I actually get embarassed when I get gifts, because I don't feel like anyone should spend their hard earned money on ME and because...this is really embarassing, nobody knows what I really need (I don't want things I "like", that's so Barbie...) and it is hard to be gracious when you get something useless. I always made my point way before holidays that I really don't want presents from my ex in laws, but it never got across. I always like to give as a gift money or a gift card (where you know that person likes to go). But I was raised in a poor country, so I did not grow up with this concept of gifts. Christmas as I remember it was going to my grandma's house (in the countryside at her little farm), with all the family that I really loved, we went to a gorgeous monastery for religious services and spend the rest of the time just having a good time, helping grandma around the farm etc. It's really hard for me to accept this weird type of Christmas that I had to live thru in USA (more like torture with all the shopping and smells etc.). It used to make me really depressed, but I don't care anymore, I just go to my church when they have the Christmas service and go home alone and call it a nice Christmas. When my daughter was little, me and my ex took her to the mall at Christmas time (a very big ordeal for me with AS, but at the time I didn't know I had it and I was just thinking that I was antisocial...), so we took my daughter in a stroller, in a huge mall, with very big "Christmas smells", gingles, big music etc...my exact picture of hell...so at one point, she raised herself up from the stroller and just screamed really loud: "Shut up! Everybody shut up!". I know it's not funny how I say it here, but it was so funny to see and hear that...specially that I didn't know she had such words in her vocabulary (she was only 2). I was so proud of her...
I am not blaming American people that they lost the whole point about Christmas, it is not their fault, it is a capitalist society and the economists got the best of it... And I also know that there are a lot of families in US that spend meaningful Christmases, meaningful from my point of view, because it is meaningful for everybody in their own way.
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Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive.
Dalai Lama
PS For whoever wants to hurt me (in my professional life, for example) using what I posted in confidence here, watch out, I have a good lawyer.