do you feel jealousy toward other females?

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Do you feel jealousy toward other women?
Yes, a lot. 8%  8%  [ 14 ]
Yes, a lot. 8%  8%  [ 14 ]
Yes, a little. 19%  19%  [ 33 ]
Yes, a little. 19%  19%  [ 33 ]
No, none. 22%  22%  [ 38 ]
No, none. 22%  22%  [ 38 ]
Total votes : 170

Pandora
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03 Dec 2006, 8:07 am

I don't care if another woman is thinner than me. I don't care if they have better clothes or more money. But if I liked a guy and they flirted with him, I wouldn't like it.

For some reason, other women seem to see me as a threat and I'm not flirty or anything like that. Women are just as territorial in their own way as men so I prefer to have male friends.

As a teenager and younger woman, I really envied girls who could talk to boys easily while I was painfully shy. Confidence tends to come with age so it's not such an issue now. I also envy people being assertive and not bursting into tears when they are contradicted.


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SpaceCase
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16 Feb 2007, 12:20 am

I have NEVER been jealous of ANYONE when it comes to looks,personality,intelligence,money,etc...BUT I HAVE been jealous/depressed back when I was raped at age thirteen and the other girls my age were all virgins.


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ZanneMarie
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16 Feb 2007, 1:04 pm

I can't say I ever noticed, much less felt jealous. I didn't really think about it until I saw this post. If it was a guy involved? I would just immediately dump him and walk away. I wouldn't actually think about her at all. It would either be a case of he obviously doesn't want me, so I don't want him or he had a commitment to me which means he lied to be with her and that would be it for me. I never trust a liar again (regardless of whether it is a relationship or not). To me, they're sorry means nothing. I'm done.


Figure? Hair? I don't even notice that stuff. I'm the one you would ask if so and so isn't that woman who is short with dark hair and I'd have a blank look even if I've worked with her for a long time. That's true of men as well. I really don't register people well at all. They have to be intellectually interesting to me and even then, I won't register much about their appearance. Which I suppose is funny because I do wear makeup, jewelry, nice clothes and get my hair dyed and my nails done. So I am and always was (well at least from 2nd grade) a girly girl.

I never think about who has what as far as money, cars, whatever. I always figure if I want it, I can go get it. I have a huge house and there's just my husband and I. I mean we can only use so much space, so why would we need more? I never get the material thing. If I had my laptop, I wouldn't care where I lived (which may explain why it's on my husband to get the place, furnish it and take care of it).


If anything, I think I was kind of the opposite. I'm extremely internalized and serious most of the time. I view most interactions with people as interruptions and I don't get socialization for its own sake at all. So, when I was growing up that was hard for me. I would be off on the playground by myself writing and I'd get "bothered" all the time to play or something by the other kids. Then, when I hit about thirteen, I guess, boys started trying to get me to notice them and I would just ask why. I was told I was attractive which I think is still an entirely subjective thing. That kept up and happens even now that I've been married 25 years (which is completely bizarre to me). In fact that whole phenomenon happens to me still (just insert random social talking and asking to lunch for the kids asking me to play). But, what that did to me was actually kind of strange. I would, and still do sometimes, get the urge to cut my face and body so they would leave me alone. Not in a self hate way or pain way, but more that I felt if I was disfigured they would leave me alone to my own world and my stories and that was what I wanted. I viewed whatever they saw me in me as a liability. I still do. It's just a strange thing to me that they talk to me or try to flirt with me when I am so obviously in my own world.


So, I guess those are all reverse jealousies.



mariiha
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17 Feb 2007, 5:45 pm

In the past I would silently shout at myself "i am ugly and stupid, have no friends, no personality, no wit, no charm, no life" until I learned to accept myself the way I am.
I had the honor to have a very wise piano teacher, Mr. Stone whom I love dearly, that told me "we make do with what we have". I didn't get it right away, but I do now! I've treasured that quote and repeat it quite often. So this is my sincere gift to all of you that may feel you got shafted! :D



Cheerlessleader
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09 Mar 2007, 11:32 am

I get very jealous of NT girls because they are very mean to everyone and yet everyone loves them for it! I'm honest, polite, I don't say anything nasty without a VERY good reason, yet everyone hates me for it! Who wouldn't be jealous?



hartzofspace
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21 Mar 2007, 8:39 pm

I chose "a little," because I have suffered more from the effects of jealousy from others, than my being jealous. I have had girls being jealous of me since grade school, and I was always at a complete loss as to what was going on. I am no beauty queen, always thought of myself as homely, and it was maddening to see this jealousy cropping up, over and over. They were jealous of my hair, my grades, my good looking brothers, my clothes, etc. These things seemed to silly, that I never ever could fathom it!

I was a little jealous of the popular girls, especially when they got to date the guys I had a crush on, and who wouldn't look at me twice. Even my mother acted jealous of me, and that hurt, because I needed her to love me.


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poopylungstuffing
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22 Mar 2007, 3:49 am

I would use the word "threatened" to describe the way I can feel sometimes...I feel like..there are so many people in the world..and there are so many people who are more attractive and talented..and without all the social problems that I have..that I could easily be replaced...and it would be to my partner's benefit to be with someone who was not such a liability...as i sometimes perceive myself to be...but I have self-esteem issues....and sometimes it is hard to know better...



RedMage
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22 Mar 2007, 6:20 am

Nope, never. I'm more jealous of people who have things I want.



sunnycat
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23 Mar 2007, 11:39 am

poopylungstuffing wrote:
I would use the word "threatened" to describe the way I can feel sometimes...I feel like..there are so many people in the world..and there are so many people who are more attractive and talented..and without all the social problems that I have..that I could easily be replaced...and it would be to my partner's benefit to be with someone who was not such a liability...as i sometimes perceive myself to be...but I have self-esteem issues....and sometimes it is hard to know better...


I can relate to that...



sunnycat
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23 Mar 2007, 12:01 pm

mariiha wrote:
In the past I would silently shout at myself "i am ugly and stupid, have no friends, no personality, no wit, no charm, no life" until I learned to accept myself the way I am.
I had the honor to have a very wise piano teacher, Mr. Stone whom I love dearly, that told me "we make do with what we have". I didn't get it right away, but I do now! I've treasured that quote and repeat it quite often. So this is my sincere gift to all of you that may feel you got shafted! :D


Thanks! I really appreciate your gift...



Graelwyn
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23 Mar 2007, 4:25 pm

People used to get jealous of me apparently, but I couldn't for the life of me understand why... I asked several times during the course of my teen years at school, 'why are they so nasty to me?', when I was bullied badly, and I was told, 'they are jealous'. I never saw anything to be jealous of. I was very jealous myself at school, but not of the popular ones so much as a girl there who seemed to have everything... lots of friends, a good intellect, kindness... I also got terribly jealous when another girl got the role of Maria in Sound Of Music at school... I got the Mother Abbess. I already had terribly low self esteem and to me, that really said I was an ugly trollop. I won the show as people were going up to my mother in town to tell her how good I had been...I even saw people crying in the front row when I sung 'Climb Every Mountain', but to me, I was having to play an old person, so I must have looked ugly as sin. And in the photo in makeup, I do look ugly as sin. I was 14. It made matters even worse when the next year, she got the role of Nancy in Oliver, a part I knew so well and so wanted to play..and I got some old woman part. I turned it down and refused to be in the play altogether. This girl had long blonde hair and blue eyes and was pretty in a conventional way.

Now, I don't care what other women look like mostly, although I slightly envy those who can eat and stay thin, and I occasionally get sad when seeing a happy couple.


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23 Mar 2007, 4:36 pm

yes becoz there so bloody beautiful


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SamuraiSaxen
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30 Mar 2007, 8:21 pm

No, I'm not jealous :roll:



Melody
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05 Apr 2007, 2:15 am

Yes, I am an EXTREMELY jealous person especially when I see someone who seems to get everything given to them and go through life easily without much problem. Another thing that some people find weird is if I'm insulted by another girl I get extremely offended, angry, and defensive.. but if the same insult is given to me by a boy it doesn't bother me as much, and sometimes it doesn't bother me at all.


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Nan
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07 Apr 2007, 11:36 pm

en_una_isla wrote:
I have noticed (and this is just my observation from having been female for 33 years) that women are very jealous and catty. I'm not saying they're always this way, or that they can't be nice, but starting in school and onward into adulthood, it seemed like females were ALWAYS sizing each other up. These are some of the things they are always judging and comparing on other women:

*her figure-- fat or thin? women will be jealous of thinner women
*clothes-- trendy or not? expensive or not?
*hair
*for those with kids-- whose kid is smarter/ better behaved/ cuter etc.

I have never felt jealousy toward women on any of these issues. It was something I noticed in school-- the girls would all gossip about each other's appearance and be very jealous and comparative with each other. It was and still is completely foreign to me. WHY would someone be jealous of someone else's clothes (unless you're freezing and naked??)?



quite frankly, i rarely notice anything about them enough to care. 8)



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10 Apr 2007, 3:14 pm

I feel loads of jealousy towards other females to be honest, not all of them, but many of them. They say the right things, wear the right clothes, get the best men, and seem to be a lot happier than me.