Stemming thread - Say anything; bizzar and random

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They walked the lane together,
The sky was dotted with stars.
They reached the rails together,
He lifted up the bars.
She neither smiled nor thanked him,
Because she knew not how,
For he was only the farmer's boy
And she was the Jersey cow!

Sunday is always the first day of the week.

Salem Saberhagen: He played Smells like Teen Spirit with his nose?

Sabrina Spellman: Four verses!

Working for Naomi Campbell can be a nightmare.

"Do the gods of different nations
talk to each other?
Do the gods of Chinese cities
speak to the ancestors of the Japanese?
To the lords of Xibalba?
To Allah? Yahweh? Vishnu?
Is there some annual get-together
where they compare each other's worshipers?
"Mine will bow their faces to the floor
and trace wood-grain lines for me," says one.
"Mine will sacrifice animals," says another.
"Mine will kill anyone who insults me," says a third.
Here is the question I think of most often:
Are there any who can honestly boast,
"My worshipers obey my good laws,
and treat each other kindly,
and live simple generous lives?"

I just checked into the Parasite Hotel.
They ain't got a porter or a bell.
I just checked into the Parasite Hotel.

My parents are such prissy idiots.

I just checked into Lonely Motel
There's no one there but me -
The cigarette dispensers are full
Every parking space is free -
I laid down on the soft bed
and stared into the walls -
With pillows cradling my head
It's time for me to bawl.

Mordecai, get over here this second or YOU'RE FIRED!

All roads lead to Tranquillity Base, where the frown on my face disappears.

It's always a beautiful day in Los Angeles.

So there I was, delirious with scurvy. The only thing standing between me and me treasure was 100 of the ugliest pirates known to Neptune.

There's only one way to find out if a dish is truly ovenproof or not

I think I found some buried treasure!

What's this? "Extremely High Voltage". Well, I don't need safety gloves, because I'm Homer Simp-- [grabs the wires and electrocutes himself; everyone winces]

Aren't you going to stay for brunch?