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jk1
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20 Feb 2015, 1:40 am

The first human being that evolved from monkeys was very happy that he had advanced to a higher evolutionary stage.



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20 Feb 2015, 4:52 pm

I hate peppermint tea.


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goofygoobers
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20 Feb 2015, 9:41 pm

I don't feel like I'm going to barf.



downbutnotout
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21 Feb 2015, 1:14 pm

I hear if you say "Inception" three times Leonardo DiCaprio will appear in your room and look at you with a brooding expression on his face.



Kiprobalhato
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21 Feb 2015, 1:22 pm

Hebrew has two separate dative cases, one for inanimate and the other for animate objects.


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הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
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וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.


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21 Feb 2015, 3:54 pm

I never argue with Siri.


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AnonymousAnonymous
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21 Feb 2015, 5:16 pm

I just got grossed out by my sister, who threatened to dump a entire bottle of past-date milk on my head. :eew:


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darkphantomx1
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22 Feb 2015, 7:32 am

I would bang Justin Bieber



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22 Feb 2015, 4:58 pm

I love Justin Bieber.


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johnsmcjohn
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22 Feb 2015, 5:56 pm

Cheese is highly sensitive to which direction it's sliced in. Length wise cuts please the cheese. While any other cuts make the cheese angry. Don't have angry cheese. Slice length wise.



Grommit
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23 Feb 2015, 12:36 am

I told the moon he was made of cheese,

The moon seemed to look quite shocked to hear such a thing.



AnonymousAnonymous
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23 Feb 2015, 3:36 pm

Many areas of the Earth are made of cheese.


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Aprilviolets
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23 Feb 2015, 6:14 pm

Tinned fruit salad is nicer then fresh fruit salad.



jk1
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24 Feb 2015, 5:44 am

Word salad is nicer than vegetable salad.



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24 Feb 2015, 4:41 pm

Miley Cyrus is my sister.


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AnonymousAnonymous
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24 Feb 2015, 10:08 pm

Justin Bieber is my brother.


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