What's on your mind right now?
I found this video to be quite helpful & insightful..
I think I'm probably trans considering I've had the feelings of being male/masculine and aversion to being female/feminine since I was 7 and before that didn't feel anything about girl or boy. But I don't want an op because I'm a sissy. I hate hospitals and would never have an op unless I needed one to save my life. My granddad is the same. He almost died over that fear of hospitals.
Mum is annoying in how weird she's acting then when I say 'why are you acting like that' she says 'because I love you' and my stepdad says 'she always acts like that'. No she doesn't always talk in a sing song voice and try to hug me. It's annoying. I'm a masculine adult, don't treat me like a little girl.
She is pretending it's for no reason but it's definitely because of Rob... How could it not be? She's heard something since Friday.
I'm refusing to talk about the whole confusion/mess which is me and him online. Pretty hard considering he's all I've been thinking about since Friday.
Friday, Friday, Friday lol.
I'm watching the really bad snowstorm outside while I'm at work, wondering how bad the roads will be when I'm able to leave and lamenting the fact that I could not take my usual walk outside today because of the impassible streets. The treadmill at home is better than nothing so I'm grateful for that. I'll just need to force myself to get my 10,000 steps indoors today....
I have a friend since childhood and I don't think he has ever asked that question, hmm. So how are you?
my dad (prob had autism) never asked folks how they are because he felt inadequate in handling any response other than "fine."
I'm learning about LINETS Syndrome, which stands for Love Interest Not Essential To Story Syndrome.
_________________
There are plenty of ladies like that now n even more back then.
_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill
CockneyRebel
Veteran
Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 121,233
Location: In my own little country
There are plenty of ladies like that now n even more back then.
If I were Mike I'd have a word or two with her.
_________________
I never give you my number, I only give you my situation.
Beatles
Suspicious
Cynical
Wry
Angry
Some things should go without saying.
Ghetto lil riffraff keep trying to sell me drugs. It's like, wtf? Do I look like a drug dealer
Drugs could "help" me feel better
Medical marijuana
But $$$$ and addictive and do not want to interact with ghetto lil riffraff
Feel like society overvalues
happiness
Happy is an emotion. It's not a catastrophe if you are not happy
Entitled lil dips**ts truly believe that they have a moral right to get and do whatever they want, to be happy. For example, "you make people uncomfortable with the way you dress
". But I also make people uncomfortable when I continue living. Mister redelings implied that unless I commit suicide, "you do not care about anyone except yourself!"
But he's not going to be obsessed with how he was homophobic. He's not thinking about this s**t 13 years later
Idiots act like they have never done anything wrong before in their lives
Makes it hard to trust anyone
Splitting fine hairs
It stopped before getting to the 'sticks and stones, weed and bones part https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh4weSLztd0&t=1s ..love it when songs are done with the insertion of movie scenes.
Hope you feel better soon. Don’t worry about Mr Redelings,
I constantly think about the lawyer even now just a few minutez ago as a bad habit,
and how he yelled at n misled me and lied to me too, and it never does me any good. It just weakens me more.
Some ppl are prone to hurting others inadvertently.
Those people never reflect on their actions hurting others like you say
they think being ‘bada**’ is the best way to live. That includes trampling on others anf shrugging it off and carrying on.
Maybd thinking of them as a different species like foxes or otters wd be helpful
I think I am a badger (as my little sister said I look like a badger(
Badgers also like to be alone
Then I tell mysekf the law clerk is a wolf
Because she looks like one (beautiful but vicious or predatory )
And the lawyer was an Iguana (based on the vibes they gave me and rhe way they looked anf acted)
Or a Komodo dragon sometimes
So i tell myself OBVIOUSLY when a
Wolf, Iguana/Komodo Dragon, and a mere Badger collide,
the BADGER is The one who will be hurt /attacked
Maybe mr Redelings was a weasel or a snake or tiger or something else that has no business being near someone like you
(just imagine which animal suits ur nature best)
_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill
Trying and failing to repress and suppress. Diversion. Insufficient.
I constantly think about the lawyer even now just a few minutez ago as a bad habit,
and how he yelled at n misled me and lied to me too, and it never does me any good. It just weakens me more.
You could have fired the lawyer. You are the consumer.
Some ppl are prone to hurting others inadvertently.
Everything is helping, neither or hurting. You can't guarantee just the first two. "Helping" is not always deserving Purple Heart Award. "Hurting," does not always require 5150.
Everyone could say that anything "hurt" them. "Hurt" sounds bad. But too vague.
For example, I "hurt," mister redelings' eyeballs with my wrongful clothes and hair
Those people never reflect on their actions hurting others like you say
Everyone hurts people. And it is for the recipient to say if it "hurt".
Carbon footprint
Living things have to hurt other living things to remain alive
they think being ‘bada**’ is the best way to live. That includes trampling on others anf shrugging it off and carrying on.
Maybd thinking of them as a different species like foxes or otters wd be helpful
I think I am a badger (as my little sister said I look like a badger(
Badgers also like to be alone
Then I tell mysekf the law clerk is a wolf
Because she looks like one (beautiful but vicious or predatory )
And the lawyer was an Iguana (based on the vibes they gave me and rhe way they looked anf acted)
Or a Komodo dragon sometimes
So i tell myself OBVIOUSLY when a
Wolf, Iguana/Komodo Dragon, and a mere Badger collide,
the BADGER is The one who will be hurt /attacked
Maybe mr Redelings was a weasel or a snake or tiger or something else that has no business being near someone like you
He correctly told me that I dialed his phone number. Not vice versa
That is a good point
Anyways there are a lot of precious lil "people" just like him
For example Jeanne Courtney
When you make statements and actions that they do not care about or like, they are
The second you do or say something they do not like, it's like
(just imagine which animal suits ur nature best)
The problem is the emotional attachment that I made to him
But you don't know which lil dips**t is going to betray you, a prioriti.
Unless you are precognitive or telepathic
Freud stage "trust versus mistrust".
The best case scenario is
The worst case scenario is subject to imagination
Adrenal fatigue
As an introvert autistic, I do not have enough energy or IQ to win competitions with entitled lil dips**ts. Even when I have the moral high road
Lil ass holes outsmart, overpower, outnumber me
How easy would it be for any one of the ass holes from San Diego to write me a letter of apology.
When they thought they were correct, they acted "holier than thou"
When it turned out that I was right, not even
Mister redelings is in the majority
Skinny smart handsome cisgender neurotypical white man
He has no problem with Global Area Functioning as homophobic
LGBT people have a disadvantage at GAF. And it is not their fault
Trying not to worry about mister redelings
Maslow's hierarchy
"Here and now" mantra
Trying and failing
Worry about:. Work, hobby, friends
Do not worry about:. Things outside Maslow's hierarchy
Trying and failing
I wish you wd get a trudtworthy mentor who didnt hurt you then u wd be able to forget mr redelings
The same thing with me i really trusted n thought of that man as a priest of integrity n honesty
n the one person who cared about my kids which my XH didnt really at that time n who was smart and did not have any hidden motives except to make money but even that wasnt really a motive since he was richer than anyone (i thought)
i thought he wd save us frm the bad stuff n guide us (and he did fr some time somewhat)
then he purposely exacerbated n didnt help even when i told him what was happening n yelled at me n so on (as u can understand) n then i found out he had actually lied
So I understand
I wish u wd find a person who wd help n not have any bad reactions
Maybe someone whose whole work is to help n counsel LGBTq ppl
then u know straight away that theu will not betray that or malign you
_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill
