Christmas stress

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Is it something you get? What about it stresses you? Do you get "infected" by other people's stress?

I myself don't really stress about it as a whole, but there are two things that cause some worry most years.

First is the fact that my mom always stresses about Christmas. Not sure why, but she does, so I try not to get in her way and add to her stress. During Christmas we spend more time together than usually, so the odds of me getting in her way are higher, which is stressing.

Then there's Christmas presents. I tend to just get something little for my closer relatives, but when it comes to my family's gifts, I try to put some thought in to it and get something they'll really like, even giving one or two of them something slightly more valuable. When I do that though, it stresses me even more as I'm never completely sure they'll like it/find it useful. Also, it's hard to come up with ideas of what to give. Mom's always been easy, and my little sister used to be too, but she's growing up now and I still have no idea what to get her this year. Usually the problem is my big sister, but she moved out on her own last year and is still missing one rather essential thing that I can afford and get my hands on, so I'll get her that. Of course, my dad's also a problem every year. I just don't know what he'd like and stuff I get him usually goes unused unless it's chocolate... with clothes there's the problem that I'm not sure about the needed sizes.
And no, I can't just leave someone in the family without a present. That'd be rude when everyone else gets one (or sometimes two, even three when my little sister was small and I couldn't resist buying nice but cheap toys and stuff.)

Success for me is getting a Christmas tree up before Christmas and getting Christmas cards out be Valentine's Day. No joke. Gifts are a stress for me all times of the year, and I rarely give any outside my children. My ASD coach suggested I minimally contribute to the family dinner and be confident about that rather than ashamed.

When I lived with my parents, I always volunteered to clean bathrooms before Christmas.
This way I could shut myself away from all the pre-Christmas fuss and stress while "doing something useful". The bathrooms were the best cleaned rooms in the whole house

After I experienced it can be otherwise, I learned to really value the "all presents are from Santa" rule in my family. You just secretly drop labelled presents under the Christmas tree and no one is allowed to investigate which comes from whom. That makes giving presents a lot less stressful.

Anyway, for the last few years, after each Christmas, I landed in mental distress for several weeks, sometimes not getting much better until May. Thus, this year I'm planning to really minimize not only my contribution, but even my presence in the celebrations.

But your handwriting can give you away. Or if someone knows what kind of wrapping paper you're using.

I use many different wrapping papers and I print.

I get stress every year, it's my least favorite holiday. Stores are more crowded, people are ruder, and I never know what to get anyone - I just get overwhelmed.

My Mum went to give someone an aniversary card (Or a birthday. I think it was aniversary) and she didn't have her glasses and picked an "In sympathy" card. It was a good job I noticed before she sent it.

I don’t go to family parties anymore, it’s tooooo much for me, I get stress by thinking about what to wear, going, being sooooo bored, having to talk & each person have to bring something. I’m very happy being home with my cat. And I’m very happy to have a boyfriend for the holidays, but he is in Asia for work,he finally be finished working in January, too bad we can’t spend New Years Eve together, but I have to wait probably till February to see him, cuz he is going to France to see his daughter.

That's one way to do it. My mom has a habit of keeping an eye on what comes from what kind of wrappers so that if some gift is missing the note of who gave it, she can narrow down the suspects.

Kids will figure it out for themselves when they reach a certain age.

While they are little kids, though, I would still keep the Santa thing going. It makes them happy.

But does the Santa thing really keep children happier than knowing that it's the adults that get the presents would? If the kids knew who the presents are from, parents wouldn't have to stress so much about hiding the wrapping papers and such... though if the kids knew, they might try to find the presents before it's time.

When I was about 9 years old. I got a 3-speed bike. That was a REALLY big deal. I knew it was from my parents, and not from Santa.

However, I was happy to keep the Santa thing going----just in case, I thought. You never know.

I humored my parents.

If they really don't like the Santa thing, and don't believe in Santa, then I would stop emphasizing Santa.

If a child, especially one who could read fairly well, would ask me about Santa, I would refer the child to a letter written by a little girl named Virginia, about 1898 or so, to the New York World newspaper, asking if Santa Claus existed.

In essence (not an exact quote), the New York World person answered that "even though there might not, in reality, be a Santa Claus, the IDEA of Santa Claus should remain in people's hearts."

I'm handling it: When we pack together things for extended family, I say we're helping Santa.
One day, they will realize there is no Santa, only the helpers.
It wasn't any kind of a shock to any of my siblings.

Ooh, so it's a "everyone is one of Santa's elfs" -kind of thing? I wish my mom had done that.

The stores get too insane this time of year. Just doing my normal weekly grocery shopping is going to get rough. But I also get bored and stir-crazy when everything is closed for the holidays. I have to get out at least once between Christmas and New Year's Day to look at the Valentine's and Easter junk.