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Cornflake
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14 Jul 2024, 9:37 am

Hamsters can be used as trumpets.

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DuckHairback
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14 Jul 2024, 9:53 am

And vice versa.

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auntblabby
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14 Jul 2024, 10:30 pm

trumpets were invented by donald j. trump, and strumpets were invented by guitar-playing gerbils.

Cornflake
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15 Jul 2024, 6:28 am

Margaret Thatcher traded in beech logs.

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DuckHairback
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15 Jul 2024, 12:09 pm

I very briefly held the world record for the longest gasp. A lady who witnessed my triumph was so shocked that her own gasp exceeded mine by by four seconds.

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DuckHairback
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15 Jul 2024, 2:15 pm

^To give that lie a happier ending I should note that I was so disappointed to lose that record so swiftly I let out the world's longest sigh.

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Cornflake
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15 Jul 2024, 4:14 pm

A good coating of gloss paint makes you completely invisible.

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IsabellaLinton
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15 Jul 2024, 4:51 pm

I'm on my way for Zillah.

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utterly absurd
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15 Jul 2024, 5:56 pm

Beginning this fall, I plan to start growing a third arm. It is projected to be ready for use in 2027.

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IsabellaLinton
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15 Jul 2024, 8:28 pm

I just had an uplifting chat with my exbf who didn't try to manipulate and guilt me at all.

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Cornflake
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16 Jul 2024, 6:59 am

Julie Andrews has two stuffed polar bears named Ermintrude and Midgely.

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babybird
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16 Jul 2024, 7:43 am

I love christmas cake me

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Rossall
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16 Jul 2024, 7:47 am

I love beetroot, licqorice allsorts and dandelion and burdock. And the sound of polystyrene rubbing together.

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16 Jul 2024, 8:38 am

Mmmmmm dandelion and birdmuck my favourite

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DuckHairback
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16 Jul 2024, 8:39 am

If you pull birds legs their beaks open reflexively.

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Cornflake
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16 Jul 2024, 11:50 am

^ :lol:

Archimedes wore an aqualung.

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