I confess.....

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Woo whooo! I confess that I'm glad someone has finally chimed up who sounds [I think?] crazier than I am.

Good fortune,

- Icarus

I confess that bikers tend to annoy me. Specifically, I mean millitant bicycalists. Do you know what I mean?

On the way home from work tonight, I was driving down a certain strectch of road, same as always. Two lanes, double-yellow in the middle, with a rather generous bicycle lane off to one side. I came zooming down the road, on the way home, doing the limit + 10 as per normal. Then, I come upon these bicycalists... Despite the fact that they have a four-foot wide lane all their one on my side of the road, they're both out in the CAR lane. WTF? Just at that moment, I pass a sign that has a picture of a bicycle up top in a black-on-yellow diamond, and a smaller rectangular sign underneath that says, "Share the road." I get a moment of DIVINE insparation, and I understand what that sign really means. Since there is no oncoming traffic at the moment, I cut across the double yellows into the oncomming lane, and, being in a vehicle that is DESIGNED to travel on these roads, I easily overtake them both and pull along side of them. It was a male in front, female in the rear, from what I can tell. As I pull along side them, I SLOW to their speed, and give them a good eyeballing. I'm in a Jeep Renegade with all of the windows down, wearing my leather cowboy hat. The leader biker gives me a dirtly look, which had an aweful lot of SMUG and CONTEMPT built into it.

So... finally having more than I can take of OBNOXIOUS bicycalists, I swerve hard to the right and give the lead rider a hard KNOCK, sending him flying off the road, into what looked like a blackberry bramble as we were passing. [Ouch!] The female biker behind him swerved and fell off of her bike. As I watched in my rearview mirror driving off, resuming a reasonable speed, I saw her run off in the direction of the guy rider who went flying off into the thorns. And, as I drove off, I remembered the picture of the bicycle and the "Share the road" caption, and understood for the first time what it really meant. I had a warm smile on my face for the rest of the way home; even let a few people cut in front of me without my characteristic agressive tailgating and flipping them off repeatedly. Ahhh, what a good dive home it was today.

[I confess, I made parts of that story up. It was woven from half-truthes and delusion. You figure out which is which.]

[Also, I confess I don't have any good spell-checker installed on the computer I'm using right now. I suck at spelling. Still. Whatever]

Good fortune,

- Icarus the Gas-guzzler

I confess that emotions that I have never experienced before lead me into a state of total confusion.

Last edited by Jimbogf on 12 Aug 2007, 4:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

That isn't what would be expected of a 32 yr old lady(not that one would call me a lady) but what the hell.
I hate Asda/Walmart, and the way they treat their staff at our local store is really crappy.
I spend a lot of time in their cafe but the rest is just

bull dooty. I know, I used to work for them. I wish they would move all their stores to White Sands, Nevada.

I confess I like to pick my nose.

I confess I was just prompted to blurt out the phrase, "Ah man! I got Guinness on my cutlass!"

I confess I was immediately struck by how strange an utterance that was.

Good fortune,

- Icarus the Swashbuckler

I confess that upon returning home I saw the huge, bright yellow notices ("PRIVATE PROPERTY No hunting, no fishing, no invading, blah, blah, ect.") that the neighbors posted all along the fence facing our house. I confess that they made me smile, because they're so absurd.

How's about you stop poaching their rabbits, eh?

I confess that I've brazenly ignored hundreds of NO TRESPASSING signs of various flavors in the course of my adventures; part of the job when you're an infiltrator. BUT, I tend to respect those put up by private citizens. Usually.

Good fortune,

- Icarus the Hobbyist Trespasser

Ah, but there's the thing. We don't hunt, we don't fish, and we don't cross the fence. They do all three. They even slaughter (ie, mow) part of our grass. They used to mow a lot more of it, but my mother put out a pot of flowers, which they have to go around. (Whilst having our grass mowed by them doesn't sound so bad, they keep the blades so low that it scrapes the dirt; there is no grass after they're done.)

I confess that we used to have a No Trespassing sign down in Georgia (we lived in a forest); no one listened to it.

Ohhh, that is sooo infuriating. It's trespassing...period. When I was in HS I used to mow my parent's lawn. When our new neighbors built their house, the guy used to cut at an angle until by the time he got to the street he was across the property line by over two feet. When they built his house, they tore up part of our lawn to landscape his, so they sodded across the property line onto ours, to fix the damage. He always assumed that meant it was his property. I went and added stakes where the property markers were and he still cut our yard. I was a professional lawn care service provider, so cutting at an angle not only upset my inner anal retentiveness, but also my professionalism.

A couple of years ago, some really inbred people moved in next door to my current home. Each week when they cut the lawn, they came over a little further, until they were a whopping eight feet across the line and only a few feet from my house. When I confronted them, they were completely dumbfounded. A few months later, the bank foreclosed on them and they were booted. They had signed one of them sub-prime loans and when the rate jumped, they couldn't afford the payments.

Okay, now to my confession. I confess I killed a bird on Wednesday while driving to work. I forgot to confess about it, because that was the same day I was fired from my program. The bird flew in front of my car and instead of swooping up, it dove down. I thought it had made it, until I saw from my driver's side mirror a small black object fling up in the air in to the left-side rear of my car. It must have got caught up under the car, because it did not get smashed under my tires. Stuff like that bothers me. I don't even step on bugs and walk with my head down to avoid them. In the rain, I some times spend hours saving worms.

Last edited by Trigger11 on 12 Aug 2007, 5:54 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I confess that I am an idiot sometimes.

I confess to Almighty Aspie that my DB Cooper story sucks & I want to do a complete rewrite.

Hmm. Another Portlander. The experiment is progressing acording to plan.

I confess that I'm a writer, and my muse is Tinkerbell.

Good fortune,

- Icarus

I confess-on weekends I hang out at Pioneer Courthouse Square, watch the Max trains go by and give tourists bad directions.
Occasionally lob smoke bombs at the Portland Spirit dinner cruise.

You're my hereo whiteskunk!! Good to see you back here again. How have things been these days?

Frustrated with a certain website. I've been downloading, ahem "borrowed" anime before the site admins remove it. Sadly most is subtitled.

That and doing tons of paper work. . .licensing (new truck and a small boat). Battling the evil forces of my health and car insurance companies. Watching my turn more and more gray. In other words, same old, same old.

I've also been have a bit of fun doing stuff like this-