Tea, tea, tea

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What is it about British people and endlessly drinking cups of tea? What's worse is when they ask ME to make it. Can't they make it themselves? If I was to demand somebody else to make me a glass of orange juice, they'd call me lazy and ask me why I can't make it myself. Well, it's the same with tea. I don't even drink hot drinks.
One day I'm going to hurl the kettle across the yard and watch everybody freak out. I think tea has the same psychological effect on people as does smoking.

I'm not against people drinking tea like I am against smoking, but I just wish people wouldn't keep asking ME to make it.

Where do people ask you to make tea for them?

It'd never cross my mind to ask anyone to make me any drink, particularly if they already look pretty pissed off about it. The least disgusting thing I'd expect them to do with my drink is to spit in it.

Interesting perspective. If I have friends over, and I've got the kettle on, I'll ask if anyone else wants anything, but they usually don't.

Speaking of which, I have the kettle on right now...I should probably go check on it.

A well-mannered guest would wait to be offered, and not demand a cuppa.

But the kettle's on the boil, and we're so easily called away...

Just say no.

In my experience the people who make those kind of demands are lazy and always give you the crap end of any deal.

Relatives ask me to make tea at my mother's house when I'm there visiting. Mostly my uncle demands me to make tea. And when I say no he says I'm impolite.

I don't mind bringing people a cake, but I just hate making tea if there is a lot of people to make tea for. Then when you're out in the kitchen for about 10-15 minutes making all the tea, by the time you come back to where everyone's sitting, you find somebody's stolen your seat.

And no, I would never spit in people's tea, that's just gross.

I might would tell him that he's impolite by expecting me to make it when I don't even drink it.

I always wondered what was up with tea and tea time there. I'll always want coffee over tea.


Maybe Mr. Teatime knows:

I think that this is the kind of situation that you have to turn around slowly. Some people have the knack of being able to say no in a way that still sounds friendly. I can sympathise with your predicament, in the past situations like these have really bugged me and eventually I've ended up loosing my cool.
So whatever small protest you can manage while still sounding relaxed or "if I make the tea can you save my seat for me please?" and then wait until your request has been acknowledged. That might be uncomfortable for you but you can say it from the doorway and it's a step in the right direction.

You mean there are people who don't?

There are kind people too.

When I feel put upon I sometimes start using the person's mannerisms back on them, in this case, "go on, stick the kettle on then mate, I'll find us something to watch on the telly", delivered in a very matey tone.

One cannot simultaneously set a boundary & take care of the other person’s feelings. He may feel you are impolite, but he’ll live.

Of course the other person will live; the only reason we're hardwired to care in the first place is that sometimes you won't.

I guess I am a little lost by this thread. Making a cup of tea is not difficult. Here in the U.S. you just boil water and drop in a tea bag. I even simplify the process by boiling my water in a microwave. I guess in the U.K. there is more of a ritual. Maybe it is the difference between a cup of coffee at Starbucks and a cup of coffee at home.

It is common for a host to offer their guest a drink (coffee, tea, water, coke). It is simple common curtesy. But if you are not a host or a guest, why would someone ask you to make them a cup of tea?

I remember at work there was a guy who was forced to make coffee. They had a ritual that everyone took their turn of making coffee for the entire group and this was done on a rotating basis. The problem was that he was not a coffee drinker. And that is basically unfair. So when it came his turn, the girls in the office showed him how to make coffee using a coffee maker. So the first time he made coffee, he used 1/10 the amount of ground coffee and it was like water. The girls in the office would take him back to the coffee maker and retrain him. The second time he made coffee, he used 10 times the amount of ground coffee and it turned out to look like molasses. Again the girls took him back to the coffee machine and retrained him. The third time he made coffee, he mixed the coffee to the proper ration but then added a can of coke. After that they decided that he was incapable of making a cup of coffee and took his name off the list.

I suspect he made it wrong on purpose with that hope in mind.