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Raleigh
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30 Jan 2018, 10:54 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
Autistic alert

i was in the hardware store and they had these black, fake fur rugs, and I'm a sucker for fur so I was stuck there running my hands through it.
A female assistant asked me if I needed any help and I replied, "No thanks, I'm just stroking your rug."
She kind of giggled and the male shop assistant behind her started laughing.
Then I realised I'd told her I was stroking her rug, and that could have another meaning.
so I walked off, flapping my hands.


Good job you don't like to munch on things for stimulation

I do sometimes. :oops:


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B19
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30 Jan 2018, 10:55 pm

Raleigh wrote:
^^ most of the feeling is back, except the bits that are permanent, like in my lower leg and foot.
I should have explained that this isn't the first time it's happened, I've been hospitalised for it twice.
The first time they put me in stroke rehab for 3 days, which wasn't much fun, the second time it was only overnight.
It seems like it's just one of those things that's part and parcel of everything else.


My brother experienced very similar things. It looked like a stroke but it wasn't. He had the same illness but lived much longer than they thought he would, and I think you have more of a spirit of survival than he did, and youth on your side, (relative to him). Your spirit generally is a remarkably bouyant and courageous one.



SaveFerris
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30 Jan 2018, 10:56 pm

Raleigh wrote:
^^ most of the feeling is back, except the bits that are permanent, like in my lower leg and foot.
I should have explained that this isn't the first time it's happened, I've been hospitalised for it twice.
The first time they put me in stroke rehab for 3 days, which wasn't much fun, the second time it was only overnight.
It seems like it's just one of those things that's part and parcel of everything else.


Stroke rehab ? Is that you cause you stroke too many rugs.

Sorry bad taste joke.

Have you actually had a stroke ? that's messed up dude.


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ZZZTired
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30 Jan 2018, 11:01 pm

I think as an artist you gotta keep on going even though you can't impress the artists, critics, or audiences you wanted originally.

I think the person who should be impressed is yourself.



Raleigh
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30 Jan 2018, 11:02 pm

B19 wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
^^ most of the feeling is back, except the bits that are permanent, like in my lower leg and foot.
I should have explained that this isn't the first time it's happened, I've been hospitalised for it twice.
The first time they put me in stroke rehab for 3 days, which wasn't much fun, the second time it was only overnight.
It seems like it's just one of those things that's part and parcel of everything else.


My brother experienced very similar things. It looked like a stroke but it wasn't. He had the same illness but lived much longer than they thought he would, and I think you have more of a spirit of survival than he did, and youth on your side, (relative to him). Your spirit generally is a remarkably bouyant and courageous one.

I'm a depressed chicken, really.
Don't let the smokescreen fool you.


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Raleigh
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30 Jan 2018, 11:08 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
^^ most of the feeling is back, except the bits that are permanent, like in my lower leg and foot.
I should have explained that this isn't the first time it's happened, I've been hospitalised for it twice.
The first time they put me in stroke rehab for 3 days, which wasn't much fun, the second time it was only overnight.
It seems like it's just one of those things that's part and parcel of everything else.


Stroke rehab ? Is that you cause you stroke too many rugs.

Sorry bad taste joke.

Have you actually had a stroke ? that's messed up dude.

I've never had a stroke but the symptoms of GBM are exactly the same as stroke and a tumour can cause bleeding and pressure in the brain which makes it appear as if you're having a stroke.


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Last edited by Raleigh on 30 Jan 2018, 11:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Raleigh
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30 Jan 2018, 11:14 pm

I need fur stroking therapy, not fur stroking rehab. :wink:


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Raleigh
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30 Jan 2018, 11:29 pm

Ugh, can we turn this page over?

Denial, that is what I do.


Image


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30 Jan 2018, 11:30 pm

You can do whatever you want to Raleigh, it's a free world.



B19
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30 Jan 2018, 11:32 pm

Raleigh wrote:
B19 wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
^^ most of the feeling is back, except the bits that are permanent, like in my lower leg and foot.
I should have explained that this isn't the first time it's happened, I've been hospitalised for it twice.
The first time they put me in stroke rehab for 3 days, which wasn't much fun, the second time it was only overnight.
It seems like it's just one of those things that's part and parcel of everything else.


My brother experienced very similar things. It looked like a stroke but it wasn't. He had the same illness but lived much longer than they thought he would, and I think you have more of a spirit of survival than he did, and youth on your side, (relative to him). Your spirit generally is a remarkably bouyant and courageous one.

I'm a depressed chicken, really.
Don't let the smokescreen fool you.


As a fellow traveller, on both the WP journey and the cancer journey (you are in an exclusive club with me and APOM :) I know that cancer is a very life-altering passage, not just for the body, but as much (more perhaps) for the soul. In sensitive people (like you Raleigh) it is also often a new and far more deep awakening to suffering of others, as well as our own challenges. It is also a chance to learn to be kinder to ourselves, and there is special kind of loneliness that can be part of this journey. Cherish your self and your strength, which you have in spades; life-threatening illness can greatly enhance this journey of feeling our own feelings, fully, in a new way and sometimes for the first time. My observation is that when faced with cancer, people either grow inwardly or shut down more. I think you are, and always will be, in the first group, so you have my deep affection and admiration, and always my best wishes.



Raleigh
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30 Jan 2018, 11:38 pm

^ may I ask how long your brother survived?

The hardest part of all this is not knowing what's coming.


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B19
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30 Jan 2018, 11:47 pm

2 years after the brain tumour was discovered, though he was already weakened by a previous lung cancer and chemotherapy for that, (and he was in his late 50s when these things happened). They cured the lung cancer, but missed detecting the secondary in his brain. By the time it was discovered, it was inoperable. He had also been a very heavy user of drugs for many decades, and continued to be through his treatment, so his system was very much weakened by his age and other factors. Given his frailness, it was remarkable that he lived that long, they gave him 3 months after the brain cancer was discovered. This was in the UK, under the NHS, I think he might have had a better chance here.



Raleigh
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31 Jan 2018, 12:07 am

2 years seems the average life expectancy.
I'm coming up to 18 months on the 3rd.
I've also read stories of people who've survived for 10 - 12 years without too much disability, and are still going.


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B19
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31 Jan 2018, 12:18 am

You are always welcome to PM me anytime you want to post about it.



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31 Jan 2018, 1:14 am

I visualized overdosing on my medicine a moment ago. My mind wants to believe that nothing will ever get better.



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31 Jan 2018, 5:45 am

Raleigh wrote:
2 years seems the average life expectancy.
I'm coming up to 18 months on the 3rd.
I've also read stories of people who've survived for 10 - 12 years without too much disability, and are still going.


Remember I told you about my friend's sister - she is still going after over 5 years and she is much older than you, probably late 40's/early 50's.
She is also being treated here in the UK which is not the best place to be with a brain tumor.

There is hope and I agree that being young and fit is a huge asset for you. Your body is strong even if you are feeling depressed at present. The depression may be pointing something out to you - I believe it happens for a reason and sometimes that could be telling you to something you need to know. The mind and body is wise.