Excuse me.. does this haircut make me look gay?
goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
lol Really? Coloured hair makes you steer clear of people? Odd.
Psychedelic conversations do tend to happen sometimes, though.. but usually with like minded people from the beach/parties etc.
It's a 6 colour rainbow for Pride. This was my 2nd Pride. I never used to do things like this, but after spending a year of my time defending myself at the BC Human Rights Tribunal against a homophobe's fabricated allegations of verbal sexual harassment, gay rights stuff began to have some meaning to me and I decided to get on board the Pride party train and have some fun with my fellow homos.
The attention has been 99% positive. Party hair is an instant invitation to any party or conversation. People just love it. So many people stopped me to take pictures of me or with me. Chances are there will be some out there on the internet, besides this one, where I'm wearing.. less - underwear and glitter lol. The 1% negative was some rude homophobic comments from a road rager that chased my car in his truck and then we both got out of our vehicles and had words with each other.. I told him if he hit me I was going to tear him apart. He asked "you think so?" and I replied I KNOW so." and he got back in his truck and left. Even that negative attention is valuable. It reminds me what my "obviously gay" friends go through on a daily basis their whole lives vs. this temporary time of wearing my sexual orientation as a hairstyle for all to see.
_________________
No
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,260
Location: the island of defective toy santas
lol Really? Coloured hair makes you steer clear of people? Odd.
people who change their appearances for the sake of image projection seem to me to be prone to self absorption, and since i am not interested in other people's sagas much, i avoid them.
there are whacky minded people who think they are unique everywhere. if you got into a pair of roller skates and skated on santa monica pier in los angeles, you would just blend into the white noise of them all. they all are absorbed by their image and what they want to project.
"all the world is a stage" did say shakespeare.
The attention has been 99% positive. Party hair is an instant invitation to any party or conversation. People just love it. So many people stopped me to take pictures of me or with me. Chances are there will be some out there on the internet, besides this one, where I'm wearing.. less - underwear and glitter lol. The 1% negative was some rude homophobic comments from a road rager that chased my car in his truck and then we both got out of our vehicles and had words with each other.. I told him if he hit me I was going to tear him apart. He asked "you think so?" and I replied I KNOW so." and he got back in his truck and left. Even that negative attention is valuable. It reminds me what my "obviously gay" friends go through on a daily basis their whole lives vs. this temporary time of wearing my sexual orientation as a hairstyle for all to see.
i do not know why you are "proud" to be gay. is is better somehow than being straight? there are gay people who call straight people "common breeders" and they look upon them with scorn too. who gives a s**t?
why do gay people wipe it in the faces of straight people like people waving their dirty underpants around just for the shock value?
i mean straight people don't go on about how straight they are. no one ever thinks about it.
but gay people seem to be absorbed with this "let's shock the straights, and also try to guilt trip them" thing.
at least the militant gays are.
i have nothing to comment on about your transcript of your violent confrontation, but you do say "obviously gay", and that makes me think they flaunt it.
straight people do not flaunt their straightness and wipe it in the faces of society at large.
if you mean "obviously gay" in the sense that they prance as they walk and do that limp wrist thing and talk in their accent and also do all that strenuously in society, some people (who are idiots i agree) will take exception.
one thing i am curious about is where the gay accent comes from. there is no language spoken in the world where that accent would be the accent of a native speaker of that language talking english.
you never hear small kids talking that way. teenagers suddenly develop that way of speaking no doubt by influence and at that age, it is sure that they adopt their way of talking with emphasis on image rather than content.
whatever.
goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
lol Really? Coloured hair makes you steer clear of people? Odd.
people who change their appearances for the sake of image projection seem to me to be prone to self absorption, and since i am not interested in other people's sagas much, i avoid them.
there are whacky minded people who think they are unique everywhere. if you got into a pair of roller skates and skated on santa monica pier in los angeles, you would just blend into the white noise of them all. they all are absorbed by their image and what they want to project.
"all the world is a stage" did say shakespeare.
The attention has been 99% positive. Party hair is an instant invitation to any party or conversation. People just love it. So many people stopped me to take pictures of me or with me. Chances are there will be some out there on the internet, besides this one, where I'm wearing.. less - underwear and glitter lol. The 1% negative was some rude homophobic comments from a road rager that chased my car in his truck and then we both got out of our vehicles and had words with each other.. I told him if he hit me I was going to tear him apart. He asked "you think so?" and I replied I KNOW so." and he got back in his truck and left. Even that negative attention is valuable. It reminds me what my "obviously gay" friends go through on a daily basis their whole lives vs. this temporary time of wearing my sexual orientation as a hairstyle for all to see.
i do not know why you are "proud" to be gay. is is better somehow than being straight? there are gay people who call straight people "common breeders" and they look upon them with scorn too. who gives a s**t?
why do gay people wipe it in the faces of straight people like people waving their dirty underpants around just for the shock value?
i mean straight people don't go on about how straight they are. no one ever thinks about it.
but gay people seem to be absorbed with this "let's shock the straights, and also try to guilt trip them" thing.
at least the militant gays are.
i have nothing to comment on about your transcript of your violent confrontation, but you do say "obviously gay", and that makes me think they flaunt it.
straight people do not flaunt their straightness and wipe it in the faces of society at large.
if you mean "obviously gay" in the sense that they prance as they walk and do that limp wrist thing and talk in their accent and also do all that strenuously in society, some people (who are idiots i agree) will take exception.
one thing i am curious about is where the gay accent comes from. there is no language spoken in the world where that accent would be the accent of a native speaker of that language talking english.
you never hear small kids talking that way. teenagers suddenly develop that way of speaking no doubt by influence and at that age, it is sure that they adopt their way of talking with emphasis on image rather than content.
whatever.
You're usually a pretty level headed and balanced poster, but this post is full of assumptions and misinformation.
I'm not self absorbed, thanks. Far from it. It's about a human rights statement as well as being very visibly a member of the lgbt community for the attention that brings, both good and bad, for the experience that yields. Otherwise I'm pretty invisible as I don't "look" or act "gay."
Why shouldn't people be proud to be what & who they are? We (gays) exist and aren't going to go hide in a closet like it's the 1950's. I have nothing against straight people whatsoever.. without them there wouldn't be anymore cute gay boys. It's not about shocking "the straights" so much as it is about shocking homophobes and hateful people. Plus the whole flaunting everything during Pride is about freedom of sexual expression. After all, it IS about sex, so, some people choose to celebrate and show off their particular brand of whatever "sexy," is to them. Again, it's just a statement about them existing in contrast to the common norms.
"Obviously gay," does Not mean they flaunt it. It means they're "gay"/effeminate and cannot conceal their sexual orientation if they tried. I'm sure you've met a gay man and just KNOWN he was gay. Those people. They're the ones who endure gay bashing and bullying their entire lives. I feel for them. At least I've had the option of camouflaging into the heteronormative society when I don't want to be "visibly gay."
Except EVERY other day of the year is "straight pride" day.. in public, in the media etc. Public displays of affection, even simple things like holding hands, hugging, or kissing etc. Straight couples on TV and in movies, photos etc. It's a hetero-normative society out there and you don't notice it because you're part of it.
I have no idea where the stereotypical "gay accent" comes from, but based on your observation of it's onset at puberty I'd imagine it must be hormone induced. Perhaps a bit too much estrogen or not enough testosterone? Something like that must trigger that change in a male's voice just as most guys' voices get deeper with age.
_________________
No
trivia time! ![]()
it's a sociolect:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sociolect
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/ ... ay_accent/
probably developed originally through emulation of flamboyant women (conspicuous stereotypical attributes of a "non-man", which in binary terms would be "a woman", by association of each gender with the gender it's generally attracted to). it's one of the ways how members of a subculture identify each other, which is self-reinforcing, which becomes ingrained as personal identity for some who identify with the subculture. the "onset age" happens because adolescence is the period when people generally acquire group identity through peer pressure and/or reaction against it
of course, that's only a "gay subculture" thing, not really a "homosexual" thing. the association between one thing and the other is largely cultural, if not entirely. from personal experience and all the fuzzy information i've gathered over the years, i assume most gays worldwide don't actually identify with that subculture. probably not even in "western" countries where the subculture is trendy even among heteros nowadays
------
answering the original question: yes, it looks extremely gay
to be honest, i would keep my distance as well (i just wouldn't be as emphatic about it as b9...
but then again, it's not like i'm in any way your target audience with your hairstyle. if anything, for your purposes, my aversion to it is probably a good sign
lol Really? Coloured hair makes you steer clear of people? Odd.
people who change their appearances for the sake of image projection seem to me to be prone to self absorption, and since i am not interested in other people's sagas much, i avoid them.
there are whacky minded people who think they are unique everywhere. if you got into a pair of roller skates and skated on santa monica pier in los angeles, you would just blend into the white noise of them all. they all are absorbed by their image and what they want to project.
"all the world is a stage" did say shakespeare.
The attention has been 99% positive. Party hair is an instant invitation to any party or conversation. People just love it. So many people stopped me to take pictures of me or with me. Chances are there will be some out there on the internet, besides this one, where I'm wearing.. less - underwear and glitter lol. The 1% negative was some rude homophobic comments from a road rager that chased my car in his truck and then we both got out of our vehicles and had words with each other.. I told him if he hit me I was going to tear him apart. He asked "you think so?" and I replied I KNOW so." and he got back in his truck and left. Even that negative attention is valuable. It reminds me what my "obviously gay" friends go through on a daily basis their whole lives vs. this temporary time of wearing my sexual orientation as a hairstyle for all to see.
i do not know why you are "proud" to be gay. is is better somehow than being straight? there are gay people who call straight people "common breeders" and they look upon them with scorn too. who gives a s**t?
why do gay people wipe it in the faces of straight people like people waving their dirty underpants around just for the shock value?
i mean straight people don't go on about how straight they are. no one ever thinks about it.
but gay people seem to be absorbed with this "let's shock the straights, and also try to guilt trip them" thing.
at least the militant gays are.
i have nothing to comment on about your transcript of your violent confrontation, but you do say "obviously gay", and that makes me think they flaunt it.
straight people do not flaunt their straightness and wipe it in the faces of society at large.
if you mean "obviously gay" in the sense that they prance as they walk and do that limp wrist thing and talk in their accent and also do all that strenuously in society, some people (who are idiots i agree) will take exception.
one thing i am curious about is where the gay accent comes from. there is no language spoken in the world where that accent would be the accent of a native speaker of that language talking english.
you never hear small kids talking that way. teenagers suddenly develop that way of speaking no doubt by influence and at that age, it is sure that they adopt their way of talking with emphasis on image rather than content.
whatever.
You're usually a pretty level headed and balanced poster, but this post is full of assumptions and misinformation.
I'm not self absorbed, thanks. Far from it. It's about a human rights statement as well as being very visibly a member of the lgbt community for the attention that brings, both good and bad, for the experience that yields. Otherwise I'm pretty invisible as I don't "look" or act "gay."
well you look like you are gay to me with that haircut and the pink glasses, and you also talk gay stuff in many posts of yours.
they will die out eventually anyway, and maybe you will be too old by then, but just why be so confrontational to such a small impediment to your placidity?
what? hairdressers, fashion designers, perfume creators, flight stewards, and many other professions are considered to be gay ones. everyone likes gay people if they meet them. you just seem to sense every tiny crack in the tapestry of societal appreciation and wedge yourself into it as an activist. forget it. it does not mean anything worthy of consideration.
it's a sociolect:
probably developed originally through emulation of flamboyant women
so what accounts for the fake lisp in many of them. whatever i am not really a philosophical person and i could not care much about what social influences craft the accents of gay people.
lesbians all talk normally. they do not talk like men mainly. that is a curious fact worthy of comparison to the male counterpart.....
who knows. once a linguistic split happens, the new linguistic variety keeps developing with a certain level of independence, interwoven with the culture it's associated with
i speculate it's because of two main factors:
1. women have always (or for a very long time) been expected to interact closely with other women in ways that men are specifically expected not to, which allow them to convey affection and innuendo, and even, well, sex. that means homosexual women don't need conspicuous means of identification as much as homosexual men do
2. women together with other women are sexy (research suggests that finding lesbian porn attractive is statistically the most reliable predictor of male heterosexuality). and men have historically been dominant in society. that means it takes a more extreme kind of fanatic subculture to hate lesbians, which means less reason for a more sharply-defined subculture as a means of self-affirmation
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,260
Location: the island of defective toy santas
who knows. once a linguistic split happens, the new linguistic variety keeps developing with a certain level of independence, interwoven with the culture it's associated with
i speculate it's because of two main factors:
1. women have always (or for a very long time) been expected to interact closely with other women in ways that men are specifically expected not to, which allow them to convey affection and innuendo, and even, well, sex. that means homosexual women don't need conspicuous means of identification as much as homosexual men do
2. women together with other women are sexy (research suggests that finding lesbian porn attractive is statistically the most reliable predictor of male heterosexuality). and men have historically been dominant in society. that means it takes a more extreme kind of fanatic subculture to hate lesbians, which means less reason for a more sharply-defined subculture as a means of self-affirmation
can you tell me why there has to be "butch" and "femme" among lesbians?
there has to be? i don't really get the context of your question. you mean the reason why those stereotypes evolved? if that's what you mean, then i suppose it's the same reasons as their homosexual male counterparts. the difference is a matter of degree and prevalence. different people will have different tastes when it comes to attraction, and then cultural forces sometimes amplify those natural preferences and turn them into more widely recognized (and adopted) stereotypes
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,260
Location: the island of defective toy santas
there has to be? i don't really get the context of your question. you mean the reason why those stereotypes evolved? if that's what you mean, then i suppose it's the same reasons as their homosexual male counterparts. the difference is a matter of degree and prevalence. different people will have different tastes when it comes to attraction, and then cultural forces sometimes amplify those natural preferences and turn them into more widely recognized (and adopted) stereotypes
please excuse my clumsy expression, I was referring to how every lesbian couple I saw, consisted of one that seemed hyperfeminine and one as quasi-masculine as they could be, had not seen any that that not have at least a taste of that pattern. are you saying that male gay couples are like that also?
well, my ex, for one, is "extremely bi" (afaict she's more often attracted to women than to men). she's not masculine at all, and she's attracted to women who "look like regular women". or, broadly speaking, "the same type of women i'm attracted to as well". which btw makes any relationship more fun
i think everything goes when it comes to flings, but stable couples will generally have a tendency to either develop a sort of gender-like polarization or be formed based on that polarization to begin with. i think that much is universal, not even just a homosexual thing. someone will be "the sensitive one", for instance. or something more or less like that
who knows. once a linguistic split happens, the new linguistic variety keeps developing with a certain level of independence, interwoven with the culture it's associated with
i speculate it's because of two main factors:
1. women have always (or for a very long time) been expected to interact closely with other women in ways that men are specifically expected not to, which allow them to convey affection and innuendo, and even, well, sex. that means homosexual women don't need conspicuous means of identification as much as homosexual men do
2. women together with other women are sexy (research suggests that finding lesbian porn attractive is statistically the most reliable predictor of male heterosexuality). and men have historically been dominant in society. that means it takes a more extreme kind of fanatic subculture to hate lesbians, which means less reason for a more sharply-defined subculture as a means of self-affirmation
that is all speculation really.
male speculation in particular.
"women together are sexy" you say. but what makes that an empirical fact except for analysis which is impossible to perform based in conjecture.
i really don't care much for this discussion because i am just a hermit in a house and i want to do something else.
it is. which is why i enunciate it as such
yet you are still responding
you're having a bad hair day today, aren't you?
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,260
Location: the island of defective toy santas
I will admit that I find that to be a depressing thing to me, I mean why can't two people as a couple, be equal? like two peas in a pod? I suppose that is a naïve overexpectation of human nature. if I was in a relationship i'd want somebody a lot like myself, I cannot be the only one with that expectation.
| Similar Topics | |
|---|---|
| Is it weird I feel I'm not meant to make friends? |
12 Jul 2026, 2:22 am |
| Late diagnosed, high-masking female, looking to make friends |
18 Jul 2026, 6:16 pm |

