WP Addicts Anonymous

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Joined: 7 Jul 2014
Age: 126
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 34,629
Location: Out of my mind

16 Feb 2016, 6:25 am

I think we may be talking about two different things.
I don't think there's any hope for my condition.
I'm not depressed.
I'm quite happy, usually.
It's a ninja feeling that leads to these horrible meltdowns that makes me feel like I want to die - although I'm happy - I feel excruciating pain - I want to break - and self-harm - break pieces off of myself.
I can't describe it adequately :cry:

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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Age: 126
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16 Feb 2016, 6:43 am

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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16 Feb 2016, 6:59 am

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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16 Feb 2016, 7:08 am

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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Age: 126
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 34,629
Location: Out of my mind

16 Feb 2016, 7:13 am

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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16 Feb 2016, 3:16 pm

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,289
Location: the island of defective toy santas

16 Feb 2016, 3:39 pm

does what you have, have a name that at least you can point to?

Raleigh
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Joined: 7 Jul 2014
Age: 126
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 34,629
Location: Out of my mind

16 Feb 2016, 4:08 pm

Autistic meltdown?
Inability to regulate emotions?

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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Age: 126
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Posts: 34,629
Location: Out of my mind

16 Feb 2016, 4:19 pm

There is no cure for this.
If I don't self-harm they're much worse.
But self-harming is "bad".
So I feel guilty for having the meltdown and guilty for self-harming to ease it.
I can't win.

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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Age: 126
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Posts: 34,629
Location: Out of my mind

16 Feb 2016, 4:34 pm

_________________
It's like I'm sleepwalking

auntblabby
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Location: the island of defective toy santas

16 Feb 2016, 4:35 pm

a dumb question, but have you tried the rubber band trick?

Raleigh
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16 Feb 2016, 4:39 pm

Yes.

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auntblabby
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16 Feb 2016, 4:39 pm

can you tell me what you thought of it?

Raleigh
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Joined: 7 Jul 2014
Age: 126
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16 Feb 2016, 4:47 pm

Of the rubber band trick?
Not enough of a kick to do anything.
I have a high tolerance for pain.
Flicking a rubber band just makes me feel itchy, which is another annoyance.

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It's like I'm sleepwalking

Raleigh
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Joined: 7 Jul 2014
Age: 126
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 34,629
Location: Out of my mind

16 Feb 2016, 4:52 pm

Someone stood on my foot yesterday.
I didn't even react.
It's like it doesn't even register.
I was more concerned about the proximity of the person than him standing on my foot.

I was stabbed in the thigh by a client years ago and I didn't even flinch.

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Amity
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Posts: 7,714
Location: Meandering

16 Feb 2016, 5:00 pm

^Running/exercising until every muscle is fatigued?

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