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30 minutes before assessment...time to start pacing.

Today is my dad's birthday, but he's still recovering in the hospital, as far as I know. My mom assured me that he will okay, and that he doesn't have covid, and when he is out of the hospital we will celebrate his birthday then. Meanwhile my brother is back home for the March Break and he will be be helping me out by taking me out grocery shopping today.

What sites and blogs says about routines: making habits.
Meditate, check emails, do appointments, grocery, chores, etc. How to abstain, when to have fun, etc. What to consume, what not to consume, etc.
Just straight to discipline and mindset, with a list of what and what not to do without a particular hierarchy or order or whatever explicit prerequisites.

What sites and blogs DO NOT say about routines: how important sleep times and meal times are.
Varying circadian rhythms, hormonal configurations and the unhealthy parasympathetic systems' states outside the able bodied neurotypical morning person cis-male norm.
How to even try to predict let alone flat out control the less predictable factors within the human system.


How many unspoken mid-steps do I have to discover for myself?!

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I've hashtagged 27 of my facebook posts as being about autism. I've spent a good deal of time on some of them. If you actually wanted to know me, these would be the posts to read. Duly noted who has reacted and who hasn't, lol.

i always seem to get on well with people that others dislike.
At work I was warned about a militant co-worker.
She usually doesn't like help with her job.
But she's given work over to me because she couldn't work out how to do it, whereas I could.
Her thinking is a bit too rigid,
Mine is more out of the box creatively.
We also have a lot of interests in common.
So everyone's amazed now that we're apparently best buds.

We are maybe getting a new dog.

I know what it's like for someone to help you out when it comes to those simple things people take for granted, such as grocery shopping. I appreciate my nice neighbors for the same reason.

I always ended up being one of those disliked ones when I was around others in group settings, albeit that'll be due to the lack of behaving as expected (lack of interaction there). Which is understandable.

I'd like a new dog, and I probably will get one at some point in time.

Every time I mention something, I always think of it again in full and it hits harder. That'll be one of the reasons why I never do. It's different when I'd talk to it with my mother, as I guess I saw her as a nightlight, as embarrassing as that one is to admit. But then, that's what parents and similar should be, so not really embarrassing.

mom's controlling the corridors with the pc whip

Suddenly, girls and women with long enough hair are cutting their hair in a bob or something closer.

Many of them, I never saw with a shorter hair than past shoulder length or hadn't been one since as a child.


At least my mom hasn't.
Last I saw her with that short of a hair was from a photograph before I could remember what she looked like at all.

Maybe because they had the same idea as I do; summer will be too hot.

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I've experienced so many unspoken missteps, I've lost all embarrassment. I like Edison's thought about it's a thousand successful experiments that each eliminate a variable to achieve the goal. Or sumthing.

Wondering why I decided to repeatably smash the edge of a far too expensive knife into a rock to see how well the tool steel held up. Oh well, at least it's easy to fix, even if it'll lose some millimeters of edge. I'm wincing watching the video I took of it.