Was what i did wierd?

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ok so this morning, my friend was at her locker. we used to be best friends, now we're just friends. well anyways i went up to her and was talking to her....and got a whif of her perfume, and leaned in a bit and sniffed and said "oh, you smell good, btw!"
she got a really nervous smile and was like "uuuhhmmm......dont. do. that. ever. again!! !! !!"
did i do something wrong? :S. this is a girl who pinches my butt in greeting...so one could assume telling her she smelled nice wouldnt be awkward. X/
wait.....is butt pinching innapropriate, too?

I would only assume the motion of getting close and how you may have done it may have freaked her.
Pinching your butt is also on par with you complimenting a nice fragrance...

Butt pinching is inappropriate. I think she thinks it's fine to be inappropriate to you, but she doesn't like it when you do it to her (even though unintentionally.) She probably thought you were coming onto her, rather than making a simple comment. (I assume she really did smell good, and you meant nothing else by the comment than that. But an NT would read all sorts of weird into it.)

I read somewhere on this site that aspies are often the victims of intentional picking, because we don't pick up more subtle cues. So, we're more likely to have our butts pinched as a joke, or be poked, or have our hair pulled, whatever, since our reactions are different it's easier to laugh at us, and we don't realise it's happening (or if we do, we're not sure why.) In my case people didn't tend to do the butt pinch, tap on the shoulder thing, because I'd "whale" on them, but my son often gets poked, prodded, teased, because he reacts differently to NTs, and the kids think its funny. Part of me wishes he'd over react (as I used to) rather than "Spock out", because at least over reacting put a stop to it.

I would suggest that your friend was being inappropriate to you, and didn't expect you to realise it. She wasn't meaning to be "mean", but she was getting a chuckle out of it. When she thought you were doing the same to her, it freaked her out. And to be honest, it serves her right.

I think they are both inappropriate.

oh? you think she pinched my butt because i didnt seem to react to it? shes complimented my butt before...but i didnt think it was coming onto me.....um...well. i might have leaned in a bit close...but it wasnt intended to be "coming onto her"! ! and i thought i said it in a pretty friendly way, not like, sexual or anything. D: i think i may fail socially more than previously thought X/ this is why i dont like getting close to people! never know whats innapropriate or not.

really? why??? why cant people ever just be honest? she really JUST did smell good. XD.

The world is weird like that. I remember when I did stuff that others thought was inappropriate but I didn't see the harm in it, it's weird.

I don't consider it weird.

Leaning in an smelling her perfume was an invasion of her personal space. On the flipside, pinching your butt was an invasion of your personal space. So if she pinches your butt again, bring up the perfume incident and tell her you would like to have a new policy of not invading each other's personal space. She'll get a little miffed and say she didn't mean anything by the butt pinching. But you didn't mean anything by the perfume smelling. If you say it in a polite way not an angry way, she will see that it's better if you both maintain some personal space.

well i dont think ill bring it up. i honestly dont care that much if my space is "invaded". i just wont tell her she smells good anymore. XD

This is the central question in my life! Why do people ask what's wrong if they don't want to know, for example? I am of the opinion that the world would be a lot better off if honesty was the social norm.

grrrrrr people fail.

It does seem a bit inconsistant of her.

She can pinch your butt- and compliment you on your butt- but you cant do what you did.

Maybe if you had said it differently. Like "I like that new fragrance you're wearing."

Maybe that wouldve been less threatening and even flattering.

now i feel really stupid. she ignores me as well, now. oh well. i dont particularly like her, either!

Hehe, nothing says sexual insecurity better than overreacting like that. You know what, the next time you see her, say "Hey, stranger!"

nooo im too awkward!