Women should be able to form boundaries against males

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Dillogic
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31 Jan 2015, 6:18 pm

Not checks, but the threat of being fined if you don't have the ID card.

It's no different to disability cards that prove you're disabled.

If you can prove you're female, then go right ahead.



Dillogic
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31 Jan 2015, 6:19 pm

Anna_K wrote:
I think that trans women should be able to use the women's bathroom. They may have been born male, but they consider themselves female, so why not? If they looked feminine enough, no one would be able to tell.


I'm entirely healthy, but I identify as disabled, so I can use the disabled facilities, right?

Same logic, and the same rules people have to follow now.



trollcatman
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31 Jan 2015, 7:38 pm

Do non-trans also need to carry id to prove they are in the right restroom?
And what when the only stall in the men's room broke down, and I need to poo? Am I then allowed to use the women's room even though I am not a woman?



Dillogic
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01 Feb 2015, 4:59 pm

trollcatman wrote:
Do non-trans also need to carry id to prove they are in the right restroom?


The problem is, it's very easy to say you're trans-whatever, and proclaim that you can use facilities that women do -- what if your fetish is listening to women use the toilet? Now you allow someone, a man (whom doesn't have to take hormones and/or have his dong cut off when available), to abuse women.

It's no different than someone abusing disability services when they aren't disabled.

Sure, you can say it's superfluous, as said man could just dress up as a women/sneak in, but that's not the point; the point is what you approve of concerning the things people do.



seaturtleisland
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02 Feb 2015, 2:49 am

trollcatman wrote:
And what when the only stall in the men's room broke down, and I need to poo? Am I then allowed to use the women's room even though I am not a woman?


I'd probably say you're out of luck.



seaturtleisland
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02 Feb 2015, 3:17 am

Dillogic wrote:
trollcatman wrote:
Do non-trans also need to carry id to prove they are in the right restroom?


The problem is, it's very easy to say you're trans-whatever, and proclaim that you can use facilities that women do -- what if your fetish is listening to women use the toilet? Now you allow someone, a man (whom doesn't have to take hormones and/or have his dong cut off when available), to abuse women.

It's no different than someone abusing disability services when they aren't disabled.

Sure, you can say it's superfluous, as said man could just dress up as a women/sneak in, but that's not the point; the point is what you approve of concerning the things people do.


I have to agree with you somewhat. For the vast majority of cis-men it wouldn't even be worth it to come out as trans publicly to those they know just to creep on women let alone seriously seeing someone about it and taking hormone therapy. SRS? Way out of the question for them but I doubt they'd even watch themselves be feminized by hormones and still think it's worth it. Trans people make sacrifices, and face social stigma. It wouldn't be worth it for a cis-guy to seriously fake being trans but it costs him nothing to self-identify. It costs him nothing to say to everyone "hey it's ok I'm trans".

One issue is the amount of sacrifices and the degree of transition that is necessary to use the appropriate bathroom since there can be barriers for people. Hormones aren't free. Just seeing someone to start out costs money. There are things that are actually very hard to do that are more accessible. If someone comes out as trans to everyone they know, spends a great deal of time and effort changing their voice, buys a few new outfits and make-up (what they can afford) and stretches those things as long as they can last but hasn't started a medical transition yet due to certain barriers then does that person get a pass? The criteria for being recognized are kind of arbitrary. You can't say for sure what number of steps are beyond what a cis-guy would be willing to take just to be a creep. I would say that he probably wouldn't even be willing to come out to a large number of the people he knows and not only face social stigma but be questioned, doubted, judged, and resented when people notice he's not doing anything. Other people might say the average creeper would be willing to put up with that.



trollcatman
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02 Feb 2015, 8:42 am

seaturtleisland wrote:
trollcatman wrote:
And what when the only stall in the men's room broke down, and I need to poo? Am I then allowed to use the women's room even though I am not a woman?


I'd probably say you're out of luck.


If I really need to poo, and the establishment does not allow me to use any restroom, it is they who are out of luck.



trollcatman
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02 Feb 2015, 8:45 am

Dillogic wrote:
trollcatman wrote:
Do non-trans also need to carry id to prove they are in the right restroom?


The problem is, it's very easy to say you're trans-whatever, and proclaim that you can use facilities that women do -- what if your fetish is listening to women use the toilet? Now you allow someone, a man (whom doesn't have to take hormones and/or have his dong cut off when available), to abuse women.

It's no different than someone abusing disability services when they aren't disabled.

Sure, you can say it's superfluous, as said man could just dress up as a women/sneak in, but that's not the point; the point is what you approve of concerning the things people do.


I'd say that is a fairly minor problem compared to forcing people to carry id just so they can use public restrooms like everybody else. Maybe there are people getting a hard on when they see a hot women on the public transport, let's outlaw public transport so this horror will never happen again.



Dillogic
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02 Feb 2015, 3:29 pm

trollcatman wrote:
I'd say that is a fairly minor problem compared to forcing people to carry id just so they can use public restrooms like everybody else. Maybe there are people getting a hard on when they see a hot women on the public transport, let's outlaw public transport so this horror will never happen again.


There's a really really really~ big difference between staring at someone on a bus and sitting in the next stall in public toilets. Perhaps if you grew up in a place like India or China, it might not seem that big a deal, but where I am from, it's as private as bathing -- we don't approve of people stalking and sneaking up to spy on those bathing. Albeit you're often ok with being around the same sex, as it's unlikely they find some sexual pleasure of being around you. It's why we have male and female specific facilities in the first place, for comfort and a feeling of security.

Whilst I sorta agree that an ID is a bother, just as it is for the disabled, it's one way to show people are serious about their transition. I also agree with the previous poster with the burden of proof -- perhaps I was a little harsh with surgery + medication being needed, but I don't think it's harsh that people would be working towards that if they were serious about transition (I know I would be).



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08 Feb 2015, 12:24 pm

I'm a person who doesn't much care about this issue. I wouldn't say I'm completely trans-loving. I do not accept transwomen as women completely - for example competing in women's sports. As an amateur athlete (and a bad one) I would not want to play rugby with or against a trans-woman. I couldn't give a stuff about being with her in the showers after, say if she were refereeing. I'm a straight woman and I shower with straight women and lesbians.

HOWEVER, I do not care if they are using the same bathrooms as me.

On the other hand, the original sign that was posted was so bloody patronising that I have to admit I'd be on the side of the people who protested against it. It said

Quote:
If you're in a public bathroom and you think a stranger's gender does not match the sign on the door, follow these steps:

1. Don't worry about it, they know better than you.


(and you can see a link here http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/universityeducation/student-life/11238813/University-trans-awareness-poster-prompts-huge-response.html )

It completely sounds like "Hey little girl, you don't know any better than a man, even if he's now a woman."



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08 Feb 2015, 12:56 pm

Dillogic wrote:
Not checks, but the threat of being fined if you don't have the ID card.

It's no different to disability cards that prove you're disabled.

If you can prove you're female, then go right ahead.


Aren't there already enough little nuisance laws where if violated you have to pay a fine?...being fined for not bringing an ID card to the bathroom, please....you've got to be kidding me. Also disabled people carry cards to get accomodations/services they need, its a totally different thing, I have a special ID card for the bus so I get a discount fare for instance.

Anyways even if they did create that stupid policy, transgender people can get their ID changed to reflect the gender they are living as rather than their sex if that doesn't match so still would not prevent transgender people from using the womens bathroom :twisted:


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Sweetleaf
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08 Feb 2015, 12:59 pm

Dillogic wrote:
Anna_K wrote:
I think that trans women should be able to use the women's bathroom. They may have been born male, but they consider themselves female, so why not? If they looked feminine enough, no one would be able to tell.


I'm entirely healthy, but I identify as disabled, so I can use the disabled facilities, right?

Same logic, and the same rules people have to follow now.


As far as I know anyone can use the disabled stall in the bathroom, however the polite thing to do is give it up for someone in a wheelchair or with physical movement problems that would have trouble in the normal sized stalls. I do not typically see specific disabled bathrooms but when I have I doubt anyone would be hassled for using if if the other ones are being used and there is not a disabled person waiting to use it.

So yeah go for it if you desire.

I don't see how that has to do with someone using the bathroom for their gender, or how it implies it would be better to force transgender woman to use the males bathroom.


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Sweetleaf
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08 Feb 2015, 1:07 pm

Dillogic wrote:
trollcatman wrote:
Do non-trans also need to carry id to prove they are in the right restroom?


The problem is, it's very easy to say you're trans-whatever, and proclaim that you can use facilities that women do -- what if your fetish is listening to women use the toilet? Now you allow someone, a man (whom doesn't have to take hormones and/or have his dong cut off when available), to abuse women.

It's no different than someone abusing disability services when they aren't disabled.

Sure, you can say it's superfluous, as said man could just dress up as a women/sneak in, but that's not the point; the point is what you approve of concerning the things people do.


So it should be assumed transgender woman who use the womens bathroom do so to somehow abuse/harass women? Because maybe someone one time lied about it to listen to women piss and poop for their fetish? Hell maybe we should disallow lesbians from the female bathroom too since some of them might have the same fetish....

And no a transgender using the bathroom that fits their gender rather than sex is not even close to the same thing as someone abusing disability services. Transgender females are legally women, so how are they abusing anything by using the women's bathroom?


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Sweetleaf
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08 Feb 2015, 1:19 pm

Dillogic wrote:
trollcatman wrote:
I'd say that is a fairly minor problem compared to forcing people to carry id just so they can use public restrooms like everybody else. Maybe there are people getting a hard on when they see a hot women on the public transport, let's outlaw public transport so this horror will never happen again.


There's a really really really~ big difference between staring at someone on a bus and sitting in the next stall in public toilets. Perhaps if you grew up in a place like India or China, it might not seem that big a deal, but where I am from, it's as private as bathing -- we don't approve of people stalking and sneaking up to spy on those bathing. Albeit you're often ok with being around the same sex, as it's unlikely they find some sexual pleasure of being around you. It's why we have male and female specific facilities in the first place, for comfort and a feeling of security.

Whilst I sorta agree that an ID is a bother, just as it is for the disabled, it's one way to show people are serious about their transition. I also agree with the previous poster with the burden of proof -- perhaps I was a little harsh with surgery + medication being needed, but I don't think it's harsh that people would be working towards that if they were serious about transition (I know I would be).


Its really not any of your buisiness how far along a transgender person is in their transition or if they are even getting physical transition surgery/treatment since that is their private business. Also how is sitting in the next stall to someone anything like stalking or sneaking up on someone while bathing?


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Dillogic
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09 Feb 2015, 2:47 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
Its really not any of your buisiness how far along a transgender person is in their transition or if they are even getting physical transition surgery/treatment since that is their private business. Also how is sitting in the next stall to someone anything like stalking or sneaking up on someone while bathing?


Why not? There's obviously a point where someone is one sex over the other, and thinking you're one sex whilst being entirely a different one physically, isn't that point. Of course, dressing up as a woman so that you're passable would be fine. Dressing up and looking like a man isn't fine (if you're MTF). Whilst you may see it as unfair to one group of people, it's also unfair to force it onto people that might be uncomfortable being around someone of a different physical gender (which may just make up a larger group of people).

It's really not your business to say when someone can use the disabled facilities or not. See how that works? We have this objective point where someone is disabled or not. Just like what is to be female or not.

Some people get off on listening to the opposite sex use the toilet. That's no different than sneaking/snooping to gain sexual pleasure from afar, for any reason. Of course, this is an extreme act, which people can do anyway. But the discomfort of having men around women in women's facilities would be something that can't be overlooked.



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09 Feb 2015, 4:07 am

Dillogic wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Its really not any of your buisiness how far along a transgender person is in their transition or if they are even getting physical transition surgery/treatment since that is their private business. Also how is sitting in the next stall to someone anything like stalking or sneaking up on someone while bathing?


Why not? There's obviously a point where someone is one sex over the other, and thinking you're one sex whilst being entirely a different one physically, isn't that point. Of course, dressing up as a woman so that you're passable would be fine. Dressing up and looking like a man isn't fine (if you're MTF). Whilst you may see it as unfair to one group of people, it's also unfair to force it onto people that might be uncomfortable being around someone of a different physical gender (which may just make up a larger group of people).

It's really not your business to say when someone can use the disabled facilities or not. See how that works? We have this objective point where someone is disabled or not. Just like what is to be female or not.

Some people get off on listening to the opposite sex use the toilet. That's no different than sneaking/snooping to gain sexual pleasure from afar, for any reason. Of course, this is an extreme act, which people can do anyway. But the discomfort of having men around women in women's facilities would be something that can't be overlooked.


I am saying i am of the opinion transgender women should be allowed to use the woman's bathroom, even if they have not done a full on surgical transition. Its not really anyone's business to peek is what I meant, and its certainly no ones business to demand someone produce an ID to prove their gender to use a restroom. I certainly don't want that hassle...and it would be BS to have someone stand outside the bathroom and demand anyone who doesn't look feminine enough pull out an ID.....But all that said even if such a policy was enacted, transgender people can have IDs that say their gender they are transitioning to and not the sex(physical gender) they where born as so it wouldn't work anyways. Feel free to disagree, but as a female I have no issue with transgender females even without proper genitals to use the female bathroom...am I not entitled to that opinion?

And why don't you do some research on the difference between sex and gender and what it means when they do not match up, and you might find that even science proves ones sex doesn't always match their gender...you can have a female brain in a male body and vice versa. Having a disability or not is more clear cut than gender actually, expecially since gender does not always reflect which sex someone is born as


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