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It tried multiple times, but each chair just started to orbit the Earth, and then collapse with other chairs. There is scientific consensus now that broken chairs are the main part of cosmic dust.

Is our universe orbitting some bigger universe?

As many ancient scholars could've told you, Earth is the center of everything. Our universe orbits Earth. Any other universe, no matter what size, would also orbit Earth.

Who is to blame for the hurricanes that hit Florida?

The Amish and their space lasers.

Why did Miku move to Brazil?

The leading theory is that it was because Brazil has the world's highest concentration of pulverized grapefruit. However, some have suggested it may have had more to do with a glitch in the time zone system that causes it to be perpetually 2:33 am in most of Brazil, except on Sundays and holidays.

If computers are built on logic, why does most of what they do seem so illogical?

Because they divide by zero.

Once upon a time there were three little pigs. The first pig built a house made of straw. The second pig stole a bunch of bird eggs and regretted it. The third pig kept ruining jigsaw puzzles. What is the big bad wolf up to?

About 3 feet (about 1 meter).

What happened with the stolen bird eggs?

They hatched, but found the real world boring so they went back inside. They were last seen staring at their phones.

Why are we all here?

I thought we were all here because funeralxempire promised donuts!

Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego?

In my bedroom.

If Dinosaurs came back from another dimension to rule the Earth, what would you do?

I'd tell them it was good to see them again and update them on family events.

Why does it get so dark at night?

It doesn't, it's just one more social norm. It's assumed to be rude to say that it's bright at night. When children say it, they're ridiculled, so they start to internalize it and actually see poorly at night. As a proof - we often say in Poland that it's bright outside when at the same time you in USA would say that it's dark. It's easily explained by our different cultural backgrounds - we have different social norms of when it's polite to say "it's dark" and when it's rude.

Where are these donuts funeralxempire promised? Did you mail some to me? I'm asking, because my teleporter broke and I can't get them myself.

These are not the donuts you are searching for....

How many coffee beans can you fit up your nose?

The ones I already ate.

What would you like for breakfast: Green Eggs & Ham or Blue Eggs & Toast?

Plaid eggs and a nap.

How do you get all of those coffee beans out of your upper nose?! The left nose is passable so they must've gone in there but the right nose is blocked and so they cannot go out there! (This explains your brown eyes, however.)