Things you were told as a young girl

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I can't remember being told anything at all.

Mom: Don't worry if someone kidnaps you, they'll realize their mistake and bring you back.
Look at me when I'm talking to you!
Get out of my sight!
Go jump in a lake!



Grandad: You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince.
Don't date someone unless you think you might consider marrying him someday.
Eat your dinner. It's so good, it'll make your tongue slap your brains out.
Won't be much longer and we'll have to beat the boys off of you with a stick.
Eat your spinach it'll grow hair on your chest. heheheheheheh!
You look like demons were attacking you in your sleep.
IF YOU'VE BEEN SEEING SPIRITS IT'S BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN DABBLING IN SOMETHING YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO!! !




Grandmom: Stop that! That's not very ladylike!
Don't do that! That's ugly.
Why don't you go play by yourself and stop ruining everyone's good time.
You're going to turn into a video game.
You're going to turn into a noodle.
Why can't you act more feminine?

Other Grandmom: Women don't sweat.
See that that star. The brightest one. I call him Jonathan. When ever you are outside and see that star, you'll know I'm looking at the same star.
When I die I want my ashes sprinkled all over the pacific ocean.


Great Grandmom: Get away from that bed. It'll bite you!! !
Don't touch that box! The bed will bite you!!

I didn't realize mine was that long. It didn't feel very long when typing it.

Don't walk with your hands in your pockets, people'll think you're(or you look like a) yob.

Do you want to go and live with your Mother/Father? or If you don't (behave/conform/do precisisely as I say)We'll send you to a boarding school

God help the man that marries you.
You're a social ret*d.
Why do you always have to hang out with the nerds?
You need a man that will take out the garbage, fix things, and give you babies.
Just you wait until you're a parent.
You'll never find a man unless you stop biting your nails.

My mother was told when she was a girl...”don't worry too much...you'll get wrinkles". Apparently she obsessively worried about getting wrinkles from worrying too much for several weeks, looking in the mirror to check for the appearance of one! =>

Keep your knees together.

Don't sit on boys' laps ... it only excites them (and here I was all concerned about hurting something).

Don't get in a car with a boy who's been drinking.

No touching below the neck.

"It only takes 10 minutes, you know." (my mom said that after I wondered why daddy bothered to drive all the way home at lunchtime).

When I couldn't find something -

"Here it is! If it was a dog it'd bite ya" (because it was so close)

"Play with your dolls, not your Smithsonian velociraptor replica!"

"Maybe you shouldn't wear shorts; they make your legs look fat."
"Hang around outside the medical school and find a doctor to marry."
"Look me in the eye when I'm talking to you!"
"Why aren't you wearing makeup like every other girl your age?"
"You don't want to be alone forever, do you?"
"You can remember the lines to every episode of (insert TV show here), but not to do the dishes?!"

All of these are from my mom. Generally, she's not like this, but the criticism seems to stand the test of time.