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SaveFerris
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22 Mar 2018, 2:08 pm

Kuraudo7777 wrote:
I'm not having a very good day. I know that that's just a label I've attached to another word. So why can't i just accept that, with at least three volunteer placements, this course [which goes from 6-9 once a week; I'll probably have to get up at 4:00], and the coursework, I'll barely have any time in the next three months to write?


Can you carry around a dictaphone and speak your ideas when you have free time - a lot quicker than writing and you will have tons of ideas to work with in 3 months


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Kuraudo7777
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22 Mar 2018, 2:12 pm

The trouble is, I've got all of the ideas planned out. Before I got enrolled in the course, the last 8+ days of March were supposed to be Finish Book IV Week[s], April was supposed to be Writing Book VI Month, May and June were supposed to be Writing Book VII Month, and July was supposed to be Writing Book VIII Month.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


Booyakasha
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22 Mar 2018, 2:16 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
I bully people on this forum and send PMs with graphic images depicting violence.

Not really.
But people tell others I do, so....same difference?

Try dealing with that one.



Someone In A Far Away Galaxy wrote:
"You are projecting yourself onto me. You must know what you are doing. You are extremely manipulative, play a victim and twist everything around. You see I have awareness of the kind of behavior you use, thus you are trying to get me upset"


^Try dealing with that

it's weird I am currently dealing with the exact same issue IRL as I experienced here , in a way what happened here was useful as I did a bit of research on projecting and blame shifting - it was a real eye opener although people have got a lot scarier to me.


ohhhhh i want to ban her again and again and again :evil:


Some Bullying Soociopath wrote:
I feel uneasy, with the way she communicates. I have found myself triggered by here and I have witnessed her being irresponsible with other matters, in the forum, on a couple of occasions, and I have learned from experience that I should always trust my gut, until I know for sure, whether my judgement is correct about a person/a person's behaviors.


oh i'll make her uneasy, that's for sure :twisted:


^ This makes me feel guilty , I feel responsible for both of you suffering , you'd never of known if I suffered in silence.
It seems like too high a cost to pay , it's like I've infected you both. :(


But how can this be your fault? :(

Please don't make me feel guilty about you feeling guilty :lol:

You said we should vent so I just wanted to join in the venting wagon so that you two don't feel alone in PBTS.


Well technically it's not my fault , but you wouldn't of known if I hadn't told you.

Now I feel guilty making you feel guilty about me feeling guilty :lol:

Don't get me wrong , I'm all for the venting , I think it's cathartic , but there is also a bit of me that feels partly responsible ( I feel like I put my foot in my mouth ) , I'd like a do-over and not reveal as much information as I did , there are things I have said to you & Raleigh that I should of sugar coated to make it easier on you both :roll:


no, you were right not to sugar coat it!

if you didn't say we wouldn't have known, and Raleigh might doubt even more that he, in fact, did something wrong, which as ridiculous as saying that Trump has a good hair stylist or that Angela Merkle is sexy.

If you sugar coated she might have hurt more people, since I'm not sure that all the truth would have come out, so you sir will be thanked for it whether you like it or not! :P



SaveFerris
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22 Mar 2018, 2:17 pm

Kuraudo7777 wrote:
The trouble is, I've got all of the ideas planned out. Before I got enrolled in the course, the last 8+ days of March were supposed to be Finish Book IV Week[s], April was supposed to be Writing Book VI Month, May and June were supposed to be Writing Book VII Month, and July was supposed to be Writing Book VIII Month.



Is it completely the end of the world if you don't do things to schedule or does it just feel this way ?


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Kuraudo7777
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22 Mar 2018, 2:18 pm

It just seemed like a good opportunity, since April and July are NaNo months [National Novel Writing Months].

and it's Spring, and I'm [usually] full of enthusiasm for writing during Spring.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


SaveFerris
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22 Mar 2018, 2:22 pm

Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
I bully people on this forum and send PMs with graphic images depicting violence.

Not really.
But people tell others I do, so....same difference?

Try dealing with that one.



Someone In A Far Away Galaxy wrote:
"You are projecting yourself onto me. You must know what you are doing. You are extremely manipulative, play a victim and twist everything around. You see I have awareness of the kind of behavior you use, thus you are trying to get me upset"


^Try dealing with that

it's weird I am currently dealing with the exact same issue IRL as I experienced here , in a way what happened here was useful as I did a bit of research on projecting and blame shifting - it was a real eye opener although people have got a lot scarier to me.


ohhhhh i want to ban her again and again and again :evil:


Some Bullying Soociopath wrote:
I feel uneasy, with the way she communicates. I have found myself triggered by here and I have witnessed her being irresponsible with other matters, in the forum, on a couple of occasions, and I have learned from experience that I should always trust my gut, until I know for sure, whether my judgement is correct about a person/a person's behaviors.


oh i'll make her uneasy, that's for sure :twisted:


^ This makes me feel guilty , I feel responsible for both of you suffering , you'd never of known if I suffered in silence.
It seems like too high a cost to pay , it's like I've infected you both. :(


But how can this be your fault? :(

Please don't make me feel guilty about you feeling guilty :lol:

You said we should vent so I just wanted to join in the venting wagon so that you two don't feel alone in PBTS.


Well technically it's not my fault , but you wouldn't of known if I hadn't told you.

Now I feel guilty making you feel guilty about me feeling guilty :lol:

Don't get me wrong , I'm all for the venting , I think it's cathartic , but there is also a bit of me that feels partly responsible ( I feel like I put my foot in my mouth ) , I'd like a do-over and not reveal as much information as I did , there are things I have said to you & Raleigh that I should of sugar coated to make it easier on you both :roll:


no, you were right not to sugar coat it!

if you didn't say we wouldn't have known, and Raleigh might doubt even more that he, in fact, did something wrong, which as ridiculous as saying that Trump has a good hair stylist or that Angela Merkle is sexy.

If you sugar coated she might have hurt more people, since I'm not sure that all the truth would have come out, so you sir will be thanked for it whether you like it or not! :P



fair enough

Image


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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard


SaveFerris
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22 Mar 2018, 2:24 pm

Kuraudo7777 wrote:
It just seemed like a good opportunity, since April and July are NaNo months [National Novel Writing Months].

and it's Spring, and I'm [usually] full of enthusiasm for writing during Spring.


I'm a big believer in everything happens for a reason , just sometimes the reasons are not apparent till months or years later.


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Kuraudo7777
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22 Mar 2018, 2:25 pm

I'm just baffled as to why I'm resisting it. I'm trying to stop, but all I want to do is cry.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


Booyakasha
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22 Mar 2018, 2:29 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
I bully people on this forum and send PMs with graphic images depicting violence.

Not really.
But people tell others I do, so....same difference?

Try dealing with that one.



Someone In A Far Away Galaxy wrote:
"You are projecting yourself onto me. You must know what you are doing. You are extremely manipulative, play a victim and twist everything around. You see I have awareness of the kind of behavior you use, thus you are trying to get me upset"


^Try dealing with that

it's weird I am currently dealing with the exact same issue IRL as I experienced here , in a way what happened here was useful as I did a bit of research on projecting and blame shifting - it was a real eye opener although people have got a lot scarier to me.


ohhhhh i want to ban her again and again and again :evil:


Some Bullying Soociopath wrote:
I feel uneasy, with the way she communicates. I have found myself triggered by here and I have witnessed her being irresponsible with other matters, in the forum, on a couple of occasions, and I have learned from experience that I should always trust my gut, until I know for sure, whether my judgement is correct about a person/a person's behaviors.


oh i'll make her uneasy, that's for sure :twisted:


^ This makes me feel guilty , I feel responsible for both of you suffering , you'd never of known if I suffered in silence.
It seems like too high a cost to pay , it's like I've infected you both. :(


But how can this be your fault? :(

Please don't make me feel guilty about you feeling guilty :lol:

You said we should vent so I just wanted to join in the venting wagon so that you two don't feel alone in PBTS.


Well technically it's not my fault , but you wouldn't of known if I hadn't told you.

Now I feel guilty making you feel guilty about me feeling guilty :lol:

Don't get me wrong , I'm all for the venting , I think it's cathartic , but there is also a bit of me that feels partly responsible ( I feel like I put my foot in my mouth ) , I'd like a do-over and not reveal as much information as I did , there are things I have said to you & Raleigh that I should of sugar coated to make it easier on you both :roll:


no, you were right not to sugar coat it!

if you didn't say we wouldn't have known, and Raleigh might doubt even more that he, in fact, did something wrong, which as ridiculous as saying that Trump has a good hair stylist or that Angela Merkle is sexy.

If you sugar coated she might have hurt more people, since I'm not sure that all the truth would have come out, so you sir will be thanked for it whether you like it or not! :P



fair enough

Image


:lol:

btw, i'll send you this llama's hair-stylist if you ever dare to feel guilty about this again:

Image



SaveFerris
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22 Mar 2018, 2:32 pm

Kuraudo7777 wrote:
I'm just baffled as to why I'm resisting it. I'm trying to stop, but all I want to do is cry.


Although it's never helped me , crying is supposed to be a good release and can put things in perspective.
As for why you are resisting , it sounds to me that you had a set plan/goal in your mind and now you can't do things the way you want which can throw some on the spectrum off kilter


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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard


SaveFerris
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22 Mar 2018, 2:33 pm

Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
I bully people on this forum and send PMs with graphic images depicting violence.

Not really.
But people tell others I do, so....same difference?

Try dealing with that one.



Someone In A Far Away Galaxy wrote:
"You are projecting yourself onto me. You must know what you are doing. You are extremely manipulative, play a victim and twist everything around. You see I have awareness of the kind of behavior you use, thus you are trying to get me upset"


^Try dealing with that

it's weird I am currently dealing with the exact same issue IRL as I experienced here , in a way what happened here was useful as I did a bit of research on projecting and blame shifting - it was a real eye opener although people have got a lot scarier to me.


ohhhhh i want to ban her again and again and again :evil:


Some Bullying Soociopath wrote:
I feel uneasy, with the way she communicates. I have found myself triggered by here and I have witnessed her being irresponsible with other matters, in the forum, on a couple of occasions, and I have learned from experience that I should always trust my gut, until I know for sure, whether my judgement is correct about a person/a person's behaviors.


oh i'll make her uneasy, that's for sure :twisted:


^ This makes me feel guilty , I feel responsible for both of you suffering , you'd never of known if I suffered in silence.
It seems like too high a cost to pay , it's like I've infected you both. :(


But how can this be your fault? :(

Please don't make me feel guilty about you feeling guilty :lol:

You said we should vent so I just wanted to join in the venting wagon so that you two don't feel alone in PBTS.


Well technically it's not my fault , but you wouldn't of known if I hadn't told you.

Now I feel guilty making you feel guilty about me feeling guilty :lol:

Don't get me wrong , I'm all for the venting , I think it's cathartic , but there is also a bit of me that feels partly responsible ( I feel like I put my foot in my mouth ) , I'd like a do-over and not reveal as much information as I did , there are things I have said to you & Raleigh that I should of sugar coated to make it easier on you both :roll:


no, you were right not to sugar coat it!

if you didn't say we wouldn't have known, and Raleigh might doubt even more that he, in fact, did something wrong, which as ridiculous as saying that Trump has a good hair stylist or that Angela Merkle is sexy.

If you sugar coated she might have hurt more people, since I'm not sure that all the truth would have come out, so you sir will be thanked for it whether you like it or not! :P



fair enough

Image


:lol:

btw, i'll send you this llama's hair-stylist if you ever dare to feel guilty about this again:

Image


Send the stylist anyway I am starting to look a little unkempt


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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard


Kuraudo7777
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22 Mar 2018, 2:34 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Kuraudo7777 wrote:
I'm just baffled as to why I'm resisting it. I'm trying to stop, but all I want to do is cry.


Although it's never helped me , crying is supposed to be a good release and can put things in perspective.
As for why you are resisting , it sounds to me that you had a set plan/goal in your mind and now you can't do things the way you want which can throw some on the spectrum off kilter


It can throw anyone off kilter.

I'm supposed to be like an unresisting stream. I feel more like a soggy leaf.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


Temeraire
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22 Mar 2018, 2:36 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Kuraudo7777 wrote:
I'm just baffled as to why I'm resisting it. I'm trying to stop, but all I want to do is cry.


Although it's never helped me , crying is supposed to be a good release and can put things in perspective.
As for why you are resisting , it sounds to me that you had a set plan/goal in your mind and now you can't do things the way you want which can throw some on the spectrum off kilter


I agree with Mr Ferris about having to change our plans - it is never easy.

But what are your fears about doing this course?
It sounds as if there is more than one or two things going on causing you distress.



Kuraudo7777
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22 Mar 2018, 2:41 pm

I'm not really enthused about the course at all--in fact, I don't really want to have anything to do with it, to be brutally honest. I've just been lead into these sorts of things for so many years. I guess I'm kind of jaded.

I don't really know what to do. I feel guilty for still living at home and doing nothing productive all day, and not having a job and not living independently.

My crazy plan of working four jobs and finding an apartment seems so ridiculous.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


Temeraire
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22 Mar 2018, 2:47 pm

Kuraudo7777 wrote:
I'm not really enthused about the course at all--in fact, I don't really want to have anything to do with it, to be brutally honest. I've just been lead into these sorts of things for so many years. I guess I'm kind of jaded.

I don't really know what to do. I feel guilty for still living at home and doing nothing productive all day, and not having a job and not living independently.

My crazy plan of working four jobs and finding an apartment seems so ridiculous.


So are you doing the course because you feel so guilty about not living independently that you are forcing yourself to do things to please others?



Kuraudo7777
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22 Mar 2018, 2:55 pm

...

I guess so. Well, and my mum wants me to/expects me to/asked me to.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII