cherlyn Manson" Rule:
If you are any of the following, none of the fashion rules apply:
1. Cher
2. Marylin Manson
3. Bjork
4. Annie Lennox
5. Lady Gaga
6. a 80+ year old man.
B. Funeral Rules:
1. None of the Funeral Rules apply if you are deceased.
2. all garments must be black, except for men's dress shirts, which can be white or black. Such shirts may not be white if the deceased is wearing white, scheduled to be or was within a wedding party within 24 hours of death, or if the person was hanged to death, found hanged, killed them-self, or any combination above. This last rule is because a black tie on a white shirt would be disrespectful in the hanging case.
3. Only accessory items may sparkle.
4. none of these accessories may be carried at a Funeral: Bowling gear, fishing tackle boxes, backpacks.
5. Do not wear occupation specific clothes, such as Intel bunny suits, haz-mat gear, work uniforms, and Disney park costumes.
6. all of the above rules may be exempted at theme events.
C. Banned Items:
The following are never acceptable. Ever.
1. Plaid
2. Flannel
3. Sweatpants, especially grey ones.
4. Mint green as a color, because it clashes with everything including itself.
5. All of the clothes from the 80s, except for wedding clothes.
6. Tube tops.
7. Crocs
8. Booty shorts
9. pre-riped clothes
10. speedos, because they're just a desperate cry for attention
11. stirrup pants
12. leg warmers
13. civilian clothing costumes from "Star Trek"
D. Law of extension
1. This list doesn't include all of the fashion rules and is approximate.
E. combination rules:
1. red and green may not be worn together, unless it's December.
2. Black and Orange may not be worn together, unless it's October.
3. pink may not be worn by heterosexual men, unless they say "breast cancer" within 24 hours of wearing it.
4. shorts and black or navy socks may not be worn together.
5. beige may only be worn by people who are dead inside.
6. red and turquoise may not be worn together unless you're Navajo, related to Navajo, or the garment is Navajo manufactured.
7. feathers may only be worn by pimps and models.
F. Pimp rules:
1. none of the combination rules except the pink one apply to pimps.
2. only pimps may wear fedoras.
3. only pimps may wear synthetic animal prints which don't use the colors of the animal it emulates.
G. Wedding rules:
1. train skirts may not exceed the length of the location of the wedding service.
2. Do not wear the same color as the bride, or white, unless you're the bride.
3. Train skirts may not be worn outdoors.
4. Men must wear ties.
5. none of these accessories may be carried at a wedding: Bowling gear, fishing tackle boxes, backpacks
6. Do not wear occupation specific clothes, such as Intel bunny suits, haz-mat gear, work uniforms, and Disney park costumes.
7. all of the above rules may be exempted at theme events.

Dress to be, not to please. In other words, It's more important to dress to suit yourself than it is to dress to please others.