Board index › Off Topic Discussion › Random Discussion

Post a blatant lie

Page 1029 of 1177 [ 18829 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 1026, 1027, 1028, 1029, 1030, 1031, 1032 ... 1177  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

dragonsanddemons
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Mar 2011
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 6,659
Location: The Labyrinth of Leviathan

03 Dec 2020, 12:04 am

I have never told a lie in my life.


_________________
Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"


Edna3362
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Oct 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,504
Location: ᜆᜄᜎᜓᜄ᜔

03 Dec 2020, 12:08 am

Whenever I say 'yes', it means ALL THE TIME, IN ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, WITHOUT ANY EXCEPTIONS.

Whenever I say 'no', it doesn't mean 'never'.


_________________
Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.


Erewhon
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,364

03 Dec 2020, 2:18 am

Christmas songs is the most beautiful music there is on the planet, i love it dearly.
But there is 1 exception, the song below i extremely hate.



Tempus Fugit
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 20 Oct 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,545

03 Dec 2020, 2:58 am

Queen Elizabeth pinched me bum.



Edna3362
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Oct 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,504
Location: ᜆᜄᜎᜓᜄ᜔

03 Dec 2020, 3:15 am

My shoes likes to talk to me.
With my toes for their teeth, they say "WAAAAAAAHHH!! !! !"

Never found that amusing. Nor mom found it worrying. :jester:


_________________
Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,740
Location: the island of defective toy santas

03 Dec 2020, 4:56 am

dogs especially loved maggie thatcher. [google her "nice" video]



FleaOfTheChill
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Jul 2020
Age: 309
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 2,941
Location: I'm stuck in the dryer

03 Dec 2020, 7:50 am

Little known fact about lighters, they're called that because they are actually lighter than air. The way bic combats this problem and keeps lighters from floating away from their owners is by gluing tiny rocks to the bottom part of the inside of their lighters. That also explains why lighters run out so fast...they're only half full of lighter fluid when you buy one.



Tempus Fugit
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 20 Oct 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,545

03 Dec 2020, 8:02 am

Abraham Lincoln is a fictional character.



auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,740
Location: the island of defective toy santas

03 Dec 2020, 8:08 am

i invented air yesterday, while working on a COVID cure that didn't require refrigeration.



maycontainthunder
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Mar 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,875

03 Dec 2020, 8:29 am

My farts can be detected by radar.



auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,740
Location: the island of defective toy santas

03 Dec 2020, 8:55 am

mine can be detected by LIDAR, and are visible from outer space.



Tempus Fugit
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 20 Oct 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,545

03 Dec 2020, 9:22 am

I have a full sized replica of the Eiffel Tower in my living room.



auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,740
Location: the island of defective toy santas

03 Dec 2020, 9:39 am

i ate a magical bug that flew into my mouth which gave me the power to fart in the 7 colors of the rainbow :colors:



CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,554
Location: Stalag 13

03 Dec 2020, 9:57 am

My poop is pink and it smells like roses.


_________________
Who wants to adopt a Sweet Pea?


Edna3362
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Oct 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,504
Location: ᜆᜄᜎᜓᜄ᜔

03 Dec 2020, 10:11 am

And then, from where I came from...

There's a rite of passage for boys to be recognized for their masculinity before puberty... :twisted:

... It does NOT involved getting chopped by tools made of wood, on the stretched tip of their private parts, and then had to wear a skirt for days because of that.


_________________
Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.


Cornflake
Administrator
Administrator

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 65,727
Location: Over there

03 Dec 2020, 5:38 pm

Galileo kept worms in a jam jar.


_________________
Giraffe: a ruminant with a view.