Anyone Here Want Kids or Trying to Conceive?

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No doubt anymore, that there are some movements in my belly. (21st week now) So its no regular movement as that mentioned boxing or kicking, but from now and then there are 2-3 little soft pushes or touches. I think its the baby changing its position.

According to the doctors ts already about 20 cm long (I think thats about 6-7 inches.) But it was snuggled in itself, the last time, so the doctor could not fully measure it. ^^ And had to do a "sugar-test" this week. I was told to come in the morning without eating before, I thought they would simply take some blood, and thats it. Needed to drink a full cup of sugarwater, and then they took every hour blood from me for three times, so they can measure if I have any troubles with sugar level or diabetes. ..... That stuff was really disgusting. Burp.... *shiver*

And already found our baby furniture in an internet offering. A fenced bed that can be adjusted to a small kids bed, a shelf and a smaller shelf with a bigger plate and a frame around it for the pamperschanging. Massive wood, done by an carpenter, with teddybears graved into it, for 100EUR, only 10 minutes from where we live. The ones that owned it before meant, that they were simply happy for someone coming for it and collecting it from them directly, so they dont need to carry it themselves down the stairs for removal Thank god for for the existence of lazy, rich Yuppies. O_o Cleansed and desinfected it, and now its waiting in our sleeping room, until the kids room is done.

And only one week to go until we learn if its a girl or a boy.

12 more weeks to go and I have gained ten pounds so far. I started to nest and I am not sure if I have enough baby clothes for my newborn. I have a pile of them already when I went through them and I have some diapers including cloth ones from when my son was in them. Last time I had so much I thought I had too much but that meant I could go a whole month without washing any because that is how many he had and he went though three or four outfits a day. This time I can do the laundry every few days when I run low on them. I just go to second hand stores for them and plan on hitting yard sales when they happen again. I also went through my son's old clothes to see what can be used on a girl and the rest to give away.

Only twelve weeks, I am jealous for you. Actually I passed "half-time". About the baby cloths, I sadly dont know, because of it being my first kid. I relie on informations about the amount of babycloths needed or certain stuff/items, upon friends. There are as well homepages of parents on the internet, that are offering informations about "What your REALLY need for your baby." on which I relie on. According to them, I have not actually that much now, more the basic stuff. So they tell you to have only some basic items, and then let the partner care for it, when the baby is actually born and you know of the size it actually has. ^^ The first 2-3 days, you spend mostly anyway in hospital with the baby, until eventual wounds have closed again and the "organs returning to their before birth places" has started well.

I hear so much different versions about how often you need the change the cloths. So my parents said, two times was sufficiently (as long as the pampers are fitting), and they regularly changed it in the morning and in the evening. But other friends have as well told me, that they needed to change cloths 4 times a day? Did you need that much of cloth change, due to spitting/sobbering or because of them doing so much mess with the milk, or because of some crap coming out of the pampers...?

Sorry, if I am actually asking such maybe stupid questions. I did care for some toddlers of friends and families, but mostly when they were already beyond 3-6 months, so that they dont need to get breastfeeded anymore. So I miss knowledge about the very young babies. But when I am in my baby holidays before birth, I will visit as well a training that is offered by midwifes, that teach about the basics. Friend of mine will as well give birth two months before me, so I hope that I can help her, and as well learn for my own one during that time.

My son had a few diaper blow outs but they always happened when we were at home fortunately. He occasionally vomited and I would have to change him again. I had to change his clothes when he would spit up on them. I found out burping a baby isn't always necessary because mine would just spit up more when I did that. But if they are crying and won't stop, you can pat their back to see if they have gas. You may also go through different outfits too during the day if you don't like walking around with spit up milk on you. Because we had a coin operated washing machine and dryer, I was a nudest in my apartment to save on laundry and some parents just stay in the same outfit because they know it will get dirty again anyway. I didn't see the point in wearing any clothes unless I was out because they would get dirty anyway. I had no idea babies did these things until I had my own. I knew they spat up but I didn't think it was a daily thing and frequent and I didn't know you would be wearing their spit. He has also leaked on me too when his plastic pants didn't hold and I once had to take a shower when he was lying on my chest and he vomited his milk and it went all over me and in my hair and I had to clean him up and then shower and wash my hair. It was rare I had to change an outfit right after putting it on him. But lot of the times, an outfit needed to be changed due to the spit up in my experience.

If you go out in public with a infant, you will want to bring extra outfits with. With a toddler, you may want to bring pants with in case their diapers leak, my husband once sent me home to get a pair of pants for our son because he leaked in the restaurant and he didn't want him going without pants in the store. When they are first potty trained, you may still want to bring extra pants with in case they have an accident and extra pairs of underwear for them. But some parents put diapers or pull ups on their kids when they go out for in case they have an accident.

It's different when they are your own vs watching them or help taking care of them. Mine was breastfed until he was 17 months and he basically weaned himself so I didn't have to do any of the work weaning him. Once he got on solids, he wanted my boobs less and I stopped offering my boob often and then he was only breast fed in mornings and at night. He also didn't miss my milk when he would be away.

If you have your own washer and dryer, expect you may be washing the clothes every three days or so is my guess but that depends on how many baby outfits you have.

Your experiences sounds a bit like that funny week, when our cats kittens already were able to run around, but were yet non-able to propperly control their bladder/digestive system. I did not know, that babies do as well so much spitting in their very young age, I only experienced it, when the older ones got their teeth. Luckily we have our own washing machine, so that should work.

Cloths should now be as well no prob, doctor mentioned our baby to be a boy, so we can use all the cloths from my partners "brother in law".

Little Lars is already pretty active, and I think, he might be as well able to recognize certain feelings or sounds. So when I was waiting for the cashier row in the supermarket, and had a pack of frozen spinache in my hand - pressed against my body, he suddenly made some very strong movements, when my belly became cold. ^^ Happened as well, when a dish with food slipped from my hand, and I was yelling a bad word and excited about it. And malecat lying on my belly, massaging it with his paws and purring loudly, caused as well already an reaction from the baby. ^^

Only grandma will be a bit disappointed, she hoped so much for a little girl.

I was whondering about the 17 months? I always thought it would become uncomfortable, when the kids get their teeth. At least thats why people around here try to fed them regularly before they are around 9th months?

Did it not cause any problems to you?

I am jealous about your 10 pounds. ^^ I lost some weight in the beginning, but now already gained as well 10 pounds, but I am about two months behind you. And 4 pounds of that seemed to have grown on my boobs. ^^ They have gone now from a small B-cup to a large C and according to the shop-assistant, might still become larger. O_o

My partner and I have talked about trying. But I don't know how to go about finding an OB. Can anyone share with me how you've searched for a doctor who knows how to work with you? I think it's extremely important because my only experiences with doctors have all been negative and I'm stuck in approaching doctors with distrust and fear.

I tried to talk to one OB which ended in a major disaster. The receptionist laughed at me when I couldn't tell her why I was visiting and there was a pediatrician's office across from his office and a kid was howling and screaming in there and I had to wait an hour to be seen. So by the time I got in, I had more or less shut down and I could only mechanically stutter at him and I started perserverating then didn't know how to end the appointment. My partner had to gently end the thing and take me home where I melted down then refused to speak to anyone for a day. :/ I don't know how to handle this. I don't think it helps that I can pass off as extremely articulate because I have a lot of facts about my medical conditions memorized and I can spew it all out but when it comes to negotiating with others, I can't find words to express my ideas and feelings so a lot of healthcare providers tend not to take me seriously.

I have googled for the shortcut of an OB. If I get it right, its a doctor that is specified for conceiving of children and will as well be the one, that will be assisting you during the conceivement.

So I dont know if I can help you. In my country, the medical assistance during pregnancy is done by the normal gyn, that you visit anyway for any other gyn probs. While the actual assistance of the conceivement, will be done by an midwife. Only if there are any complication, that might need an surgery (cesarian ...), then an doctor will join as well, but that will not be my gyn, but simply the hospital OB, who has currently shift.

I think, just like with a normal gyn or dentist, you will simply need to give different doctors a try, until you find one, that you like.

Normally all doctors actually have E-mails as well, so you could write the doctors assistance an E-mail, explaining your probs that you have with noises ... and ask her for a date at an time, where they have less patients. (As example late in the evening, so that you are the last one, or very early in the morning.) I experienced as well, that new doctors are normally more friendly. So they dont have that much patients yet, and are normally happy for every new one. The downside of it, is that they might have less experience yet.

If an receptionist laughs at you, I´d simply leave. As well that I dont go to any doctors, that dont give you exact times to come, but simply tell you to come, and then you sit there for hours waiting. -.- I have no prob, if I need to wait 15 minutes, because of the patient before me needing more time then planned, but waiting for hours with tons of other noisy people, simply is not tolerable for me.

Most of my weight started packing on since my son's birthday and I have gained two pounds over night a couple times. I gained less last time for how far along I am now but my diet was different then and then I packed on some weight in my last month of pregnancy in short amount of time despite how hard it was to eat and having no appetite and not being able to eat every two hours because I would forget. You do lose your appetite when the baby gets so big they squish your organs so you get full faster and not feel hungry as much and you find you won't be able to eat as much every meal like you used to because that is how small your stomach is because of the baby squishing it. I probably put on around seven pounds in one month and that was after Thanksgiving until my son was born. I will probably put on more and maybe gain a little more than my last pregnancy. I still have ten more weeks to go so that is two months left of my pregnancy.

My son bit me a few times but not often so I was able to breastfeed still even when he got teeth.

Hope everything is fine with all of you. Only 6-7 weeks to go for me, and actually it seems as if my Little one is hyper active. (Kicking me all day.) At least if he would use his activity to turn into the right Position, but no, Mr. Buddha prefers to sit upright all the time. ^^ Hope he still turns down with his head, I am totally afraid of needing to do an cesarian Operation. (According to the doctor he is already two weeks taller then normal, so if he Comes on time and is still headed wrong, then the Hospital recommends me for Operation. )

I just wanted to say that having a C-Section isn't too horrible.

Yes, the healing takes time and you aren't up and around as quickly, but in the scheme of things, if it's safer for the baby then don't hesistate.

I had a C-section in 1989 (was fully awake after epidural).

then in 2010 had hysterectomy via the same C-section cut.

Enjoy your babies. I know it sounds cliche, but time does go by fast.

I can hardly believe my 'baby' is 24 years old.

If the doctors recommend it for the babys sake, then I will trust on them. Still I´d really like to avoid it, so even the little cut from the appendicitis-OP bugged me a very long time, so I am very afraid of the bigger cut, a C-section will need. Friend of mine, who gave birth two weeks ago, was already doing walks with her little one, a week afterward. As well that my house entrance is above ground level, and I needed to get the childrens-car up and down the stairs, whenever I wanted to leave the house, and I am afraid if I am able to manage it with the C-sections cut.

I hope everything will be fine with your advice of "enyoing them while they are babies". Actually now that I had the little freshborn of my friend in my arms a few times, and do actually wash all the little baby cloths I got, I think I got an extra hormon boost. I cant wait anymore, to have my own little one in my arms.

My son was born in Oct 1989, we had a frigid November. Taking him out for the fun of it was not happening.

I gave birth on a tuesday (day of San Francisco earthquake that happened during the world series).
I joke that the day my son was born, the whole world shook!

I was in the hospital until Saturday and then spent a week at my parents house.
I was a single parent (my son never met his father)

I was home alone with a newborn when he was <2 weeks old, after a c-section.
I breastfed so at least I didn't have to get up and do the bottle thing at night.

I had never held a newborn, never changed a diaper, nor had I spent time around babies.

I was about as clueless as you could get.

Enjoy your baby. Even if you get a fussy one (like I had). I think my son cried so much because he was frustrated he couldn't talk - as a newborn!

the most important thing (IMO) you can do with a baby is always be talking to him/her. They don't care what you are talking about when they are newborns. No baby talk, just regular talk. My son loved to hear me talk. I could have read the phone book to him, he didn't care

Babies don't judge you. I loved this!

From the ages of 2-5, when I read to my son, I taped my reading and us talking. He would listen to the tapes all the time. I recently converted the cassette tapes to MP3s. Listening to to those tapes was so much fun and something I will always cherish.

Hi, I just wanted to introduce myself. Ive ALWAYS wanted kids and always saw myself as a "natural mother", but knew I'd have trouble conceiving. I didnt 'suspect' or 'worry' about it like most women do, I knew, despite v regular periods etc.

We have been trying for 4 1/2 years without even a hint of a positive test. It has been soul-destroying at times, watching my friends get pregnant because they think it will be easier than working etc, but I'm very logical usually and I have recently come to terms with the fact its now v unlikely we'll have them naturally. I must be meant for something else, although I still feel like a mother without her child. I'd go for adoption if my partner was as keen. I could easily become attached to any child I looked after long-term but he is not sure about how he would cope with that. He's much more keen on IVF (he feels he would bond with his own instantly), but I'm not sure I could go through all of that after what I've already been through

It doesn't help that one of my "special interests" has always been pregnancy and birth. I just love everything about it- it is a miraculous process and can be an empowering experience for those who want kids- feminism at its finest. Anyone else have this obsession? I do get sad that I will probably never get to experience it myself, but I can still be happy for any pregnant woman, and be interested in the process. I'd love to be a midwife but not while I am going through this- on bad days I wouldn't make it into work.

Anyway, nice to meet you all, and good luck to those who are pregnant or trying. In the "NT" forums they say "baby dust!", but that makes me cringe lol.

Hi, Just wondering whether you are pregnant yet, and whether you found a good OB? I really hope so, as I know how hard this fear of doctors can be... I am in the UK and dont know how it all works where you are, so cant help with how to find a good doctor, sorry- we just get referred by our GPs- not much choice with the NHS (national health service).

My experience with doctors has been the same as you- I have had awful experiences with them throughout my entire life- laughing etc, not believing that I am in severe pain, ignoring my suggestions or thinking I am a hypochondriac (I am the total opposite because I dont go to the docs unless I absolutely have to- once completely lost my voice for 3 months before someone dragged me there). Im just sooo sick of it and cant take much more.

I can also appear articulate (but break down and seem like a madwoman when they react badly, just like you!), and this is a major problem for doctors- they like to think that everyone is stupid and sometimes actually enjoy making you feel that way. When I said I had endometriosis my doc totally ignored me, but I had a laparoscopy last week to investigate about 10 years of indescribable period pain (and to shed light on the infertility problem). They found... endometriosis, *surprise surprise* but he STILL tried to tell me I was wrong in some way. When I said "I knew that, was it on the left near the bowel? Thats where I feel it most" He looked shocked and said "errr no! it was in the middle...(eyes flick from side to side) and a bit on the right". It IS on the left too- I could see his diagram from the operation that accidentally came through the carbon paper onto a note i was given for my GP lol. WHY LIE?! I just don't understand it. Despite me begging him to tell me what happened during the op I only got to know about the endo afterwards because I was too instantly awake for him to ignore me waving from my bed haha. I was 100% awake and lucid, and he will most likely tell me I remembered wrong.

Beforehand, I insisted I am the sort of person who NEEDS to know straight away for the sake of my mental health, but I still have to wait 6 weeks before I see him again. I think I would've actually "lost it" if I hadnt been forceful enough to at least get the endo diagnosis before I left the hospital. It makes everything 10 times worse not even knowing what happened in the op- what level of operation I am healing from? How much should I rest? I hope my sharing this makes you feel like you are not alone, or silly for having this fear.

I made this thread earlier in case anyone's interested.

Link: Infertility/Hyper-fertility and autism

Its less because of the fun of it, but to do normal grocery shopping ... (around here, you can get into troubles with insurance, if I am involved into an car accident, while recovering from C-section.) As well that the thought of not leaving the house for weeks, really give me the creeps. -.-

Additional I live in Austria, which is a rather similar neighbor country of Switzerland, so we have cold weather half of the year. Therefore the strollers available here, normally are able to be adjusted with winter wheels (Yop, we do have snow wheels for strollers. ^^) and having a sheepfur - sleeping bags for the stroller is standard. ^^ In the rural, you need it anyway as well for the babyslide. (When there is too much snow for the stroller-winter-wheels. ^^ )