Erminea wrote:
Mmmm, what to write here now that makes good sense and could help a bit, I wonder or ask myself.
I'm not hitting on you here but you're young, pretty, talented and smart. You have a good sense of humour and I really hope you grow into 'you' actually liking yourself and being a bit proud about it. Please throw away the thought of leaving and choose the opposite.
Plus one day can be totally shite but the next could be beautiful.... I mean, don't think all stays the same all the time. It doesn't.
I learned that, how you look at things determent what you see. ~'hoe je naar de dingen kijkt bepaald wat je ziet'~ Perception is the key word here and it's like coloured sunglasses. Put on really dark ones and everything appears dark. One does this themselves or better said, I, myself choose the perception on how I see the world around. Everybody does this and it's sounds a bit 'kort door de bocht' (short through the corner.... nah, can't be right) maybe but basically one makes his/ her own mood, also this way. I try to choose moderately cheerful sunglasses and think, when forgetting it/ them and things turn darker, hey CJ, watch out and change perception. Or try to and accept that maybe this day wasn't a very good one.
Jeez, I s*ck at this, trying to uplift, making someone (you, others) feel somewhat better about themselves via written words (in this language). The words appear so cold and distant reading them over again.
Bugger.
Hey 1234, will you please remember when you feel a bit down that we here on WP also try to help. Me, others, most mean totally well here.
~
Um, not to end all serious.... would you make me a dress, 1234?

I never ever wore one but it would be an honour. J/k. Although I miss the time my sister made some pants for me. More than 20 years ago but hey.... They were green, totally unique and fitted perfectly.
Oh, being creative helped me also a great deal to uphold my self esteem. Try to be confident.
Blah (3x)
I'll stop here.
I don't think I can do that at this moment:\ Throwing those ideas in my head out, just like that.
I've tried acting happy and trying to see things sunnier than they are, and it all just came crashing back twice as hard.
I can only try being happy for so long until the not so happy things start creeping back.
A lot of people tend to say I'm smart/talented/etc. but I don't believe them. They only know so little of me, not the whole picture.
They only get a glimpse of a moment.
The thing is, I can have the most wonderful day of my life, and still not want to continue living. I have no idea why though.
Am not depressed. Just lost interest in life I suppose. Just dragging my body from A to B to please others. Can't stand being stuck in my mind and want to escape it whenever possible.
You don't suck at writing something uplifting and helpful though:)
I do try to think of times where it's been worse for me and it sometimes helps a bit as it makes me thankful for my current situation. But it doesn't change the fact how I feel at that moment. I can only be thankful it's not worse.
And I'd love to make you a dress
Floral pattern, metallic lycra?
You should ask your sister to make you some again some day^^
Green is a pretty neat colour for pants, don't see it that often.
And I will remember what you said, thanks.