ScarletIbis
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Joined: 10 Aug 2017
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 457
Location: Between Two Speakers
30 Nov 2017, 10:36 pm
My mom was holding my cousins’ kitten and he sneezed while she had her mouth open... if you get what I am hinting at 
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,217
Location: the island of defective toy santas
30 Nov 2017, 10:53 pm
01 Dec 2017, 10:26 am
Oh, that snot funny at all.
02 Dec 2017, 3:21 am
Courtesy of theguardian.com's fashion and grooming section -
"The other significant Hollywood moment in the recent history of male chest hair (not that I keep lists of this kind of thing) is the scene in Casino Royale in 2006, when Daniel Craig emerges from the sea in a tight pair of trunks, as hairless as a hammerhead shark – or Ursula Andress. Women – and some men – swooned, other men shriveled, and we style-watchers noted that James Bond’s once brushable chest mat – as modeled by Sean Connery – was no more. In the 21st century, even 007 depilates."
That made me snigger at "not that I keep lists of this kind of thing."
Sure, keep telling yourself that. 
ScarletIbis
Velociraptor
Joined: 10 Aug 2017
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 457
Location: Between Two Speakers
02 Dec 2017, 6:24 pm
Oh, that snot funny at all.
Oh don’t worry, she thought it was funny too, after she rinsed her mouth out. My uncle thought it was downright hilarious.
08 Dec 2017, 8:39 pm
10 Dec 2017, 10:16 am
19 Dec 2017, 1:08 am
lostonearth35
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Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,880
Location: On a planet where I don't belong.
19 Dec 2017, 3:57 pm
Today I read a joke about how a common Christmas tradition got started:
Santa was feeling very cross. It was Christmas Eve and he would soon have to start delivering the toys, but everything had been going terribly wrong that day. First, Mrs. Claus burned the cookies she'd been baking. Then the elves, who were feeling overworked, all decided to go on strike. And the reindeer had been drinking eggnog all day and were now just dead drunk. What's worse, the reindeer had taken Santa's sleigh out for a spin earlier and crashed it against a tree. Santa was just beside himself. "I only have a few hours left before it's time to deliver the toys to billions of children all over the world and my elves are on strike, my reindeer are all drunk, my sleigh is smashed up, and that stupid little angel I sent out to get a Christmas tree hours ago still hasn't come back yet." Just then the door to Santa's workshop flew open and in came the angel, dragging a big bushy pine tree behind him. The angel asked Santa, "Yo, fat boy, where do ya want me to put this here tree?"
Santa told him exactly where to put it. In fact, Santa showed him. And that is how the tradition of putting little angels on top of Christmas trees began.
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,217
Location: the island of defective toy santas
20 Dec 2017, 10:09 am
20 Dec 2017, 10:14 am
lostonearth35
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Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,880
Location: On a planet where I don't belong.
06 Jan 2018, 12:45 am
This was last night but I was watching a video from a classic Bugs Bunny/Yosemite Sam cartoon that showed all the times Sam throws a tantrum when Bugs annoys him and "cusses" a blue streak, only its really mostly a bunch of nonsense words that *sound* like swearing, or "angrish", like "Rassinfrassincottonpickin'durnedblast!"
It's got to be one of my favorite Warner Bros. cartoons and seeing Sam doing this for one minute and five seconds made me laugh more than anything else has for ages.
Sweetleaf
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Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 35,278
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
06 Jan 2018, 3:52 am
This made me laugh I love it, Jeff Sessions, the evil Keebler Elf. 
Sweetleaf
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Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 35,278
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
06 Jan 2018, 4:12 am
Santa was feeling very cross. It was Christmas Eve and he would soon have to start delivering the toys, but everything had been going terribly wrong that day. First, Mrs. Claus burned the cookies she'd been baking. Then the elves, who were feeling overworked, all decided to go on strike. And the reindeer had been drinking eggnog all day and were now just dead drunk. What's worse, the reindeer had taken Santa's sleigh out for a spin earlier and crashed it against a tree. Santa was just beside himself. "I only have a few hours left before it's time to deliver the toys to billions of children all over the world and my elves are on strike, my reindeer are all drunk, my sleigh is smashed up, and that stupid little angel I sent out to get a Christmas tree hours ago still hasn't come back yet." Just then the door to Santa's workshop flew open and in came the angel, dragging a big bushy pine tree behind him. The angel asked Santa, "Yo, fat boy, where do ya want me to put this here tree?"
Santa told him exactly where to put it. In fact, Santa showed him. And that is how the tradition of putting little angels on top of Christmas trees began.
Lol I remember when my youngest brother was afraid of Santa, he saw the part of 'trading places' that showed the distraught rich character brandishing a gun while wearing a Santa costume, so he thought Santa was a crazy guy with a gun as he did not see the context of the movie. So he was actually scared about a visit from santa, so I tried to explain to him that was just a movie and whatever but in effect I think I indicated it was fake...so he knew early on it was all a falsehood.
06 Jan 2018, 9:58 am
25 Jan 2018, 5:02 pm
A video of dogs jumping into a swimming pool made me lol. 
