unconventional insult thread

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auntblabby
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23 Nov 2015, 3:27 am

that is unconventionally conventional.

KyleTheGhost
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23 Nov 2015, 3:15 pm

You are a Whammy from Press Your Luck.

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auntblabby
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23 Nov 2015, 6:11 pm

you are pressed ham. :pig:

AnonymousAnonymous
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23 Nov 2015, 9:05 pm

You enjoy arresting people who follow a strict vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free diet.

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auntblabby
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23 Nov 2015, 9:11 pm

you enjoy arresting the resting

Kiprobalhato
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24 Nov 2015, 1:29 am

you were made with parts created in a facility that processes tree nuts, and as a result have to carry a warning with you at all times.

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הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.

auntblabby
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24 Nov 2015, 1:36 am

you were assembled in a lone factory worker's spare time during his lunch break.

Kiprobalhato
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24 Nov 2015, 1:48 am

your hair is, in fact, an undescribed and uncatalogued species of coral that one of the assembly line workers ripped off the ocean floor and haphazardly glued to your head at the last minute.

_________________
הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.

auntblabby
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24 Nov 2015, 1:53 am

some of your brain components are from "B" stock, perfectly functional but "cosmetically imperfect."

KyleTheGhost
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24 Nov 2015, 4:30 pm

You scream like a human.

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Edenthiel
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24 Nov 2015, 6:53 pm

Your breath smells like the meat by-product that gets trucked out of chicken processing plants in open top bucket-trucks.

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Brittniejoy1983
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24 Nov 2015, 11:05 pm

CalicoCat wrote:

I have a mug with Shakespeare's greatest insults on it.

My favorite is "I do desire that we may be better strangers"

Mine are two from Much Ado About Nothing:

Beatrice: Scratching could not make it worse an ’twere such a face as
yours were.

Benedict: I would my horse had the speed of your tongue and so good
a continuer.

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Aspie Quiz: 148 ND/50 NT
AQ: 41 (AQ-10: 9) EQ: 17 SQ: 31 FQ: 44 RAADS-R: 178
ASD Diagnosed 4/22/2016

auntblabby
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24 Nov 2015, 11:51 pm

^^^ :wtg:

Kiprobalhato
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25 Nov 2015, 2:41 am

on the opposite of your left knee resides a button, that when pressed causes all raccoons in a 55 mile radius to refuse an offer of a paid vacation to see stonehenge.

_________________
הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.

auntblabby
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25 Nov 2015, 2:47 am

when you press a pencil eraser down onto your right eardrum, it resets your brain.

Kiprobalhato
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25 Nov 2015, 3:15 am

your pancreas is incompatible with most modern versions of windows.

_________________
הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.

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