Cabbages & Kings

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Has anyone actually dicussed these important topics yet? They are in the header, after all.

If not, let me be the first to begin a discussion of this lofty and controversial topic.

In this day and age, a monarchy is seen as a pointless component of government, mere figureheads that point to an abandoned way of life. I say not so!

I was decreed, I feel by some sort of god or perhaps just a very powerful squirrel, to rule over all cabbages and leafy vegetables. This birthright may be challenged on this board, but not without a formal duel that emplys the noble weapons of carrot lances and shields of yarnell, also known as mime armour.

So consider this a declaration, my humble subjects. Cabbages for all, God Save the King!

*cue important sounding fanfare*

Cabbage is evil. Kings are evil. Spinach is good. So is choosing a republic over a monarchy.

Too soon for a revolt, mate! I challenge thee to a duel...winner take all, if all=salad bar (all you can eat leafy greens). And carrots. Carrots are important.

This duel will be easy to win. I am the new Sephiroth. I am much more powerful than the original. I am a vampire. But I have different vampiric weaknesses which you do not know. I shall simply stand and wait for your attack.

I'm still waiting. My patience isn't eternal. If I get too bored, I'll just destroy you.

I'm more a ships and sealing-wax sort of person myself.

Both of course being of some value to kings, but of limited interest to cabbages.


On a different track there is some disagreement, if not yet war, as to the true name of the
"King of Cabbages".

Kale?
One seed catalogue offer 38 varieties, including two imperials, a queen and an emperor, as well as a "king of cabbages"

Another website declares itself for "The Rainham Cabbage." but there is a new pretender, the "new F1 Cabbage Kilaxy"

(google is your friend, and your enemy)


Perhaps we should go for a safer topic.
Which end of your boiled egg do you cut open?

Pale Horse.

This is all irrelevant. As soon as I finish building my suit of nuclear-powered armour, I'm taking over the world anyway.

And you know why you'll all obey me without question? Because I'll be wearing a green cape.

A green cape, dammit!

From shoes and ships and sealing wax,
To cabbages and kings,
And while the sea is boiling hot....

I could be a Pearly Drag King, but I'm just happy to be conducting me Buses.

Cabbage stinks almost as much as garlic does.

What about Orange? They don't stink like grapes do and they taste nice. Up the orange!

Wait!--I'll vote for you as a king if you can tell me whether pigs have wings or not.

Oranges are the best!