Talk like a pirate thread

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Arr. Ye be needin some Pepto Bismol. Thar be lead in yer guts now. You'll have trouble fitting into yer old pants. Arrr.

Yarrr, everthin else be mixed up in me head, why not this as well? I be postin this Letter of Marque in th' Invasion of WP thread too, mateys. It be from th real thing, writ in 1667. Arr, who knew thar be a pirate documents website?

http://www.piratedocuments.com/index.htm

Break open a keg boys? Free flowin rootbeer tonight!

The Community to all and singular Admirals &c., Greeting.
Know ye that we have granted and given to our well-beloved Alex and Nuttdan, masters of a certain site called Wrong Planet, liberty to equip in the port of the World Wide Web, at their own charges, the aforesaid site with as many administrators, moderators, and volunteers as shall be necessary for their navigation and defence on the internet against our enemies, whosoever they may be, and for subduing, capturing, and destroying the same; and liberty to set forth with the same site, so equipped, upon the internet for the purpose aforesaid. And we will that whatsoever they, Alex and Nuttdan, succeed in winning, gaining, and having by capture from our enemies aforesaid, they may have and keep for their own proper use, without claim or hindrance by or from us, or our heirs or ministers, or the ministers of any of our heirs whatsoever. Provided always that under color of this license they, Alex and Nuttdan, their administrators, moderators, and volunteers aforesaid, neither do nor permit to be done any violence, hindrance, or hurt to any who are in friendship with us.

Witness the Asperger’s Community
on the 14th day of June, Two Thousand and Four.

Arrr.

Mad Jack Kidd be postin this in the Invasion thread now.

YUMMM!! ! that be might tasteful! yarrr! i be takin' mine with blueberries too! alll the blueberries 'tis Vetivert can't seem to handle, yarrr!

btw, why be us girls gettin' sent to the cuddy and the mateys getting the hold!? 'tis doth not sound fair to mine fair girly ears, yerrrrrrrrrrr!

Arrrr! The Rhyming Red Rover be back on the clock, after jumping ship early to go see the doc;
The pancakes I made have all gotten cold, the blueberry gunpowder's now much too old;
I can't seem to find any stowed tasty eats, let's raid a supply ship and plunder their treats;
But eatin' me cannon ball, that's certainly rude, you didn't even ask, it's not even food;
So here have another and one more to boot, I have them all loaded and primed up, now SHOOT!
So this be the life, of pirates of old, now hoist the mainsail, lets go find some gold!

Arrrr! Rootbeer, I had me some last night. Arrrr!

yarrr! cold pancakes be yummy!! !

Arrrr! I be servin' ya up cold pancakes then, just don't come whining to me when the unstable blueberry gunpowder stirs up in yer innards and blows yer knickers off. Arrrr! I won't be cleanin up after ya either.

Arrrr! SquanderedPotential's avatar be our new mascott. It be the means to conquer our enemies! ARRRR When the yell be heard to hold up the mascott, then, arrr, hold up the mascott fer the enemy to gaze upon. Arrr! The moment they go AWWWW (as opposed to ARRR) and smile, we will lash them with our swords and feed 'em to the sharks. Then we will plunder their booty and feast on pancakes and cannon balls. Arrr!

Arrr! No wonder I be cook and not chief tactical officer.


Yo ho ho and a can of frosty mug rootbeer!

Chief Tactical Officer? Ey what this be? Star Trek?

Star Trek: Pirates

"Yarr! Warp Speed! There be Klingons!"
"Of course there be cling ons cap'n, we haven't had a showa' in days."
"Yarr! Shut up, and fire the torpedos, ya smelly bunch!"
"But Cap'n, that would be breakin' the Mostest important directive."
"Arr, who be askin' you, ya pointy eared freak!?"




GA

Arrr! But I'm just a cook.

Arrr! Sometimes me Heisenberg compensators don't quite overcome the Heisenberg uncertainty principle.

oi! trekkie interlopers off the starboard bow! get 'em, lads!

/me blasts all vestiges of trekkie-dom out of the water.

and never darken these seas again, ye futuristic dargs!

and who be these godforsaken whelps 'oo call 'emselves buccaneers a-wearin' o' knickers? the sharks round here'll be eatin' well this even, i can feel it in me bones...

Oi! Lay orf da Trekkies!

GArrr

No.

bugger off back to yer own thread.

Me own thread? Where be that?

GA

an' how would i be knowin' that, being not of the trekkie breed, yer scurvy spaceman?

anyway - i've just blown you to smithereens, so you can choose any o' the hundred and fifty threads ye'll be landin' in.

(maybe ye'll land on them cold pancakes they're all obsessing over... )

Arrr! She be tryin' to kill the cook. How will we ever conquer the Spanish and then retire in Bermuda if she keeps killin' us scurvy dogs?

Arrr! Time fer a sea chanty.

She come from the south seas with fire in her eyes,
No man has befriended her and no man even tries;
She chews them up like gunpowder and spits them into flame,
She's the vixen of the south seas and dreadful be her name.

Fire up yer muskets, arm yerselves with swords,
The vixen of the south seas, she come for her rewards;
She'll slash you all to pieces, then chop you up some more,
The vixen of the south seas, she come for her rewards.

ARRR! And what a sad sea chanty it was.


Copyright 2005 DeepThought - Unauthorized duplication prohibited by law. Violators will be turned over to vetivert fer a scourgin'.

Meh

What be good be good you be good good be ehmermerbehem....

... :: wanders off ::

GA (note to those playing at home: I actually said that to myself in composing this so I wrote it)