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Carbonhalo
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30 Jul 2024, 8:12 pm

utterly absurd wrote:
I will walk through the sand. It will all stick to me, and no matter how many showers I take, it will remain stuck to me for the rest of my life. Then I will be buried "over there", and so will the sand.

My cat has figured out how to open doors. How do I keep her from getting out?


Great answer.

To yours I'd say "neutron flood", but that's a bit final.

"What adventures are to be had"
Hitching a ride with a serial killer was one of mine, but not one you can prearrange.
Quite a few of mine have given me the thrill of standing on the edge of death.
Is that what you're after?



CockneyRebel
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30 Jul 2024, 11:44 pm

Afternoon tea

Why do people gamble?


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PineappleLobster
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01 Aug 2024, 11:18 am

To save money.

What’s the difference between a rug and a carpet?


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TwilightPrincess
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01 Aug 2024, 11:24 am

One can fly; the other can’t.

Who was Albert Einstein?



utterly absurd
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01 Aug 2024, 12:35 pm

He was the first person to put an M key on keyboards. Previously no one had been able to find room for an M key so people simply had to type without the letter M.

If technology is constantly improving, then why are most computers still so slow?


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auntblabby
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01 Aug 2024, 2:28 pm

the powers of darkness made 'em be slow.

why is there purgatory?



BillyTree
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01 Aug 2024, 3:06 pm

It was invented by the Americans to boast the sales of air conditioners.

What do you call a beautiful woman with the brains to match it?


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Carbonhalo
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01 Aug 2024, 3:53 pm

PineappleLobster wrote:

What’s the difference between a rug and a carpet?


Easy one...
Carpets are eaten, rugs are munched....ask any moth.

BillyTree wrote:
What do you call a beautiful woman with the brains to match


"Mistress"... obviously

Which came first? The monotreme or the egg?



Double Retired
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01 Aug 2024, 5:02 pm

Obviously the monotreme! They can walk faster than an egg.

What medications should I take tomorrow morning?


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utterly absurd
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01 Aug 2024, 5:22 pm

Just swallow some mints--they look enough like pills your body won't know the difference, and they taste better.

How can I get rid of hiccups?


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PineappleLobster
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01 Aug 2024, 5:32 pm

Run ten laps around your current residence.


Why do the antibiotics i take increase the chances of sunburn?


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Aspiegaming
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01 Aug 2024, 6:13 pm

Because you've been eating your suntan lotion again.

Who is that hairy beast eating all the dip?


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CockneyRebel
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01 Aug 2024, 8:54 pm

Om Nom's been eating all the candy.

Why does my right knee hurt so much?


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02 Aug 2024, 9:49 am

Because it's the right thing to do.

When will the weather get better?


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Aspiegaming
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03 Aug 2024, 8:23 pm

When the sun turns into a black hole.

what are 10 things that go great in a sandwich?


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If my darkness or eccentricity offends you, I don't really care.
I will not apologize for being me.

There is no such thing as perfect. We are beautiful as we are. With all our imperfections, we can do anything.


utterly absurd
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03 Aug 2024, 9:57 pm

Beaver eyeballs
Wood chips
Air
Dead batteries
A brick house
Ants
Dirty socks
More ants
Paint
Tomatoes

Where is the East Pole located?


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