Anyone Here Want Kids or Trying to Conceive?

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Forkful: December 10th is a great due date! Mom was due Dec 15th with me- but I stayed around until Christmas . So jealous though! I really want a Christmas/Holiday baby... but not NEARLY enough to wait willingly for Dec 2014 to be a mommy... I'll get over it...

... Obsessive? I am not sure what you mean... *laughs* sorry... yea.. I probably am a bit. I do temp religiously, ovulation predictor tests from cd 7 on, I've been taking Soy Isoflavones to jump-start ovulation, as I generally ovulate late and I believe that to be the cause of my earlier miscarriage- old uterine lining and poor egg quality are supposed to be pretty common with cd20+ ovulation. But last month was the 3rd month of soy, so I can't do that again (or I'm not supposed to... and I don't want to screw things up so I'm not doing it again) so this month I'm starting Fertilitea... hopefully that works and I won't have to go back to the soy- though I did really like it as I had ovulation on cd's 15, 20, and 17 while on soy. Much better than my usual 20-25- ok, the 20 wasn't, but I think that month I was on too high of a dosage. Anyways....

I also take evening primrose oil to help with cm, and have tried tracking ferns- and do so sporadically, but havent' found that to be particularly helpful. So... maybe a bit obsessive. I just don't want this to take forever, since I already served my 3 years without kids :/. I have a lot of the signs of estrogen dominence... and that worries me. But, having no job = having no insurance (I told you I was better-off 3 years ago) and that means I'm left to do this trying to conceive thing on my own. Which, probably makes me a little more obsessive about it than I would normally be, since my knowledge and persistance could make all the difference in the world.


Mikassyna: I've been over there a few times, but it just looks like a lot of people that are already parents, and issues with/ talk about children. I'll go check it out though.

Some of us (pre-kids) were just like you at one time

I have one child and love him to death. I would like to have two more. Can I handle it? I do not know BUT I do know that I thought I was not ready to handle one and I think I am doing okay.

Structrix: Aww! Good to hear you are doing ok. I'm majorly concerned about my functioning and parenting... but functioning is so fluid- it's bound to bounce around. I'll just have to jump in head first and hope for the best. Assuming I can actually get pregnant and keep the baby *sigh*

You just have to make sure that you keep your resources, your friends, family, doctors, close and that if you are feeling stressed or that you are feeling overwhelmed that you can lean on them for support. There is NO one telling you that you have to be supermom and at the end of the day when your child is wanting to jump into your arms and no one elses' then it give some sense of peace that you are doing okay and that your little one is happy and content.

I dont see how this would have changed anything? So if you had already tried to conceive, when you had more resources, then you still would live now with a little kid with less resources. As long as you are able to provide the real important stuff like a safe place to sleep and live, medical attention, food and parental support and love, I dont see the big problems. My dad also was not rich, but libraries, second hand shops, street markets, ... helped us a lot.

Thats the thing I am also a bit afraid of. Typical pregnant groups that are all totally into baby this and that. So I really like babies and also have cared for those of friends and my partners step cousins, but I rather hang myself then being with my mom in law 2 hours in ToysRus, so that I do not only find fitting baby cloths, but fashionables too. (And if I told her, that I personally think that 90° washable cloths from streetmarkets or friends are really sufficient, I think she would sue me. ^^) I am often afraid that people will think that my missing desire for such stuff, will seem to other people that I dont care. So step-cousins of my husband had offered us to receive their boys baby cloths, if they dont need them themselves in the time, and my mother in law answered that we cant relie on that, because we still need to think of the possibility, that we could receive a girl. Yop, I think if our newborn will be a girl and not receive pink babycloths in the first 12 months, then I will be responsible for her needing a lifelong therapy... XD So I know and respect that for older NT-girls that can be important, thats why I said to be happy to have the grandmother for that, but sometimes she is really overdoing it.

I had my copper-IUD today removed, and we are only starting to try to conceive, so right now we simply try it the natural way, without temperature and all that stuff. So I know general about the female cyclus and that the best time to receive is around the middle of menstruation and that my partner should not be doing handjobs all day ^^ around that time, but we are not like "Oh my god, you have to immediately leave work, according to my temperature computer, I just got my egg-"whatever it is in english"." ^^ Additionally out of my last doctors blood test informations, my gyn-doctor gave me some additional iron and fol-acid medication, because of me having a bit too less.

@shaybugs What did you mean: "If I can keep the baby?" Are you afraid to loose it in womb, or that your parents in law will try to take it from you, because of you being Asperger? O_o

Generally you should try not to produce stress on your own with your childwish. I am working at a building company, and one of our chiefworkers tried to get pregnant fro years. When they renewed the birth- and pregnancy department of our countries largest hospital, he often had contact to the medical chief of the birth- and pregnancy doctors and used it to ask him for help. He simply told him to take a 6 week holidays that was only to relaxing, and if they had 6 months later still no pregnancy, he shall come again. Our company was not happy with him asking for 6 week vacation, but in the end they have now two kids. So try to reduce stress. Its also logic from a biologic view: If a woman is always under stress, then its not a good time for the body to become pregnant, to receive a baby, that needs a lot of work and so is adding stress. That you are stressed, because of the wish for a child, your body doesnt know. ^^

Schneekugle: First of all- Best of luck with getting your baby! I hope you don't have to wait months- or years- to have him/her! Keep me updated please .

The fact that we are in a worse spot changes the likelihood of my having children. After hubby and I exchanged vows, up until 6 months after our wedding, I was on Depo Provera. I loved it while I was on it, and I got off of it OK- but my periods... changed somehow. Before I didn't really have PMS, and now I always do. I looked up online, and it appears at the very least I have estrogen dominence- which means I still have lots of estrogen in me after ovulation. At the worst, I have low progesterone (well... not THE worst- but the worst case that I'm able to have an idea of for my own. And low progesterone would say that I CAN get pregnant.... but I will most likely miscarry unless the progesterone issue is addressed early-early. And without a doctor monitoring... that's unlikely/difficult. Also, I might have crappy egg quality, seeing as I don't usually ovulate until cycle day 20+. And my cycles are generally 29-34 days. So yea... that is the major difference.

I love looking at baby clothes myself, but I don't know if I could do 2 hours in Babies R Us. The real problem is... a lot of NT's don't support girls that don' work having kids... no insurance is really bad. I don't see it as being something that finances should control. I mean, money is a transitory thing... babies are natural and biological. Also, we're more fertile when younger, so why waste that time?

As for support- I have my hubby and that's about it. But that isn't going to change, adn for all I know it'll take 2 years to concieve- and keep- the baby. So best start now... but i'm hoping it's not that long

Reason for fear of miscarraige: Had one in Jan 2012, and my monthly cycles aren't re-assuing.

When I was pregnant with my first son, I spontaneously started to bleed heavily at work at an early point during my first trimester. I panicked and rushed to my OBGYN, who tested me and found out that I had very low (through the floor!) progesterone. He put me on progesterone supplements and my son was born healthy (with later dx'd PDD-NOS, LOL). I also had a bit of scare with my quad screening which necessitated an amnio, but luckily the amnio turned up fine.

Fast forward to my second pregnancy--my doctor put me on progesterone supplements automatically as a precautionary measure.

A good doctor will be on top of all of this, especially if you have a history. My OBGYN's specialty was in high-risk pregnancies, which I qualified for given my age.

Mikassyna- Right, I know a good doctor would be on top of all this. But, as I can't utilize a doctor, I'm making do on my own. Hoping that with herbs and such I can straighten it out myself.

That being said, I'm so glad that your doctor was able to save your first baby!

Please please please be careful with the herbs. Many herbs that seem innocuous can have unintended side effects that could be dangerous. I wish you the best of luck on your journey to conceive and I will send positive thoughts your way!! !

Mikassyna: Thanks! I'm careful. I did 3 months of Soy Isoflavones, and that really helped with earlier ovulation... but not pregnant yet. So that was nice. Now I'm on breka from that and starting Fertilitea. Which, hopefully works too. Lots of good reviews on it.

I had read that too much soy could cause problems with boy babies so I steered clear of too much soy during pregnancy. Here are some articles to read to help weigh your decision:

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/soy/NS ... ION=safety
http://healthybabycode.com/5-myths-abou ... meat-dairy

mikassyna
I agree with you on the Soy. I have gone so far as to ban any formula that had soy as well. My baby was breastfed but we did have to supplement his milk with formula after a while. I just made sure that it was not soy based.

You're not the only one. I want to have children and intend on starting to try with my fiance in a month or so. We've picked out names: he gets to name the first boy and the second girl, I get to name the first girl and the second boy. We aren't very well off, so that is a concern, but I'll do the best I can.

Mikassyna/Structrix: With Soy Isoflavones, it's taken like clomid- ONLY cycle days 3-7, and nothing after that. It's basically tricking your body into thinking there is no estrogen so it produces more. But yea, I'd never have it in pregnancy.

Got my Fertilita in today! It's not bad-tasting- so that's good. Now to just see what it does for my cycle-wise.

former_hermit: Yay! That seems like a good compromise/plan. I picked out my first daughter's name when I was 13- Stacey Danielle, and about a year ago we picked out name for second daughter together- Gabriella Diane, and he insists that he's picking out a son's name. I'm scared! I'm very picky about names... but I suppose it's only fair. When are you two getting married? Good luck with trying to conceive!

We aren't well off either but hey, if everyone waited until they were "well off" to have kids then only the rich would have them and they tend to only have a few anyway.