Fish and their relationship to mushrooms

Post Reply New Topic

Once a fish went to a grocery store. It said to the shopkeeper, "I need some produce." The shopkeeper said, "but you have no arms, how can you hold a shopping basket?" In reply, the fish said "I need no arms for I have my brain." The shopkeeper said, "Ah, I see, have your basket." The fish took the basket and went to look for produce. In the produce aisle it found large portions of fresh vegetables, but they were all too high for it to reach, so it began to swish its tail very roughly until the vibrations caused a major seismic event, at which point a large crate of mushrooms tipped over and spilled their contents onto the ground, where the fish began to eat happily of their contents, until the shopkeep reminded the fish "Hey, you need to pay for those." "Quite right you are, said the fish, but as I have already eaten them, you need simply weigh me upon my exit to know the exact price to charge me." "Quite right you are" said the shopkeep, "but how am I to know where they end and you begin?" "Why you need simply look at all my brethren you have up there packed in ice and compare my weight to theirs, I am sure we are very similar." "Indeed, we can try that." So the shopkeep placed the fish on the scale and quite dismayed to find the fish weighed less than any of its brethren on the store shelves. "Why you are quite light, you must have given me some musrooms," so he paid the fish for his mushrooms and set him on his way.

Hmm that was a bit strange.

I once saw a young pigeon ask another if the things below them on the ground kept all their feathers on the inside or if they were just tucked away underneath them. The other one told it "stupid, their feathers are the same color as the ground, that's why you can't see them!" Then they started fighting over a piece of a worm until one of them grew tired and fell asleep, while the worm suddenly grew very large and ate the other, at which point it took over the role of a pigeon and when it was ready to jump out of the nest, it forgot it did not have any wings and so fell to the ground, where it buried itself in the earth and resumed its former life.

hippies...

I am not a hippie, I am a surrealist... at least at the moment. Tomorrow I might be a bluejay!

welc0me to WP

Gracie nice flower. How do you be this afterevening?

I don't not speak english!

Surely everyone must not speak english on occasions. Would your lips not get tired from the constant movement?

I alsmot neevr spaek egnlish!

Why your username?

My username is representative of a name that is not my name, but perhaps a name that belongs to some person who is not mine. In any case, not being my name, it happens to be an alias, so I chose a name that was an accurate description of said name, which also happens to be an accurate description of itself. Why yours?

it's just a song

Who's your fave (surrealist) artist/writer/etc?

Oddly, I don't know too many other surrealists, I was given a surrealist book once, but it looked so tasty I had to eat it, and so didn't much of the content of it, it tasted good though, so I assume he was a good writer.

Generally books go good with a nice pinot grigio, which I did not happen to have at the time, but I put a little garlic on it and had it with some absinthe, it was quite lovely.

Interesting

I'll try that on a book I never finished

...but with a sevenUp... (I can already hear people screaming ¡HERESY!)