Mountain Goat wrote:
When I get situations that I can't deal with I will hide when I get back home, even though the situation could have been when I was working (E.g. an angry customer) and home is not at work. I would spend the evening in my bedroom and even hide in there so I feel safe from the angry customer... As what happened would repeat through my head for a while... I am recalling one event now. Somehow it is hard not to. If someone says something to me in anger, it stays with me when they have forgotton all about it. They may not see this, but it can effect me for a long long time as it can be hard to distance from the event? Hence why I sometimes hide as it is a way of distancing?
That’s something that would probably get me fired if I had a job where I had to deal with situations like that, because I couldn’t wait until I got home - immediately following the incident, I would find a corner or a small space to hide in until I’d calmed down enough to be semi-functional. Most employers probably wouldn’t take too kindly to that, I’m guessing.
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Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"
11 May 2020, 5:45 pm
