How do you kill a fly?

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some people say "i would like to have been a 'fly on the wall' " concerning some situation that they wished to attend. i have always dimly considered that phrase because a fly has compound eyes and no auditory process, so it would not be able to understand what is going on in the room on the level that the speaker of the phrase requires to learn.


but what if a fly on a wall is actually someone who found a genie in a bottle and wished to be that fly on that wall? would swatting it count as murder? what if they were swatted 1 second after they found their answer (that relieved them of worry)?

I pick up the fly swatter and smack varying places on the counter until I finally make contact. This process is usually punctuated with 'get back here, you!' 'no! no! I kill you!' and lots of swearing because I have terrible aim. All of this ends with one very squashed fly and lots of little guts on the counter.
Yeah. I have a long way to go before I can be a Ninja.

To successfully kill a fly:
Catch it.
Tie it to a tiny chair.
Force it to listen to Audiobooks version of 'The Twilight Saga'.
Untie it from the aforementioned tiny chair, and set it free.

It will find an appropriately dank place and kill itself.

Sylkat

Lol catch like 30 of em and glue their feet to a tiny paper airplane and youl see a paper airlplane fly on its own at least until the flies die of exhaustion.

Dear Naturalplastic, you are so right...
'Fifty Shades Of Gray' is a much better choice!

Sylkat

Place fly on block "A". Slam block "B" down on fly. Clean off blocks "A" and "B". Done!

Most of the dogs I've had over the years were bug chasers, but especially the last one--a rottie/shepherd mix. She sometimes managed to catch flies, giant mosquitos, moths, and butterflies, too. She usually spit them out afterwards, as they didn't taste good, but once she ate a giant mosquito that I had swatted, but had only succeeded in wounding. She made a face while eating it, though. She also loved to chase the carpenter bees at one house we lived at. The dog we had before her--a border collie/lab mix once caught a bumble bee, made a "terrible taste" face, and spit it out. I couldn't help laughing. I know it didn't sting him, as he would have yelped if it had. The bumble be was all right too, just damp and rumpled.