31 Jul 2009, 1:53 pm
31 Jul 2009, 2:20 pm
Seanmw wrote:
where you're really depressed and then suddenly the bout of sadness seems to change suddenly in nature and you find yourself laughing but it feels really wrong and you don't know why it's happening? like it feels like you've got an inexplicable smile pasted on your face like the Joker from batman? but at the same time you feel like crying and the odd and totally incompatible combination makes you feel like maybe it's finally gotten to you, maybe you've finally cracked?
i feel that
mostly my depressions slowly turned into rage-fits, where i would sit at home, and just be FUUUUUURIOUS for a moment or two, not smash anything, cant afford it
but just FUME.
havent felt down in years tho. yearsss
31 Jul 2009, 2:31 pm
ZEGH8578 wrote:
Seanmw wrote:
where you're really depressed and then suddenly the bout of sadness seems to change suddenly in nature and you find yourself laughing but it feels really wrong and you don't know why it's happening? like it feels like you've got an inexplicable smile pasted on your face like the Joker from batman? but at the same time you feel like crying and the odd and totally incompatible combination makes you feel like maybe it's finally gotten to you, maybe you've finally cracked?
i feel that
mostly my depressions slowly turned into rage-fits, where i would sit at home, and just be FUUUUUURIOUS for a moment or two, not smash anything, cant afford it
but just FUME.havent felt down in years tho. yearsss
no, not really rage fits. but more like a feeling of "absence" like it's not even me, because i shouldn't be feeling like laughing at the time. accompanied by a seeming lack of thoughts in words.
it disturbs me on some level.
31 Jul 2009, 2:34 pm
ZEGH8578 wrote:
Seanmw wrote:
where you're really depressed and then suddenly the bout of sadness seems to change suddenly in nature and you find yourself laughing but it feels really wrong and you don't know why it's happening? like it feels like you've got an inexplicable smile pasted on your face like the Joker from batman? but at the same time you feel like crying and the odd and totally incompatible combination makes you feel like maybe it's finally gotten to you, maybe you've finally cracked?
i feel that
mostly my depressions slowly turned into rage-fits, where i would sit at home, and just be FUUUUUURIOUS for a moment or two, not smash anything, cant afford it
but just FUME.havent felt down in years tho. yearsss
.
the kind that send you on adrenaline rushes that make you feel like the juggernaut. but at the same time scare you because you're semi-afraid of what you might do while in this state.
31 Jul 2009, 2:41 pm
yeah, i knew you didnt mean rage fits, but i added them as an alternative to straight out depression, in my experiences :]
the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness more or less. sooo... angry....
i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate well, you probably know the feeling
31 Jul 2009, 2:52 pm
ZEGH8578 wrote:
yeah, i knew you didnt mean rage fits, but i added them as an alternative to straight out depression, in my experiences :]
the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness more or less. sooo... angry....
i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate well, you probably know the feeling
yeah, i get that.
the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness
more or less. sooo... angry....i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate
well, you probably know the feeling when i was younger i was sooo bittter. now i'm not so bitter, but i feel the negative feelings even more. depression feels like it's eating away at my soul and sense of being like a cancer
31 Jul 2009, 2:52 pm
As my plastic surgeon always said, "If you gotta go, go with a SMILE!" HEEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHAHOOHOOHOOHOHO!! ! 
(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies... 
)
31 Jul 2009, 3:05 pm
Seanmw wrote:
ZEGH8578 wrote:
yeah, i knew you didnt mean rage fits, but i added them as an alternative to straight out depression, in my experiences :]
the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness more or less. sooo... angry....
i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate well, you probably know the feeling
yeah, i get that.the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness
more or less. sooo... angry....i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate
well, you probably know the feeling when i was younger i was sooo bittter. now i'm not so bitter, but i feel the negative feelings even more. depression feels like it's eating away at my soul and sense of being like a cancer
i wish now i had know about aspergers earlyer, it woulda saved me a lot of frustration, ive always been fine w my lousy situation, but the pressure has always been the intolerable factor in my life. i actually came to terms w myself and stopped caring some time before knowing about aspergers as well, knowing myself by then well enough to know im not gonna suddenly *snap out* of wherever i am, anytime soon.
just knowing that it actually IS something, has been a huge relief, and i feel better than ever.
the only thing that MAY bring me down a bit, but not even near the point of being depressed or anything, is the idea of having sat and moped away all my 20s
and that im now probably gonna still sit, but not mope so much, away decades to come.
thoughts like "MOST likely, odds-wise, never gonna have offspring." i dont mind, but it in a genetic-purpose-sense it sucks
Brittany2907
The ultimate storm is eternally on it's
Joined: 9 Jun 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,718
Location: New Zealand
31 Jul 2009, 5:21 pm
Seanmw wrote:
where you're really depressed and then suddenly the bout of sadness seems to change suddenly in nature and you find yourself laughing but it feels really wrong and you don't know why it's happening? like it feels like you've got an inexplicable smile pasted on your face like the Joker from batman? but at the same time you feel like crying and the odd and totally incompatible combination makes you feel like maybe it's finally gotten to you, maybe you've finally cracked?
Yes, I've felt like this before. I had been depressed for weeks and I was sitting at my computer desk when all of a sudden I just started laughing. It was like I was in so much pain that my mind just disconnected from itself and even though I wanted to cry, I couldn't stop laughing. I wasn't really laughing outloud but more like a smirk that wouldn't go away. I looked at myself in the mirror and I was thinking..."Have I finally lost it completely?".
If at that time I told someone that I wanted to kill myself they wouldn't have believed me because I was acting like I was really happy or anticipating something fun.
31 Jul 2009, 7:38 pm
31 Jul 2009, 8:19 pm
Cyberman wrote:
As my plastic surgeon always said, "If you gotta go, go with a SMILE!" HEEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHAHOOHOOHOOHOHO!! !
(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies... )
the original batman with adam west?
(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies...
)i swear, that movie was one of the funniest i've ever seen. it's positively ridiculous. adam west is crazy.
31 Jul 2009, 8:37 pm
Seanmw wrote:
Cyberman wrote:
As my plastic surgeon always said, "If you gotta go, go with a SMILE!" HEEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHAHOOHOOHOOHOHO!! !
(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies... )
the original batman with adam west?(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies...
)i swear, that movie was one of the funniest i've ever seen. it's positively ridiculous. adam west is crazy.
Yeah, they sure don't make 'em like they used to... POW!! ! BAM!! ! ZAP!! !
31 Jul 2009, 8:42 pm
Cyberman wrote:
Seanmw wrote:
Cyberman wrote:
As my plastic surgeon always said, "If you gotta go, go with a SMILE!" HEEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHAHOOHOOHOOHOHO!! !
(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies... )
the original batman with adam west?(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies...
)i swear, that movie was one of the funniest i've ever seen. it's positively ridiculous. adam west is crazy.
Yeah, they sure don't make 'em like they used to... POW!! ! BAM!! ! ZAP!! !
and dont forget the jazzy trumpet instead of the actual sound of a smack...
"POW!! !" *Bwaaaat!*
m-hmmm!
31 Jul 2009, 9:33 pm
ZEGH8578 wrote:
Seanmw wrote:
ZEGH8578 wrote:
yeah, i knew you didnt mean rage fits, but i added them as an alternative to straight out depression, in my experiences :]
the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness more or less. sooo... angry....
i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate well, you probably know the feeling
yeah, i get that.the rage fits would almost manifest in absence and temporary blindness
more or less. sooo... angry....i had no idea about aspergers at the time either, which you can imagine contributed some to confusion and anger
i dont HATE people anymore, i am now contently observing them, knowing the why's and all. i used to hhhate them sooo much, and to be among 6 billion entities of what you hate
well, you probably know the feeling when i was younger i was sooo bittter. now i'm not so bitter, but i feel the negative feelings even more. depression feels like it's eating away at my soul and sense of being like a cancer
i wish now i had know about aspergers earlyer, it woulda saved me a lot of frustration, ive always been fine w my lousy situation, but the pressure has always been the intolerable factor in my life. i actually came to terms w myself and stopped caring some time before knowing about aspergers as well, knowing myself by then well enough to know im not gonna suddenly *snap out* of wherever i am, anytime soon.
just knowing that it actually IS something, has been a huge relief, and i feel better than ever.
the only thing that MAY bring me down a bit, but not even near the point of being depressed or anything, is the idea of having sat and moped away all my 20s
and that im now probably gonna still sit, but not mope so much, away decades to come.thoughts like "MOST likely, odds-wise, never gonna have offspring." i dont mind, but it in a genetic-purpose-sense it sucks
yeah, the worst part is not having a choice. i find being happy and positive is the best remedy for the condition, but it's something i rarely feel. i remember some attractive girl i knew was hitting on me for a while (though every time i saw her she was drunk lol. but i didn't care, i was just beside myself with happiness from the actual attention i was getting) and i was optimistic and happy for a straight month. it was like waking from a coma. breaking free of the fog. the positive attitude greatly helped with me with my issue of not being very talkative during that period and it just seemed like i was functioning better. a positive attitude really does help, but as far as i go it has to be really positive. passive happiness is not what i'm talking about, i'm referring to something more along the lines of being ecstatic.
then again, maybe anti-depressant would help too. idk, i've never tried them.
31 Jul 2009, 9:37 pm
ZEGH8578 wrote:
Cyberman wrote:
Seanmw wrote:
Cyberman wrote:
As my plastic surgeon always said, "If you gotta go, go with a SMILE!" HEEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHAHOOHOOHOOHOHO!! !
(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies... )
the original batman with adam west?(I've watched WAY too many Batman movies...
)i swear, that movie was one of the funniest i've ever seen. it's positively ridiculous. adam west is crazy.
Yeah, they sure don't make 'em like they used to... POW!! ! BAM!! ! ZAP!! !
and dont forget the jazzy trumpet instead of the actual sound of a smack...
"POW!! !" *Bwaaaat!*
m-hmmm!
Prof_Pretorius
Veteran
Joined: 20 Aug 2006
Age: 68
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,520
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library
31 Jul 2009, 11:48 pm
