Is There Anyone Who DOESN'T Want To Have Kids?

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I don't want to actually concieve a child, but I would love to adopt.

Maybe I shouldn't have one but then my husband be sad. He really wants kids. But he said he'll help me and I can just go to work and he can stay home and take card of the child.

I wouldn't want a foster child. Most of them have issues, more than normal kids because they suffered abuse or neglect or they have been from one foster home to foster home or have been with different families and then they hand them back to the state because people don't have patience with them. So they don't behave and they rebel because why bother being good if their new parents will get rid of them anyway? It takes lot of patience to put up with it until the child realizes they are not going anywhere so you earn their trust. I would rather adopt a baby from foster care and that is real difficult to do because everyone wants a baby.

I don't want to have children either. Ironically, I do love children, that is to say, certain kinds of children. When I was in high school I used to babysit two very smart and creative kids, and I really enjoyed it. I like children because they are more honest than adults and have been less corrupted by society.

I don't want to have children mostly because I dread being pregnant and giving birth. I love my body too much (especially my vagina ) to let it be hurt so much. I also don't see myself ever getting married--I despise authority/dominance, I want to have a career, and I hate house work--and I don't think I could be a single parent. Oh, the state of the world, and the knowledge that we are all probably going to die from a nuclear war and/or the result of global warming, are contributing factors too.

I don't ever want kids.

I don't ever want to be changing dirty nappies or having them pee in the bath all over me :X

I don't wanna have to push round a pram all day.

I don't wanna be woken up at 4am every morning by that annoying crying.

In fact, I don't even want a fulltime relationship with a MAN cos I'm so scared I'll get up the stick, even with protection

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I'm a writer, not a fighter and my pen is always loaded.

Magnús Scheving is my Icelandic rose

Hm. I'm pro-choice, so I'm fine with having a boyfriend, but there are better things I could do with $400.

You certainly aren't alone Auri - I have never wanted children either, since I was far younger than you are now. I am in my late twenties and while I will concede that there is a slight possibility of my changing my mind in the future, I think it's highly unlikely. I am of the opinion that people should be parents when they are young and energetic, and of course fiscally stable - and to be both those things in today's world is very difficult indeed. The first is almost out the window for me (not that I think I'm old, exactly!), and the second is approaching very gradually.... (Not to mention I'm single, and I do believe that a strong family unit is best - though absolutely not essential - for a happy childhood). Even if I desperately wanted children, I'm not sure I could justify it to myself. And this is totally setting aside the reasons mentioned by other women above: current state of the world, the abundance of orphans needing adoption, the effects of pregnancy and the ever-horrifying necessity of giving birth.

I think it shows great character to stand up for what your opinions are, especially with issues like this where there is such a strongly-established norm. It is important to acknowledge that there is always the possibility of change, but I completely sympathise with the frustration of receiving the "Oh, you'll change your mind one day!" comments. I once got that from a smugly smiling stranger (alliteration!) who felt a compulsion to contradict my polite, "Oh, I'm not going to have children," so I turned and replied with big sad eyes that I was infertile (which to my knowledge is not true), then walked away. Childish, yes, but also very satisfying. Why complete strangers feel a need to say such personal things bewilders me. I can take it from people who know me but from those who don't.... Just.... hush. Perhaps this is a bit of a sore point with me? Though, for the record, I usually endeavour to be much more gracious!

So in a nutshell: continue being just exactly who you are and rest assured that you are certainly not alone out there!

Even though I'm 16, I'm waiting until I'm in my late 30's to have a kid. I want to go to university and become well-established in my carrer before considering a kid.

A few weeks ago, I took care of a robotic infant for the weekend. You need to change its nappies, feed it, rock it, and support its neck. Mine woke me up at around 2200 hrs and around 0400 hrs. Unlike a real baby, it didn't maske messes, it didn't need to be bathed, it didn't get sick, it wasn't warm, it didn't move. It was a great expirience for me and that reinforced my decision to have a kids.

I can't have kids. I have known this since I was very young.

The thing is I do not want kids, I have not really thought about having kids. I don't want to have foster kids or adopt either.

I don't think that I could properply care for a child emotionally or financially*. Also, I don't "crave" children like other women seem to.

I would be content with a partner, a small house, and some pets.

* I'm still in high school, but I have a feeling that I will be on the poorer side no matter what career I choose. It costs something like a million dollars to raise a child, plus more if you send them to college.

It is ok to not want kids. You are not alone. I can't tell you how many times I got looked at like I was a complete freak when I said I didn't want kids. I still get those looks, of course, and it still makes me angry. Finally, now that I'm 33 and married, I found a doctor that agreed to perform a tubal, no questions asked. I told several of my past doctors that I wanted my tubes tied, but none of them would do it. Like I can't make up my own mind about what I want to do with my body. I've heard the "oh, you'll change your mind" and the "you just haven't found the right guy yet" BS. But, the decision was made when I was 9 & my mom told me about the "birds and the bees". I was completely HORRIFIED!! ! It's never changed, in 24 years, so it's time.
Don't think I could handle the mess, the change in routine, and change in general lifestyle that comes with having kids. Don't like it when house is messy or stuff gets out of place.
Don't compromise what you want out of life because other people don't agree! Hang in there.
Manda

When I was a child, I did not want to have children. The thought of changing diapers was repulsive and a deal breaker for me. I never played with dolls. I shaved their heads, colored on their bodies, popped off their heads and tossed them around but I never mothered them. I was never pressured or expected to have children or get married.

Then, as a young adult, I ended up pregnant when I failed to know (and nobody had told me) that antibiotics negate birth control. When he was born, I was terrified because I had no idea what to do. I was my parents' youngest child and hadn't been around many babies, and definitely was never in charge of anyone. But I learned.

I have four kids. I live for them. I have two step-daughters. I love them with all my heart, too. I used to run an in-home child care before moving to Florida. I volunteer with Sunday School at Church and the soccer league keeps wanting me to coach.

I wish I could have more children but the doctor said that my uterus was almost transparent when I delivered my youngest (c-section). I should not have more children because my uterus could burst. If insurance would have handled it, he would have extended my surgery to do a tubaligation right there. Instead of putting me under the knife again, we went the cheaper and less invasive route and my husband got a vasectomy. We may become foster parents once we move into a home that's big enough.

I don't think maternal instincts or wanting to have children or any of that is related to or affected by Aspergers Syndrome. There's plenty of childfree NTs who feel the same way as the aspies on here. To thine own self be true.

Every man I've seen go through a vasectomy has said that it's much easier than what it was made out to be. The only key is to really make sure to rest. You won't feel too sore so you'll want to get up and do stuff, but you have to fight that urge and just rest. You could actually hurt yourself if you do too much afterward. But the procedure and recovery are said to be a breeze. AND, if you ever do change your mind for whatever reason, they're reversible. Vasectomies are the way to go.