Childhood sexual abuse advice

Post Reply New Topic

I have been called to make a police statement regarding childhood sexual abuse I suffered many ago. I made a phone call to police about it 3 years ago. That was the first time I ever told anyone. They have now called me as other cases have come up against a particular perpetrator and I want to go and make a statement. I have never spoken face to face about this only over the phone years ago. It's brought up a lot of issues for me. I'm having flashbacks and nightmares again am very depressed any advice from others who have been through something similar?

Sharkgirl, 3 years ago I overdosed and left a note about my childhood abuse. That was the first time I had mentioned it.
When it came to actually speaking about it after the O.D I was an emotional wreck. I can relate to the flash backs etc.
I got to the point I went and saw counselor trained in sexual abuse.
You sound like the same thing that is happening with you is what happened with me; triggered.
It would be very confronting for you to receive that phone call, so it triggers all the memories all over again.
My advice would be to call someone at a sexual abuse clinic. They were such a help to me.
They didn`t push for any details of the abuse or anything.
It was all based around me trying to deal with it all and she didn`t care what came out of my mouth when I expressed how I felt about the perp. I think seeing someone saved me from PTSD.
I think you are really strong and brave if you decide to give a statement to the police. Don`t let anyone push you into it if you choose not to. All the best with it all

Thanks for replying Ohisee,
I think u are right I should try to get some counselling about this. I feel stupid so many years later actually addressing this now. I do want to make a statement as I want the perp to be held to account or at least made unable to work with kids anymore. Apparently there are 4 new reports from last year. It's so horrible and it would be worth it to at least save 1 person from this hell. You sound like u have made a great deal of progress since u tried to take your own life.

Sharkgirl, don`t feel anything about yourself in regards to taction action so long after it happened apart from how strong you are for doing it.
My perp has had a stroke plus heart attack so he wont be doing anything to anyone ever again.
Yes I have come along way dealing with the abuse.
Still has it`s days though.

It gets slightly better over a very long time. Ive never been able to open up about it apart from making the report a couple of years ago until now. I felt a lot worse about myself before and that is likely why I couldn't mention it. This has had such an unbelievably profound impact on me people should get life In jail with mental and physical torture regularly as punishment. Then they would know what it feels like and likely the high incidence if this would reduce. Do you feel as though it affects many areas in your life now or are you free. I know you say some days it's bad. I feel like it hits me every now and then very hard and I'm depressed for weeks or months then it seems to disappear however it's always there in some form in my subconscious ad the way I relate to people. It's hard to disentangle what is autism and what is abuse but added together it's a big disaster that I work very hard to ignore, override and cope with everyday.

First of all, *HUGS* Sharkgirl.

I agree with OhISee about maybe finding a therapist or someone you can speak with professionally. If you do decide to go that route, make sure that the therapist you see is someone trained to handle situations such as these with the greatest sensitivity. And above all, do not feel guilty about any of this...none of this was your fault. I don't really know you and you may not really know me, but if you want to just talk about anything, just message me, okay? If you do, I promise to reply as soon as I am able.

I'm so sorry you're going through this...I never really know what to say in situations like these, but I do hope that something I've said here is helpful to you.

Thanks for the advice little pink coupe I think I am ready to finally get some treatment

Hi - must be terrifying for you but talking about it will help and therapy is really helpful - have you tried the psych central forums? They have lots of advice and supportive folk who have gone through similar experiences - I am one, too Good luck with it all.

Hi thanks for the reply BelleAmi
tomorrow morning is the police interview I have been practicing what to say all week, freaking out, reliving everything again etc.
I will have a look at the psych central forums - I tried another forum called after silence and they still haven't signed me up as a member after 1 week, no response and others on there have complained about that too,
That's why I came on here to discuss.

anyway I cant wait to get this over with, I just want to have something positive come of this, the damage is done to me, but to have a chance of stopping it happening to anyone else is very important.

Thanks for the book suggestion that is great.
I went to the police today - felt so sick before hand. Anyway 2 hours later have completed a statement. The police officer is pretty convinced that she has enough evidence to convict him based on my reports and 4 other girls that have all come forward in the last month. It happened to them all last year and mine dates back 20 years ago - the police officer said that all the statements sound almost identical in terms of how he went about doing it and what he actually did. He is a teacher so its pretty bad who knows how many school kids he did this to. Anyway she thinks he is certain to go to jail for this so I feel so good for having done it finally.
I also got the number for some free counselling through victims of crime so that is awesome.
I will certainly need some counselling in the lead up to taking the stand in court and being cross examined.
They say telling people makes it a lot better and I found it so hard to talk about that I didn't think it would be the case - but I certainly feel so much better today. Finally able to concentrate on life again. Thanks so much everyone for your support.

So glad you are feeling much better Sharkgirl.
I think in a strange way my abuse made me a little less naive about the world, so when I had children I was more than aware anyone is capable of abusing children.
My perp was a family member.

It's really strange to me that you women are so strong!

as a man, I would plan and execute their torture to death exactly
(of rapists, child molesters and murderers)
I've gone back nd read some of the quotes in the thread



Why the f**k don't you own guns!
seriously!


Yeah, I know that was a stupid thing to say, because as the creators of life guns are anathema to you!
but think about it for a moment
guns are a male thing

if every woman had a gun
every man on earth would be emasculated

and f**k them!

I don't know why you put up with us

I did try to buy a gun, but considering I was thirteen at the time I just got a very hard stare from the gun shop owner

You're very brave, I wish you all the best.