Post something that made you UNHAPPY today.

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blooiejagwa
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21 Aug 2020, 10:35 am

He didbt pay for other tgings too like summer camp which i had to go to all day daily with both kids as they said they wdnt take him otherwise n other one was young n too sensitibe tp do without me but luckily parents helped n govt reimburses for a small portion overall fr costs but appreciated greatly


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Fnord
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21 Aug 2020, 10:36 am

He must be a real deadbeat to not support his own kids.  But if my ex wanted to send the kids to camp, she (and her boyfriend) paid for it.


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Last edited by Fnord on 21 Aug 2020, 10:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

Steve1963
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21 Aug 2020, 10:37 am

I think that's the definition of deadbeat. My condolences for having married such a piece of work.



blooiejagwa
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21 Aug 2020, 10:41 am

Fnord wrote:
He must be a real deadbeat to not support his own kids.  But if my ex wanted to send the kids to camp, she (and her boyfriend) paid for it.


But it was a joint decision in our case .
And daycare fr example he wanted against my wish . i gave in . but i pay if any subsidy issues :roll:
He isnt a deadbeat he just has things he does.

The money isnt the issue really the other things are. Using kids medical issues lying to school n therapists refusing to do things essential stuff etc. Deadbeat is not the word.

At allmanipulation/narcissism etc are.
Wd prefer deadbeat to the way he actually is
But very complicated to explain here.


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kraftiekortie
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21 Aug 2020, 10:44 am

You should find some advocacy group in your area for women in your situation.

I’m not promising success....but it doesn’t hurt to start the process of obtaining some sort of child support.

I understand that court proceedings, etc might not be your cup of tea.

I’ll look when I have some time. It might not help immediately....but it’s at least a small step.

And having 2 disabled children might help a bit more.

Yep. I understand “complicated.” I’ve known people in complicated situations. I know it’s not all “black and white.”



Last edited by kraftiekortie on 21 Aug 2020, 10:48 am, edited 1 time in total.

blooiejagwa
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21 Aug 2020, 10:48 am

Honestly I'm lucky in that my parents help n way above the costs. Not worth it.


Just peeved bcuz am contemplating some issues bcuz school is starting n he refuses smthing he signed on (schedule) n his only reason is for not having to give more support.
So it pisses me off bcuz his motivation is so self-centred

Although im not asking fr nor caring abt the support.. (Thts why i added up the costs just to make a point to him that if i cared about $$ i wd have used court for that)

Just the schedule we signed on bcuz the toll of doing it his way shows every school year n each year he refuses


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kraftiekortie
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21 Aug 2020, 10:50 am

You need to use your bargaining chips more.

You’re a very smart lady. I’m jealous of your broad intelligence and insight.



IsabellaLinton
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21 Aug 2020, 10:52 am

Unfortunately, whichever parent can pay their lawyer the most money usually wins these cases. Those parents persist fighting and starting new motions until the other parent can't afford counsel. It's also a matter of which parent is willing to lie or cheat in their paperwork, with less regard for ethics. It's not really about gender. The parent who can't afford to continue, or has difficulty with self-advocacy, is usually at a great disadvantage regardless of the best interests of the children. If a parent has a disability themselves, it is often used against them in their case for physical and / or legal custody. Likewise, court orders are seldom enforced as written despite the high cost and length of time incurred. Enforcement is a very slow, tedious, and expensive process as well.



blooiejagwa
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21 Aug 2020, 10:52 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
You should find some advocacy group in your area for women in your situation.

I’m not promising success....but it doesn’t hurt to start the process of obtaining some sort of child support.

I understand that court proceedings, etc might not be your cup of tea.

I’ll look when I have some time. It might not help immediately....but it’s at least a small step.

And having 2 disabled children might help a bit more.

Yep. I understand “complicated.” I’ve known people in complicated situations. I know it’s not all “black and white.”


KK sorry but you sound a bit like u worry whether ur intention or meaning wd be misunderstood or taken offense to .. It isnt.. Last 3 sentences ...no need to explain :heart:


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kraftiekortie
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21 Aug 2020, 11:03 am

You’re quite okay, Blooie...



blooiejagwa
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21 Aug 2020, 7:26 pm

Another day prayer fr friggin death unanswered and no means fr suicide Available


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shortfatbalduglyman
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21 Aug 2020, 10:38 pm

Weight gain

Ate too much naan

Exhausted

Someone told me Sunday lesson cancelled

Hot

Lazy

Toe



Edna3362
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21 Aug 2020, 10:51 pm

I should go out more often. I'm getting soft over long walks.

Now, malls have mandatory 'no faceshield no entry' policy in addition with the previous concerning masks.
How do I fit my glasses with these?

Maybe I'm buying and try those contact lenses sooner.


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DeathEmperor413
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21 Aug 2020, 11:09 pm

My 'friend' from East Germany basically told me he's glad that Trump is wrecking the US because it's kept Russia out of war. He's also a communist who told me I should stop being selfish and start thinking about other people around the world.

I'm not sure how to take that. Yeah I know the US has selfishly destroyed other countries but being my 'friend' I think it's pretty awful that he's glad my country is falling apart. :(


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cecilfienkelstien
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22 Aug 2020, 10:45 am

blooiejagwa wrote:
So 2019 i was adding it up i paid 24,500 for childcare. With XH who is legally obliged to, not contributing 1 penny...

Hugs


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cecilfienkelstien
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23 Aug 2020, 9:06 am

Anxiety


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