Knowing you are odd but not knowing how you are odd

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I have always accepted I am a little odd because I got bullied at school, and children/teenagers tend to pick on children who are different.
However precisely how I am odd beyond the broad level of being introverted,shy,bad at small talk and initiating conversations,physically and socially awkward, escapes me.
Obviously I present in certain ways IRL and to a lesser degree online that it's hard for me to gel with other people.

I think I tend to back off from situations where social interaction might be involved because how I am is a red flag for people to be negative or even outright hostile towards me.
Have been agonising over what my public school house master said many years ago in response to a letter by my local vicar about my being bullied . He said "Unfortunately he is the sort of boy that invites this treatment'. Although on the level of blaming the victim it was a crass thing to say it does indicate that certain boys/girls are seen as all too obvious targets for negative peer reactions, and a " Well what did you expect?" attitude from teachers and other adults.

It may be wrong, and a sign of a certain degree of societal sociopathy, that adults/children who are different become the target of negativity, but on an immediate and practical level one needs to fit in in order not to be a victim of that abuse and negativity.

However how to fit in when only broadly knowing how you are different/socially awkward is the question. Also how to maintain your basic goodness in a world that tends to value conformity, even if you are a nasty so and so ,over being good but different .

Thoughts welcomed.

Quick question what is odd?

Secondly can you describe a situation where you have failed to detect how odd you are?

I just know I must have been different/odd due to negative peer reactions.
It is not about failing to detect that I am odd, but not knowing fully how I am odd.

Well describe how you would be in that situation? What do you think causes them to think you are odd?

At school: Being introverted,shy, poorly coordinated and poor at sports, physically and socially awkward.

Well do you know exactly why you are odd. People can tell you are different from others. Most people aren't shy or socially awkward anyway haven't you just identified the reasons why you are odd?

Or is it something else?

Are you confusing how with why?