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SpongeBobRocksMao
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20 May 2009, 11:46 am

So random. A kind of randomly random, a randomly random that randoms, randomly.


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CelticGoddess
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20 May 2009, 12:10 pm

SpongeBobRocksMao wrote:
So random. A kind of randomly random, a randomly random that randoms, randomly.


That is something Spongebob would say too. :lol:



mitharatowen
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20 May 2009, 12:57 pm

Oh dear lord.. I need a vacation 8O
I've been doing two people's jobs at work for over a week and I'm about ready to start faking a heart attack to get sent home.

:?



CockneyRebel
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20 May 2009, 1:23 pm

I love Routemasters and no one can stop me.


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1234
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21 May 2009, 7:45 am

Erminea wrote:



But hey.... you.... maybe you should ask yourself the question.... what do I gain here or what is the use me getting an official diagnosis? After my second attempt (not GGZ, three years later), after 2 and a 1/2 sections, they said yeah, we believe you're HFA but we want more testing, talking with other folks again to correctly 'tag' you. And after some thinking, a few weeks later, I concluded, why do I really need confirming something that I already know for sure and decided to go my own way again. Free from locations and situations where I do not feel at ease in the first place.


Just be yourself and a label, tjah.... if you really want one, go for it but do it with assertiveness. Nobody knows you better than you, yourself.



Yep.



Your job sounds quite peaceful:)
And yeah exact same thing here, they don't really give a damn, just want to pump you up with pills to make you shut up.

But I'd like an official diagnosis so I'd know if it really is AS that I have and so I can go from there.
E.g. I could get help to learn how to cope with it, I could get support when needed (maybe not financial, but perhaps someone who could help me out with making sure I stay on track paying my bills/keeping up with the household etc.). I'd also think my parents would be a bit more understanding about my behaviour.
It's very frustrating when you're expected to do something but can't or at least not without great difficulty and immense stress.
And if I don't have it, I could just let the whole 'what if' questions go and move on.

I know getting a diagnosis is not going to be a miracle cure or anything, but hopefully a diagnosis will open up some ways for me.

Though, yeah, if I can get just an indication from the tests at GGZ, I will try and get referred to the autism center in Leiden, 'cause I figure, if anyone knows about autism in the Netherlands, it must be them;)

I know I could just be myself, but I'm not enjoying it very much. It's like there's a suppressed me as well somewhere in me... a me that DOES want to go to social situations, one that DOES want to go out with friends, be able to hold down a job, be able to walk the school without anything 'bad' happening... or even more daring: take the bus etc.,
I hate where I am now and I'm pretty sure if nothing changes I won't stick around for very long 'cause it just makes me miserable day in day out.



Erminea
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21 May 2009, 9:02 am

Mmmm, what to write here now that makes good sense and could help a bit, I wonder or ask myself.

I'm not hitting on you here but you're young, pretty, talented and smart. You have a good sense of humour and I really hope you grow into 'you' actually liking yourself and being a bit proud about it. Please throw away the thought of leaving and choose the opposite.

Plus one day can be totally shite but the next could be beautiful.... I mean, don't think all stays the same all the time. It doesn't.

I learned that, how you look at things determent what you see. ~'hoe je naar de dingen kijkt bepaald wat je ziet'~ Perception is the key word here and it's like coloured sunglasses. Put on really dark ones and everything appears dark. One does this themselves or better said, I, myself choose the perception on how I see the world around. Everybody does this and it's sounds a bit 'kort door de bocht' (short through the corner.... nah, can't be right) maybe but basically one makes his/ her own mood, also this way. I try to choose moderately cheerful sunglasses and think, when forgetting it/ them and things turn darker, hey CJ, watch out and change perception. Or try to and accept that maybe this day wasn't a very good one.

Jeez, I s*ck at this, trying to uplift, making someone (you, others) feel somewhat better about themselves via written words (in this language). The words appear so cold and distant reading them over again.

Bugger.

Hey 1234, will you please remember when you feel a bit down that we here on WP also try to help. Me, others, most mean totally well here.

~

Um, not to end all serious.... would you make me a dress, 1234? 8O I never ever wore one but it would be an honour. J/k. Although I miss the time my sister made some pants for me. More than 20 years ago but hey.... They were green, totally unique and fitted perfectly.

Oh, being creative helped me also a great deal to uphold my self esteem. Try to be confident.

Blah (3x)

I'll stop here.



SpongeBobRocksMao
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21 May 2009, 3:16 pm

Fish in SpongeBob: NOW THAT I'VE GOT YOU RIGHT WHERE I WANT YOU!! !!.... I'd like to buy all of your chocolate. :D


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mitharatowen
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21 May 2009, 3:58 pm

I am SO ready for a long weekend!! !! !! !! !



DocStrange
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23 May 2009, 4:43 pm

This is my 1000th Post! :D


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Lily_cat
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23 May 2009, 7:04 pm

If I have to hear either of the songs I'm dancing to in the dance show one more freaking time I'll scream >_<



JetLag
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23 May 2009, 9:39 pm

DocStrange wrote:
This is my 1000th Post! :D


Congratulations on your landmark 1000th post, DocStrange!


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Strapples
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23 May 2009, 11:08 pm

Lily_cat wrote:
If I have to hear either of the songs I'm dancing to in the dance show one more freaking time I'll scream >_<


*pops in CD with the two songs on loop* enjoy!


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1234
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24 May 2009, 3:19 am

[erminea, I will respond to your post! It's just going to take a little time:), either way it was a very kind post of yours and did help, so don't say you suck or beat yourself up about it]




What is the difference between, say,

"very intellectually gifted" and "very intelligent"

*confused*



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24 May 2009, 3:45 am

My mind has the most amazing ability to come up with worst-case scenarios. Anxiety sucks.


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24 May 2009, 5:10 pm

How do you keep an idiot busy?


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1234
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24 May 2009, 5:55 pm

Erminea wrote:
Mmmm, what to write here now that makes good sense and could help a bit, I wonder or ask myself.

I'm not hitting on you here but you're young, pretty, talented and smart. You have a good sense of humour and I really hope you grow into 'you' actually liking yourself and being a bit proud about it. Please throw away the thought of leaving and choose the opposite.

Plus one day can be totally shite but the next could be beautiful.... I mean, don't think all stays the same all the time. It doesn't.

I learned that, how you look at things determent what you see. ~'hoe je naar de dingen kijkt bepaald wat je ziet'~ Perception is the key word here and it's like coloured sunglasses. Put on really dark ones and everything appears dark. One does this themselves or better said, I, myself choose the perception on how I see the world around. Everybody does this and it's sounds a bit 'kort door de bocht' (short through the corner.... nah, can't be right) maybe but basically one makes his/ her own mood, also this way. I try to choose moderately cheerful sunglasses and think, when forgetting it/ them and things turn darker, hey CJ, watch out and change perception. Or try to and accept that maybe this day wasn't a very good one.

Jeez, I s*ck at this, trying to uplift, making someone (you, others) feel somewhat better about themselves via written words (in this language). The words appear so cold and distant reading them over again.

Bugger.

Hey 1234, will you please remember when you feel a bit down that we here on WP also try to help. Me, others, most mean totally well here.

~

Um, not to end all serious.... would you make me a dress, 1234? 8O I never ever wore one but it would be an honour. J/k. Although I miss the time my sister made some pants for me. More than 20 years ago but hey.... They were green, totally unique and fitted perfectly.

Oh, being creative helped me also a great deal to uphold my self esteem. Try to be confident.

Blah (3x)

I'll stop here.


I don't think I can do that at this moment:\ Throwing those ideas in my head out, just like that.
I've tried acting happy and trying to see things sunnier than they are, and it all just came crashing back twice as hard.
I can only try being happy for so long until the not so happy things start creeping back.

A lot of people tend to say I'm smart/talented/etc. but I don't believe them. They only know so little of me, not the whole picture.
They only get a glimpse of a moment.

The thing is, I can have the most wonderful day of my life, and still not want to continue living. I have no idea why though.
Am not depressed. Just lost interest in life I suppose. Just dragging my body from A to B to please others. Can't stand being stuck in my mind and want to escape it whenever possible.

You don't suck at writing something uplifting and helpful though:)
I do try to think of times where it's been worse for me and it sometimes helps a bit as it makes me thankful for my current situation. But it doesn't change the fact how I feel at that moment. I can only be thankful it's not worse.

And I'd love to make you a dress :lol:
Floral pattern, metallic lycra? ;)
You should ask your sister to make you some again some day^^
Green is a pretty neat colour for pants, don't see it that often.

And I will remember what you said, thanks.