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[ POLL ] What Constitutes Bullying?

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What Constitutes Bullying?
Behavioural – exclusion from work events or activities, non-cooperation, setting unrealistic deadlines or demeaning tasks outside the job description. 14%  14%  [ 18 ]
Correction - factual, grammar, punctuation, and spelling errors, as well as mispronunciation or misuse of spoken words. 3%  3%  [ 4 ]
Denial - withholding intangible favors (i.e., attention, affection, intimacy, et cetera) from others, including strangers. 6%  6%  [ 7 ]
Disagreement - differences of opinion, whether back up by valid facts or not. 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
Displayed – offensive posters, calendars, slogans, graffiti and so on. 9%  9%  [ 11 ]
Ghosting - ceasing all communication and contact without warning; ignoring emails, phone calls, text messages, as well as ignoring one's very presence. 6%  6%  [ 8 ]
Penalizing - responding to anti-social behavior with appropriate actions; reprimands, warnings, dismissals or 'banning, et cetera. 2%  2%  [ 2 ]
Physical – unnecessary bodily contact, making gestures, violence, damage to property, unwanted physical advances. 18%  18%  [ 23 ]
Verbal – rude comments, offensive jokes, banter, patronising comments, bad language, threats, persistent criticism. 18%  18%  [ 22 ]
Written – offensive emails, notes, texts, letters, et cetera. 18%  18%  [ 22 ]
Other: ________________ (Please explain). 6%  6%  [ 7 ]
Total votes : 125

magz
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27 Jul 2020, 3:30 pm

The_Walruz wrote:
magz wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
magz wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
^ So you've never had a post removed from the "Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent" for covert bullying - the defense rests :lol:

and you keep doing it :roll:
Apparently, you find one's history of having posts removed by mods a justification for overt bullying.
The justification I give myself is when lesson are not learned

And yes I am no better for this type of behaviour - sue me :P

Would it then be okay if I started to bully you?
Just a hypothetical question.


bully the bully who is bullying the bully ?

Are you hypothetically asking for my permission ?

Or are you asking if I would be OK about being bullied ?

Or are you trying to point out again that fighting evil with evil is not the way to go ?

The last two.


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27 Jul 2020, 3:35 pm

Kiprobalhato wrote:
recently an israeli made an account here to tell me my Hebrew was s**t and never posted again. that was the first thing i have read on here in years that really got to me. everything else i can shrug off.  i wanted to tell him to suck it and ask "how well did YOU learn your 4th language" (or 3rd of 5th, depending on how and what you count) but cooler heads prevailed in the end.
Sometimes, it's better to ignore the trolls than to engage them and to be confused for one.

Shalom!



The_Walruz
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27 Jul 2020, 3:40 pm

magz wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
magz wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
magz wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
^ So you've never had a post removed from the "Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent" for covert bullying - the defense rests :lol:

and you keep doing it :roll:
Apparently, you find one's history of having posts removed by mods a justification for overt bullying.
The justification I give myself is when lesson are not learned

And yes I am no better for this type of behaviour - sue me :P

Would it then be okay if I started to bully you?
Just a hypothetical question.


bully the bully who is bullying the bully ?

Are you hypothetically asking for my permission ?

Or are you asking if I would be OK about being bullied ?

Or are you trying to point out again that fighting evil with evil is not the way to go ?

The last two.


Yeah it's fine , go for it , I can defend myself usually with sarcasm.

Pointing out 2 wrongs don't make a right doesn't compute in my autistic brain , I'm fighting the good fight in the only way I know how.



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27 Jul 2020, 3:41 pm

The_Walruz wrote:
I'm fighting the good fight in the only way I know how.
Against what or whom?



The_Walruz
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27 Jul 2020, 3:46 pm

Steve1963 wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
I'm fighting the good fight in the only way I know how.
Against what or whom?


boredom



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27 Jul 2020, 3:54 pm

You haven't included psychological bullying, such as gaslighting.
e.g. constantly saying something hurtful then insisting it's a joke and the recipient needs to 'man up', 'haven't you got a sense of humour?' etc.

Or invalidation, where someone says they have a particular problem and people tell them they can't possibly have that problem, or that problem is all of their own making, or Joe Blow has a worse life than you so you can't complain, or you can't have that problem because I never had that problem, you just need to do what I did, so there!

Or when someone asks for support in the haven and people comment, among other things, that they should be run over with a car

Kind of like what goes on here at times.


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The_Walruz
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27 Jul 2020, 4:17 pm

Raleigh wrote:
You haven't included psychological bullying, such as gaslighting.
e.g. constantly saying something hurtful then insisting it's a joke and the recipient needs to 'man up', 'haven't you got a sense of humour?' etc.

Or invalidation, where someone says they have a particular problem and people tell them they can't possibly have that problem, or that problem is all of their own making, or Joe Blow has a worse life than you so you can't complain, or you can't have that problem because I never had that problem, you just need to do what I did, so there!

Or when someone asks for support in the haven and people comment, among other things, that they should be run over with a car

Kind of like what goes on here at times.


We all know , well most of us , that the OP didn't really want enlightenment on bullying , they just wanted justification for their posting style but neglected to mention some of the above - wonder why :roll:

BTW very good post as always Raleigh :)



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27 Jul 2020, 4:20 pm

The_Walruz wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
You haven't included psychological bullying, such as gaslighting.
e.g. constantly saying something hurtful then insisting it's a joke and the recipient needs to 'man up', 'haven't you got a sense of humour?' etc.

Or invalidation, where someone says they have a particular problem and people tell them they can't possibly have that problem, or that problem is all of their own making, or Joe Blow has a worse life than you so you can't complain, or you can't have that problem because I never had that problem, you just need to do what I did, so there!

Or when someone asks for support in the haven and people comment, among other things, that they should be run over with a car

Kind of like what goes on here at times.


We all know , well most of us , that the OP didn't really want enlightenment on bullying , they just wanted justification for their posting style but neglected to mention some of the above - wonder why :roll:

BTW very good post as always Raleigh :)

Oh, ok, my bad.

Thanks!


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27 Jul 2020, 4:48 pm

I started this thread and poll to gain a consensus regarding what constitutes bullying, as stated in the subject line.  A further goal is to include the consensus into a clear and concise anti-bullying rule for this website -- a rule with which the majority of members can work.

Any claims beyond this and/or to the contrary are false.



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27 Jul 2020, 4:52 pm

Fnord wrote:
Any claims beyond this and/or to the contrary are false.
:roll:



magz
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27 Jul 2020, 5:04 pm

The_Walruz wrote:
Steve1963 wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
I'm fighting the good fight in the only way I know how.
Against what or whom?
boredom

Fighting boredom by trolling. Great. You know perfectly well what you deserve.

Ferret, you showed a lot of support when I was near-sucidal but now (and back then in November) you trigger me. Because I have been in a situation where whatever I did or didn't, I was interpreted as evil. And all I had to defend myself was logic and rules, which was interpreted as being even more evil.
I have been in this situation. Seeing someone put in it before my eyes brings all the flashbacks.


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Last edited by magz on 27 Jul 2020, 5:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Fnord
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27 Jul 2020, 5:07 pm

magz wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
Steve1963 wrote:
The_Walruz wrote:
I'm fighting the good fight in the only way I know how.
Against what or whom?
boredom
Fighting boredom by trolling. Great. You perfectly know what you deserve.
Seconded.



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27 Jul 2020, 5:08 pm

Steve1963 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Any claims beyond this and/or to the contrary are false.
:roll:
You got a problem with that?



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27 Jul 2020, 5:09 pm

Fnord wrote:
Steve1963 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Any claims beyond this and/or to the contrary are false.
:roll:
You got a problem with that?
Methinks thou dost protest too much.



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27 Jul 2020, 5:18 pm

If this is the Ferret:

I wish you would come back to the Site as a regular member, and not hide yourself.

We once cooperated in trying to talk someone out of suicide.

Even if you don’t like me, I’d still want you to come back.



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27 Jul 2020, 5:22 pm

Side question: how did you manage to make a poll where people can select more than one option? I wanted to make my own poll (on an entirely different topic) with this feature, but didn't know how.